EK’s Star Log

First Sex Scene of the Year on Day 17 of NaNoWriMo =P Bye-Bye Publication Goal

Wednesday, November 18, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Not my first sex scene ever, but I just wrote my first sex scene for my 2009 NaNovel.

For my 2006 NaNovel I wrote an incest story of a relationship between a man and his 14 year old granddaughter, that resulted in a baby and had so much graphic sex in it, that to this day no publisher will touch it!

For my 2007 NaNovel I had a girl fall in love with a demon and tried to keep it YA romance, but, heck, who wants to write about skimpy sex with a hot demon, and so, yeah, another *too much sex to be published* novel got written.

Boy – I’d really like to write a NaNovel I could publish when I got done, you know?

So, I swore I was not going to write sex this year. I even had myself writing a middle grade kids book, so that I won’t be tempted to write a sex scene! That book ended yesterday and this morning I started a second novel about an Incubus attack on a secluded village and wrote 13k for one sex scene with one man and 7 women – one day and only 13k words into this story and already he’s raped seven women graphically on scene, I guess I just flushed my publication goal for this year down the drain – - and to go from 52k to 68k in one day, tells me that I should just stick to writing smut – it’s what I’m good at =P

Incubus: Fear the Night!

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I hit 65,000 words!!!! (NaNoWriMo)

Tuesday, November 17, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I’m here. I can’t believe it! I actually reached 65k!!! Well, after last night, yeah, I really can’t believe it.

Last night I was at 52k, and was complaining on one of the other threads about how my plot had just pretty much up and died and I had nothing left to write about. It just fizzled and went out like a wet candle, at 50k. I spent the rest of the week adding about 200 words per day via editing, and fruitless attempts at plot twists. Nothing worked. It was dead.

Than some one on the thread I was commenting on, asked “Why not start a second novel to finish the month out with?” That was around 10PM.

Well, why not. I’ve got like 500 plot ideas kicking around in my notebooks, you’d think I could fine SOMETHING to write about. So, I grabbed a plot I wanted to write before, but tossed aside thinking it was too controversial a subject to publish. But I really, really, really, wanted to write it anyways. So, I figure, what the heck, I’ll write and and who knows, maybe I’ll find a publisher for it, later.

And than, wow – I was off like a race horse! I wrote 3,000 words before midnight! WOW! That must be like a record in speed writing, for me – 3k in under 2 hours. I never write that fast. (I must really have wanted to write this thin, more than I thought I did!)

Than, first think this morning I jump out f bed and start typing. It was like November 1st all over again. I was on fire to write again! Yay! and than, I had 10k day today! and it’s only noon – I wonder, could this end up being my first 20k day EVER? I certainly have time to write another 10k this after noon if I sit my ass down and write as fast as I have been doing this morning.

My current record of the most words ever in a single day was 12k during the 2007 NaNoWWriMo; I’d love to beat that record, and by reaching 10k this early in the day, I think I just might! —- hoping —- I seem to be writing much faster now that I’m working on my second novel. I think I’m really getting into this plot a lot better than the first one. It’s like I’m actually becoming the characters and can get inside their heads and really just write this thing so much better than I did with my other plot.

I don’t think it’s realistic of me to try to hit 500k, (my original goal for this year) I’d need to write, what, 50k per day to get there? Oh well. I can see 100k in my grasp though, (maybe even 200k if I really push myself) so that’s where I’m aiming at now.

So far my best days this year were:

Day 6 at 10242

Day 13 at 9276 (and the day I reached 50K)

and today Day 17 so far at 10992, making today my best day of the month so far!

In the immortal words of Kermit the Frog: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Incubus: Fear the Night!

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New NaNoWriMo Novel Started & New Banner For it

Monday, November 16, 2009 · Leave a Comment

It happened. NaNoWriMo got invaded. I started writing four middle grade children’s chapter books, and I made it to 52,000 words writing them. Until today when I started writing the M rated adult one my fans have been waiting for: Incubus (You just knew I couldn’t make it through the month without writing yet another “Etiole” story!) that makes 4 NaNo’s in a row – Love Lust Madness (2006), The Ruby Hummingbird (2007), For Fear of Little Men (the 2008 nonfiction, story behind the stories about Etiole), and this year another fiction one: Incubus

Made new banner for my newly stated NaNovel:


Make your own banner at MyBannerMaker.com!

I reached 50k last week, and have been slogging along the rest of the week by adding 200 words per day via editing what I already wrote. Than today I pulled out a plot I had written out a year or so ago, and thought, “Hey! I have time to write another 50k, why not finally get the first draft of this old plot written out?” So I started writing and an hour later I had finished chapter one and was starting on chapter two. GREAT!

Technically it’s a Sci-Fi novel, about alien abductions, and based largely on personal experience. It’s sort of a fictionalized retelling of a local event that took place in my home town a few years ago. The book will be a lot like X-Files in that the MC is sort of an investigator who is going around to people’s houses. The people in question are all alien abductees, and the investigator is questioning them, as part of a book project she is writing. She’s not FBI or police or anything like that – she’s sort of a paparazzi-tabloid-journalist looking for a story.

Well, anyways, I’ve been calling my MC Annita Blake, but every time I wrote her name I thought “That sounds too familiar”. So finally I looked it up on Google, and found out that there is already a apparently VERY popular character named Anita Blake who near as I can tell is a detective who battles vampires. Well, I never heard of those books before, so I don’t know how I started using that name, maybe I heard some one mention it here on the forums or something.

OK so, I need to change my MC’s name. Anyone got any suggestions? I need a name that sounds like a strong fighting-her-way-to-the-top-in-a-man’s-career, type name, but yet still sound feminine at the same time.

She’s a female paparazzi-tabloid-journalist looking for THE story, the one that’ll give her a name in the industry. Most of the paparazzi-tabloid-journalists are men, because it’s a punch your way to the top career, where the guy with the biggest brass knuckles gets the story first. (At least in my novel’s universe). The paparazzi-tabloid-journalists are known for ruthless and tactless ways of getting their stories, and they are not above creating a hoax and photo-shopping pictures just to get on the cover of every tabloid in the super market check outs.

That’s the type of competition she is up against, but she wants to change the industry. She wants to prove that being tough doesn’t mean getting in a fist fight a stealing the other guy’s camera, because he got the shot first. She wants to make a name for herself by going after the odd ball cases that the other guys ignore as too hocky and boring. She wants to be the paparazzi-tabloid-journalist who actually gets to the bottom of the story and tells the true story behind the sensation.

So, who is she? What is her name? Can any one think of a good strong, yet still feminine name fore my paparazzi-tabloid-journalist with a mission?

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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I think my NaNoWriMo Novel Died :( Starting Over

Monday, November 16, 2009 · Leave a Comment

black birdfall leaves centerblack bird

I started out with a really good plot. I had it outlined and everything! I knew what was going to happen and when, and where, and why, and to whom. . . and than I started writing . . . I can say this is the strangest NaNovel I have ever written:

My plot about Jack Frost taking over the world turned into a Dracula meets Jack Frost fan-fic, which turned into a Choose Your Own Adventure story for kids and the kids for some odd reason went off looking to capture vampire chickens instead of going after Dracula, than they meet an FBI agent who was chasing UFOs (I had just watched X-Files that night). It got really cold and all the plants died, but Jack Frost never got there. :( I’m so side tracked now it ain’t funny.

Than for no reason at all a window washer on the 78th floor sees a murder and no one believes him, esp when he says the murderer was Dracula. No idea why I wrote that. It’s just there in the middle of my novel for no reason at all!

Another character jumped in for no reason at all, pulled up a soapbox, and went off on a 9,000 word rant about why vampires are not romance heroes, don’t glitter, and are bloodthirsty murderous monsters. Than Liberace ran by – glittering concert pianist by day, blood sucking sparkling vampire by night.

And than just when I thought my story could not possibly get any weirder: another guy shows up and wakes up one morning to find his roof gone, and that vampires who are allergic to rancid yak butter (thank you DARES thread!) had stolen his roof for I have no idea why. (That section was so absolutely utterly ridiculous that I posted it as my NaNovel excerpt on my profile, if you want to read it.)

I got to get this thing back on track, but I don’t think the rush of NaNoWriMo is the right time to do it. This thing needs some heavy duty editing if it’s going to be saved. Or maybe I should publish it as it is, and call it some sort of a surreal dream scape novel? LOL!

Finally, tonight, I decided the whole thing had gone so far off track, that I needed to put it away and try a different plot, so, now I’m starting a new novel about an Incubus attack on a secluded fishing village. Teenage girls are having demon babies and the main character is a tabloid journalist that’s investigating the girls’ claims that the father is an Incubus. Let’s see if my NaNovel 2009 Take 2, stays on track any better than Take 1 did.

What in the world happened to my plot? Any body else have a plot that ran away from them and are now starting over with another one? Any one got any advice on how to prevent this same thing from happening to my second plot?

Incubus: Fear the Night!

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NaNoWriMo RE: Writing in 2nd Person POV

Sunday, November 15, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Are any of you writing in 2nd person? If so, what have you found to be the biggest challenge about writing in this uncommon POV?

———-

[/quote]

Out side of a game book (aka a Choose Your Own Adventure book) second person does not go over well, with either readers or publishers. It’s hard to read, if you are just reading it for the sake of reading it. It’s extremely difficult to write well, and is considered a “lazy form” of writing when used outside of a game book. The term “lazy form” is used to describe a style of writing that is pretty easy to write, but is hard to read or understand, resulting in the reader thinking the author was “too lazy” to bother to write something better. (First person, is also considered a “lazy form” of writing as well.)

Unless you are really, really, really, really good at English Grammar, and I mean college professor good, it’s VERY hard to write second person AND come out sounding grammatically correct.

That said, when it is well written, it makes for a very fast read, and draws the reader right into the book.

Pretty much every book on these lists is written in second person. I read most of them, but, most of them came out in the 1970’s so that tells you how long ago I read them. I can’t remember if they had dialog in them or not.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gamebook

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_gamebooks

I recommend you try finding a few of these books via inter-library-loan and scan through them to see how other authors handled second person.

If you are writing something which you plan to publish, I would advise against second person, because most publishers toss every second person manuscript that comes across their desk, with out reading it. Unless it’s a game book, you will have an extremely hard time finding a publisher and will have to resort to self publishing it yourself. But if publishing is not your goal or it is a game book you are writing, than go ahead and write in second person, because it can’t hurt to try.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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NaNoWriMo RE: First Person Tense Issues!

Sunday, November 15, 2009 · Leave a Comment

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The question:

First Person Tense Issues!

[quote=Adjective]“Okay, yeah I was really thin. I had kids that randomly walked up to me and asked me if I was anorexic. But I ate really badly. I should be morbidly obese, but I’m not, I just have a super fast metabolism. Which people say is good, but you are always hungry and you always have to pee. 

Then again, I like being able to eat whatever I want whenever I want and even if I didn’t get any exercise; I would still look like this. “

Do you want to COUNT how many times I switched tenses in that paragraph! Which one do I use? It’s not *really* a retelling of anything, so present? But aren’t they usually in past?

AHHH!

———-

Photobucket

[/quote]

My answer:

[quote=Adjective]“Okay, yeah I was really thin. I had kids that randomly walked up to me and asked me if I was anorexic. But I ate really badly. I should be morbidly obese, but I’m not, I just have a super fast metabolism. Which people say is good, but you are always hungry and you always have to pee.
Then again, I like being able to eat whatever I want whenever I want and even if I didn’t get any exercise; I would still look like this. “
[/quote]

One thing stood out to me:

But I ate really badly.

Badly means – to be doing something that is bad, wicked, or otherwise criminal — in other words she is eating while getting ready to rob the bank;

or to not do something well, to do it poorly — in other words she rarely eats at all and may go days with out food, which seems to be the opposite of what you are intending to say here.

This implies that your character is some sort of evil villain because s/he eats something or that she does not eat anything at all. Changing the word “badly” to a word such as “a lot”, “more than I should”, etc. will sound much better and make more sense.

For example:

But I could never stop eating.

But I ate so much more than I should.

But I ate a lot, really, I did.

But I ate like a horse. I just couldn’t get enough food.

Each of those not only reads better, but it actually means that your character is over eating, not getting ready to rob a bank or hiding in a closet not eating for days on end.

Your excerpt would sound better like this:

Past:

    “Okay, yeah I was really thin. Kids would randomly walk up to me and asked me if I was anorexic. But I ate so much more than I should. I should have been morbidly obese, but I wasn’t. I just had a super fast metabolism. People say that is good, but I was always hungry and I always had to pee. Then again, I liked being able to eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted and even if I didn’t get any exercise; I would still be thin. ”

. . . OR . . .

Present:

    “Okay, yeah I’m really thin. I have kids randomly walk up to me and ask me if I’m anorexic. But I eat a lot, really, I do. I should be morbidly obese, but I’m not. I just have a super fast metabolism. People say that is good, but I’m always hungry and I always have to pee. Then again, I like being able to eat whatever I want, whenever I want and even if I don’t get any exercise; I can still look like this. ”

Yes, it does make a difference which you use in your story and where you us it.

In the past tense, your character sounds like an adult reminiscing about her teen years, and mournfully wishing she was as thin as she was so many years ago..

Whereas in the present tense, she sounds like a 14 year old trying to justify her physical appearance to a school guidance counselor, who has just told her she needed to see a psychiatrist to find out why she isn’t eating.

Changing the tenses, changed the reader’s mental image of the girl. In one tense she is a young girl, while in the other tense she is and older woman. In one tense she was speaking in self defense, in the other she was thinking about things that happened years ago.

So, is your story about a teenage speaking about this past week, or a woman talking about way back when? That will determine which tense you are writing here.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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NaNoWriMo RE: Multiple pronouns – how do you keep them straight? (Dialog Tags)

Sunday, November 15, 2009 · Leave a Comment

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Multiple pronouns – how do you keep them straight?

[quote=terraluft]Help! I constantly have several characters in the same place at the same time. How do you talk about two female characters using ’she’ without getting them all confused? I hate having to use their names or how they are related to my MC because it doesn’t seem to flow as well as using the pronouns. And maybe the best answer is “don’t worry about it because that’s what the editing phase is for” applies? I have a tendency to obsess about things like this sidetracking me into “edit as I go” mode and I swore this year I wouldn’t do that. But, I keep getting hung up on this one area. Someone tell me how you do it and save me from myself?

[/quote]

I have three male MCs in mine.

I can’t think of how to explain what I do, so I’ll just copy a section from a scene that has all three of them talking to each other, so you can see how I do it:

[quote=EelKat]
The downstairs phone was ringing. “Answer the phone!” Zeb yelled, “I can’t find my pants.”

Xavier ran out of the bathroom, rubbing his wet hair with a towel.

The door bell rang. “Answer the door!” Zeb called from upstairs. “I still haven’t found my pants. Why haven’t you answered the phone yet?”

“Answer the phone. Answer the door. Can’t find your pants. I was in the shower you know.” Zeb wasn’t listening and Xavier knew it. By the time Xavier had gotten a bathrobe on, thrown a towel over his red hair, run down the stairs and reached the phone, it had stopped ringing. “Probably just a telemarketer anyways,” he muttered as he stumbled towards to door. It was Azreal, a tall skinny kid from down the road.

“Thought you guys were supposed to meet me by the creek,” he pointed to his watch, indicating that they were late once again.

“Yeah, I know, the alarm didn’t go off and Zeb lost his pants.”

“Lost his pants? How’d that happen?” Azreal walked in and made his way to the kitchen.

“Don’t know. His mom probably threw them in the laundry.” Xavier was Zeb’s cousin. He was visiting for the year while his parents went on some adventuring trip. Xavier never knew for certain what it was his parents did exactly. Paparazi reporters, is what the kids at school called them. Whatever. They were never home and Xavier ended up spending most of his months bunking out at his cousin Zeb’s house.

Azreal opened the fridge, “Why is there an old penny wedged behind the cheddar?”

“Azreal!” Zeb came down the stairs.

“I hate cheese.” Azreal was still poking around in the fridge.
[/quote]

uhm, yeah. That’s how I do it. Not sure if that helps you out or not. I don’t really use pronoun as dialog tags much.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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NaNoWriMo RE: What is the difference between writing scenes and chapters?

Sunday, November 15, 2009 · Leave a Comment

NaNoWriMo RE: What is the difference between writing scenes and chapters?

[quote=Aisling23]I realize there can be several scenes in a chapter, but still
the arc of change can happen in both and can a long scene be called a chapter?

what most differentiates scene and chapter?

thank you
I’m writing very long scenes or chapters; I am not sure which….
———-

http://www.symbolicbridging.com/
http://www.aislingnano.wordpress.com/

[/quote]

A chapter has a beginning, a middle, and an end. A scene does not.

The beginning = scene #1
The middle = scene #2
The end = scene #3

Chapters ALWAYS have a minimum of three scenes.

Chapters are made out of scenes.

Every time your character does something a new scene starts. For example:

    scene #1 – your character wakes up
    scene #2 – your character gets out of bed
    scene #3 – your character brushes teeth
    scene #4 – character walks to kitchen
    scene #5 – character pours cereal in bowl
    scene #6 – character eats cereal
    scene #7 – character puts on shoes
    scene #8 – character walks to school

    and so on and so forth

These scenes, when strung together, make a chapter.

A chapter is several paragraphs and possibly many pages long.

A scene is rarely more than one or two paragraphs, or ten or twelve sentences at the most. Longer scenes are extraordinarily rare.

A novel well have hundreds, possibly thousands of scenes in it, but will only have 15 to 20 chapters.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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What is it and why would you pick it? (Need some NaNoWriMo plot choices help)

Saturday, November 14, 2009 · Leave a Comment

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So, I flew through to 50k without any trouble, mostly because I was writing very fast with out stopping to think about where my plot was heading. I just wrote the first thing that popped into my head. As a result I now have a ton of random not really connected scenes, involving 3 kids (about 10 or 12 years old, I think.) who believe their new neighbor is a vampire. Though the scenes are all on the same theme, they do not connect well, into a coherent story. So, I still have a ways to go before this story is finished and thus I am continuing to write through to November 30th.
Then I had an idea. If I change my book into a Choose Your Own Adventure type novel, I would have a way to connect all these random scenes into a logical story. With that in mind I and now writing up random choices to place at the end of my scenes.
Here’s where you guys come in and where I need your help. I just wrote this:
    EelKat wrote:

    Zeb wanted to pick the blue one. Azreal thought we should pick the emerald green one. Xavier liked the look of the red one best, but thought it would be best if we left them all alone and just went back the way we came. Since there were three choices and four of you, Zeb, Azreal, and Xavier now looked at you to decide.

    If you decide to pick the crimson red one, turn to page 46.
    If you decide to pick the sapphire blue one, turn to page 78.
    If you decide to pick the emerald green one, turn to page 100.
    If you think it’s a trap and want to try to go back the way you came, turn page 56.
It’s another scene not connected to any others, I really like the idea of them having to choose one of three colored objects, but I have no idea what the objects are. And now I have to connect this scene to my other scenes, but in order to do that I need to figure out a few things first.
    1) Where are they? Why are they there?
    2) What are these three colored objects that they have found?
    3) Which option would you pick and why?
    4) Any thoughts on what might happen as a result of each choice?
Any ideas would be really helpful. Thanks!

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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Tips for Writing Fast-Paced Scenes

Saturday, November 14, 2009 · Leave a Comment

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Tips for Writing Fast-Paced Scenes

[quote=Banespawn]Short sentences/paragraphs will read faster than longer ones. [/quote]

That’s what I always tell folks.

    If you look at a lot of the bestsellers out there, and start counting words, you will find most have seven words or less per sentence!

    OR

    Take a look at the bestsellers. Count the words per sentence. Most have seven words or less.

Notice how one long sentence became three? But both gave the same advice. The first sentence was confusing to read. It slows the reader down. The second set was easier to digest. The reader could read it faster.

==================================================

You want fast pace? Try this: Dialog, Dialog, Dialog, BAM, Narrative, Dialog, Dialog, Dialog

Uh-huh, yep, that’s right. The fastest way to pick up the pace and speed up the action is to let your characters talk and talk and talk and talk. Not one character monologing his fool head off. Get four or five characters in the scene and have them speaking one sentence at a time, back and forth.

[quote=Genuine]I swear I could write straight dialogue for hours, but here’s what my writing looks like. I have lots of dialogue, and giant paragraphs here or there. It’s the talking head syndrome. And it is not good when my characters feel like they’re talking inside a Giant White Room of Nothingness! Here’s an example

The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing.

Person1: Blah, blah, bler, fleeble

Person2: BLAH? Dooble!

Person1: Dooble, dooble, dooble.

Person2: Tubbyblubby flur

Person1: Fla, fla, flah

Person1: Blah, blah, bler, fleeble

Person2: BLAH? Dooble!

Person1: Dooble, dooble, dooble.

Person2: Tubbyblubby flur

Person1: Fla, fla, flah

The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing. The sun swept radiant rays of burblebobble across the quaint scene of XYZ, and the clouds burst into fleecing.
———-
[/quote]

LOL! What a great post! It was like reading Keith Laumer’s Retief series!

Though I write short stories and novels as well, my main writing base is comics. I’m used to reading and writing comics. In other words I am used to write straight dialog, and nothing but dialog. I can write dialog for hours on end. Have characters chatting away, verbalizing everything that they are seeing, hearing, doing, and thinking.

It’s all that straight up dialog that causes comic books to be such fast paced stories.

==================================================

[quote=Banespawn]Don’t stop to descibe things. Make the descriptions part of the action.[/quote]

Yep. I say this all the time too.

You could say:

    He walked past the tree.

I’d say:

    He walked past the willow tree.

I only added one little word. That’s it. But it changed the whole picture in the readers head. Nothing big. Just little things. Of course I could also say:

    He walked past the giant, green, weeping willow tree were Billy carved his name way back in 2056.

But that is just too long and wordy, and adds details that do not move the story forward.

Keep it short, keep it simple, keep it familiar, let the reader interpret the minor details themselves, and you’ll write a book that’s easy to read and seems familar to your readers, even if it’s a fictional world lightyears from the earth.

I sit here thinking about the beautiful purple sunsets sending rays of light across the green grassy hills and listening to the sound of pretty blue feathered song birds as they sing their songs of . . . YAWN . . . .

So when is the story going to start? Or when are we going to get back to the characters? Or, you know, when are we going to do something, ANYTHING? A few phrases of flowery descriptions scattered in here and there between dialog is fine, but when you start writing page after page after page of descriptions, I start falling asleep.

There should be dialog on every page. More than 50% (maybe even 75%) of your book should be dialog.(Ask any editor or publisher what makes a bestseller a best seller and they’ll tell you it’s all about the dialog). The remaining should be largely action.

You can tell me that on your planet the trees are blue, but don’t tell me the entire biology lesson on the hows and why of the tree being blue. So it’s blue. That great! Now get on with the action. What else is the character doing besides noticing that the trees are blue? Is there someone hiding behind the blue tree? Why did the character tell me the tree was blue? Why purpose does the blue tree have in your plot? I’m not a botanist, I don’t need to know what every plant on your planet looks like and why it looks that way – all I care about is what your MC is doing.

Less prose – more action.

Less prose – more dialog.

Give me a fast read, don’t slow me down with flowery purple prose.

==================================================

But than: What about fight scenes? you ask. Well, what about them? Have you ever seen a REAL fight? A real fight only lasts a few seconds. You’d be hard pressed to find a real fight that lasted longer than 30 seconds. What you see in the movies? That’s just for effect. A real fight is never anything like what you see in the movies.

    A punch. A whack. A quick shuffle in the mud. And than it’s over.

I figure it should take the reader no more than 5 seconds to read the fight. Thus my fight scenes tend to be quick and short. Heck, you just read one of them!

What about epic battles for fantasy or military fiction? Regardless of how many people are fighting, (even if it’s a big battle) I pick out only two fighters, and focus on them. I describe the actual action between the two fighters, focusing more on the inner emotional responce of the one that is loseing, (even if they are not a MC) thus makeing the winning fighter seem much more feirce. Usually I focus more on the pain from the blow, than the actual blow itself.

Generally my fight scenes are less than three paragraphs long. I use short sentences (most less than seven words each, often only 2 words each). I use simple small words. I let it flow past the reader quickly, giving them the illusion that they are being pulled through the action at the same break neck speed in which the action takes place.

[quote=Esteleth]
They could hear the evidence of a struggle downstairs: shuffling then running footfalls, a chase, a muffled scream, the pushing around of furniture, the breaking of a vase, thuds, curses, their mother’s voice rising up in a shrill teary scream…[/quote]

Actually, this would read faster if you had done this:

    They could hear the struggle downstairs. The shuffling. The footfalls. The chase. A muffled scream. The furniture pushed aside. A vase breaking.

    THUD!

    CRASH!

    Some one cursed.

    Their mother’s voice rose up. A shrill scream . . .

Long run on sentences always slow the readers down. Every time you put a comma some where, go back and see if you can change in into a period.

Also, you are using way to many prepositions. In an action scene the fewer prepositions, the better. None is best. Prepositions slow the pace. Cut them out whenever possible.

Take this writer’s advice to heart:
[quote=havocfett]Write short. Write Choppy. Write dynamic. Don’t stay on one thing. Move quickly through the scene.[/quote]

Short and choppy wins the race when it comes to action and fast pace. Don’t be afraid of fragments. Forget your English teacher. Fragments are your friend. Slice and dice every run on sentence. Turn as many comas as possible into periods.

But remember – only do this for you fast paced action scenes. You don’t want a book of nothing but short and choppy! Your descriptions scenes should have longer sentences, that tire your reader out and make them want to stop and take a deep breath. (But not so many that you put them to sleep!)

You want to mix it up and keep things interesting. Like a roller coaster, your plot should have slow moving ups, and fast moving downs, back and forth through out the entire book.

[quote=wynnie.the.poooh]
3. If it’s a killing spree, kill people. Mention them, their side in the battle and then BLAM!
4. Use a lot of action sounds. BLAM! makes you think of a firing gun. SPLAT! makes you think of something hitting the ground. With a splat. This is actually a phenomenon (the use of words as nouns that sound like the sound they are naming).[/quote]

    BLAM! SPLAT! SOCK! PUNCH!

    Holy Rusted Drain Pipes, Batman, it’s the Penguin!

    BAM! THUD! SQUISH! BOOM!

    Great Scott, Batman! You got him!

Yep, take a cue from Batman – Single word action sentences will move your story along much faster than 10 pages of description ever could!

==================================================

And here’s something that I don’t see any one mentioning yet, but when you start preaching and lecturing and pushing a cause, it really slows down your pace a lot. The last thing any author wants to hear from their readers is: I’m Not Stupid – Don’t Talk Down To Me and Preach at Me!

In other words:

Don’t waste an entire chapter telling me why lions live in Africa and Tigers live in China. If I wanted to know that, I’d have looked for it on Wikipedia.

Don’t spend 3 pages telling me the symptoms of cancer. Tell me your MC has cancer and move on to how she deals with it. If I want to know the symptoms and details of treatment, I’ll read a medical journal.

Okay, so maybe I don’t know where Yorkshireville Town is. If I want to know, I’ll look it up on Google Earth, I don’t need you to give detailed directions. I’m not planning on a trip there, I just want to read your novel.

Remember that you are writing a story not a dictionary. You are writing a story not a medical journal. You are writing a story not a travel guide. You are writing a story. Stop explaining every thing to me and just tell the story! Don’t act like I’m a retard and stop the story to explain everything. I’m smarter than you think. I know what you mean, and if I don’t know, I know how to look it up and find out for myself. Just stick with the story and nothing but the story. Stop talking down to me like I’m a little kid who don’t know nothing!

You got a chip on your shoulder? You got a cause to promote? You got an issue to protest? You want to save my soul from hell by getting me to join your church? Write a pamphlet and hand it out on the streets – build a web site – start a blog – do something to tell people about it, but don’t take it out on me your reader! Sure, maybe I will agree with you, maybe I’ll want to support your cause too, but there is a right way and a wrong way to get supporters, and strategically lacing your novel with preaching and lectures is the WRONG way to do it! Just stick with the story and nothing but the story. Stop preaching to me like I’m the enemy!

By removing every thing from your writing that makes it sound like a dictionary, encyclopedia, or church manual, you will do wonders to speed up the pace.
All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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My 30 Year Search For One of the world’s rarest books continues – PLEASE notify me if you know where I can find a copy of this extrodinaily rare book!!!!!

Saturday, November 14, 2009 · Leave a Comment

My 30 Year Search For One of the world’s rarest books continues – PLEASE notify me if you know where I can find a copy of this extrodinaily rare book!!!!!

Anyone remember The Tailypo A Ghost Story by the Galdons?

Well, there was another book, very similar, both in story and in illustrations, it was maybe 30 or 40 pages long; a picture book for slightly older children. I lost it when I was 6 years old, meaning it was published prior to 1979.

The story started out with a boy walking in the woods, when he sees a hand floating by. He runs after it, going deeper into the woods. Soon he hears a woman screaming “My hand! My hand! Has any one seen my hand?” He takes the hand too her. From there the story is like a very gruesome version of Hansel and Gretal.

The ghost captures the boy and takes him to a house built out of bones, held together with blood. She ends up feeding him to her pet wolf. The boy spends a few days inside the wolf (very gruesome illustrations, done in black and white pen and ink), watching tv (the wolf eat a TV too).

Some how the boy escapes but I forget the rest of the book.

The illustrations in the book were a style very similar to the Galdons. They were drawn in black ink and charcoal and had a quick cross-hatch style. The only colors in the book were a few random touches of turquoise blue and bright red.

The cover on the edition I had (and probably the only edition ever made) was pitch black, with turquoise skeletal looking spooky trees, it looked as though you were looking down into the forest.

The book, as I recall (I was only 4 when I got it) though it was sold for ages 5 – 8 ,caused quite a stir when it was published, due to it’s extremely graphic YA nature and my understanding was that due to parent protests, book stores sent it back to the publisher and nearly every copy of it was shredded, resulting in it becoming one of the rarest books to exist.

It was my favorite book, along with The Tailypo (yes, I was a morbid child, Vincent Price was my fave actor when I was 2 – drove my parents crazy with my abnormally early obsession with horror genre.) I do not know what happened to my copy of this book. All I know is one day I came home from school and it was gone, never to be seen again, it was a common occurance for my books to be thrown into the woodstove whenever my parents got angry with me, and I assume that was the fate that befell my beloved “Book of the Bones” as I referred to it, and I’ve spent 30 years trying to find another copy of it. The problem is I know neither the name nor the author of this strange gruesome picture book.

I’ve been putting this request all over the internet since 1997, every year I leave this request on this NaNoWriMo Thread, and to date, no one has been able to help me. No one can remember this super rare book.

If any one remembers this book and knows either the title and/or author PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE let me know! NaNoMail me if you have any info about this book. Thank you!

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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Just reached 50,000 words for NaNoWriMo on Friday the 13th!

Friday, November 13, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I hit 50k!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And on Friday the 13th no less!

My last paragraph written is:

    Vampire chickens don’t look like ordinary chickens. Their faces are pale and grey instead of bright and red. Their beaks are a gleaming ivory color instead of a nice golden yellow, and the upper beak is long and sharp and curves downward growing into a sharp fang like point.

*beaks* was the 50,000th word.

And now off to write some more – I want to see how close I can get to 500k before the end of the month. :)

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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Words I Use During NaNoWriMo

Friday, November 13, 2009 · Leave a Comment

My word processor tells me how many times I have used each word. Here are my top 10 most used words:

the = 1886
to = 1124
and = 1113
a = 992
I = 938
of = 854
in = 634
it = 632
they = 547
that = 516

I was surprised to see “I” there, since my book is in third person not first person, though it is pretty heavy on the dialog.

My top 10 least used words (each used only once) are:

cranky
complaint
attend
sunrise
vacation
planned
exploring
mansion
rubbing
rang

I also found that have used these words the following times:

vampires = 208
vampire = 194
Dracula = 123
blood = 113
night = 68
garlic = 48
coffin = 43
seventy-eighth-floor = 42
dark = 35
undead = 34
rancid-yak-butter = 32
hell = 23
terrified = 26
scared = 26
bathroom = 25
neck = 25
afraid = 24
vamps = 24
feet = 23
vamp = 23
black = 23
kill = 23
red = 22
humans = 19
bit = 19
nightmares = 18
fear = 18
death = 17
strawberry = 15
monsters = 13
bite = 13
spectacularly = 13
victims = 13
died = 12
children = 12
poison = 11
fangs = 11
strange = 10
bats = 10
socks = 10
creepy = 9
grave = 9
zombie = 9
chocolate = 9
closet = 8
wolves = 8
Maine = 8
horrible = 7
darkness = 7
Pop-Tarts = 7
flesh = 7
sunlight = 7
interesting = 6
basement = 6
shadow = 6
horror = 6
corpse = 6
Pop-Tart = 6
creeps = 5
reflection = 5
salt = 4
mysterious = 4
clown = 4
walrus = 4
ghosts = 4
spiders = 4
creature = 4
drained = 4
paler = 4
sparkling = 4
Transylvania = 4
sequined = 4
zombies = 4
moonlight = 4
spork = 4
graveyard = 4
thirteen = 3
NaNoWriMo = 3
bleeding = 3
moose = 3
clowns = 3
beach = 3
ghost = 3
unnatural =3
octopus = 3
mosquitoes = 3
killer = 3
mists = 3
sparkled = 3
glittering = 3
bloodless = 3
vampirism = 3
mirrors = 3
bleed = 3
horrified = 2

I’ll bet you can tell from that list I’m writing about vampires. You think? And even though the words sparkle, sparkling, glitter, and glittering are on that list, no my vampires do not sparkle. One of my characters wears sequined suits. =P

It says that out of 43,188 total words I used 42,969 unique words. uhm, yeah, my spelling is pretty bad, so once it’s spell-checked in December, it’ll probably be more like I used 2,000 unique words. =P LOL!

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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NaNoWriMo RE: Canada vs. America

Thursday, November 12, 2009 · Leave a Comment

black birdfall leaves centerblack bird

Canada vs. America

[quote=Clockwork Smith]One of my main characters is a 14 year old Canadian (probably lived around the Toronto area) who just moved to America. I am trying to think of things that he might miss. I am drawing up a blank. Tell me about the differences between Canada and America if you would be so kind. Or just tell me about Canada.


The novel is set in the present day. What might his favorite sports team be? If you could tell me about different big cities in Canada, I would really appreciate it. I don’t know if I even want him to be from Toronto or not. Would a fourteen year old be allowed to rde the subway by himself? Etc.


Answering any of these questions will help me greatly. Thank you.


[/quote]

I’m going to agree with every one who’s saying it depends on where in America they move to. I’m also pretty shocked at nearly every answer on this thread, because I’ve lived in America my whole life and I’ve never heard of half the things these people are answering you with. Funny thing is, I know everything the Canadians are answering you with. Could it be that Maine is more like Canada than it is like the rest of America?

I’m wondering why everyone keeps saying Canadians would miss Tim Horton’s – they are close to being on as many corners in America as Starbucks is – pretty much every street in every town has at least one of each – and I hate both of them btw.

[quote=Moondragon]noticed some differences in speech:

They say Natives; we say Native Americans (Well, I guess Native Canadian is a bit of a mouthful!)
[/quote]

Well I guess that just depends on where in America you are than, because in Maine, we say Natives too.

And I live in Old Orchard Beach – we get 2 million tourists every summer. Most of the one’s from Canada talk no different than the locals. Here in Maine, we have a really hard time understand what folks from the lower 47 are saying, esp if they are from New York or Utah, and we often ask them to repeat themselves several times before we finally figure out what they are talking about. New Yorkers and Utah folk are the absolute worst, it’s like even though they are speaking English, it’s so far from being the English I know, that it’s like they are speaking a completely different language.

For instance in Maine we say Soda, in Utah they say Pop.

We say Roof, they Raouuuuuf (like it was 3 syllables not 1)

We say Brook, they say Crick

We say Cougar, they say Mountain Lions.

We say Sleeping Bag, they say Sleeping Sack.

We say Sex, they say Shag

We shake hands and say “Good morning how are you doing?” they say “Yo Dude, wassup?” and slap you on the back.

You try to shake hands with a Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian and they jump back and look at you like they have never seen a handshake before, but around here that’s how every body greats every body – and I’m told it’s a “very French Canadian/Quebec thing to do”.

Another thing Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian folks complain about us Maine folk doing and say it is a “very French Canadian/Quebec thing to do” is the way we eat. In Maine, a meal could take an hour or two or three – we prefer to actually sit down and enjoy our food. (Which I suppose is why you can go 10 or 12 towns before you see a McDonald’s) We tend to eat at home or eat at restaurants, rather than at fast food joints. The Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian tourists though? They get all upset and act like it’s the end of the world if you haven’t scarfed down your food like some sort of rabid animal. They are always in a rush to eat in 5 minutes or less and than rush off to the next thing. . . and than they leave half their food on their plates! I say once again – HOW RUDE!

We say Hood, they say “That Thingamabop there on the front of the car, you know I mean, that thing, right there, that” and they start RUDELY snapping their fingers inches from your noise with one hand while pointing to the hood of their car with the other hand.

And WHAT is it with the really RUDE and ill mannered way that New Yorkers NEVER SHUT UP and keep snapping their fingers in your face when they talk to you? (Utah folks wag their index finger and they DO sometimes hit you in the noise because they get so damn RUDELY close to you when they talk)

Our chowder is white and has fish and corn in it, their chowder is red and has tomatoes and pasta in it . (Chowder by the way MEANS “White Stew”, so technically any soup that is NOT white is NOT chowder)

Us Native Mainers (a Native Mainer being a person whose family has been in Main for a minimum of 5 generations and -yes- leaving Maine for a few years to go to a NonMaine college will get you branded as a Non-Mainer) are constantly amazed by the Out-of-Staters that move in here because they love Maine, but than bitch and moan a few months later because it’s too much like Canada. Well, did they ever look at a map?

My over all impression of the lower 47 is that they are fast talking rude busy bodies. The tourists who come here are often quick to say they love coming to Maine because it’s like going to a different country without the need for a passport or because it’s “Like going to Canada with out going through customs”.

[quote=MichelleZB]What I notice when I go to the States is that people don’t know the little verbal dance of politeness most Canadians do. Buying gum from an American corner store, I’ll look the clerk in the eye as he gives me my change and say, “Thank you so much,” or just “Thanks!” And they usually have no idea what to say back. I usually get a look of shock and an “Uh-huh, ” or a “Yup!” Both of those responses sound weird to my Canadian ears.

I don’t think it’s because Americans aren’t polite. I think they just don’t have the catchphrases we do. And Canadians aren’t particularly polite. I just say “Thanks” because I’m used to it. I don’t even hear the “You’re very welcome” or “No problem” they say in response. It sounds too normal to register.[/quote]

I completely agree. I worked in retail for 17 years and the Non-Mainers/Non-Canadian tourists that I meet have no manners or etiquette skills whatsoever! Every time I meet someone who acts rude at the register, I’ll ask “So how are liking Maine so far?” and they’ll get stunned and shocked that I could tell they were a tourist! LOL! They are completely clueless!

You are right, I don’t think they are intentionally being rude, I don’t think they are even aware that they are among the rudest folks I’ve ever encountered. They completely have no idea that they are acting rude in any way at all! The fact that they are so completely clueless as to how rude they are, always amazes me!

From what I can see though, from the Non-Mainers/Non-Canadian tourists I’ve meet and dealt with over the years, I think the problem is that they are always in a hurry. They have to rush in the store and rush back out in 5 seconds flat otherwise the whole world will blow up – I mean, that’s how I see it. I mean look at the way they eat! Scarf the food down in under 10 minutes and than they are out of there. No time to sit and relax. No time to enjoy their food. No time to just look out the window and think about life. No time to . . heck, they don’t even have time to look at their watch and see what time it is! OMG!

I look at these folks and I wonder, what’s the rush? Where’s the fire? Why are they running around like half crazed mad men all the time? Sometimes I ask them why they are in such a hurry, and it’s never a for a good reason, either. It’s not, my wife’s in labor and I have to get to the hospital so no time to eat. No. It’s the game is on and I gotta get to the bar and watch it with the boys. I’m like really? That’s important? How?

So my conclusion is, that it’s not that they are rude because they lack manners, they are rude because they (supposedly) lack the time to be considerate.

But hey, time is what you make of it, so if you lack time, maybe what you really lack is management of your life.

[quote=Laura Rainbow Dragon]
Guns are a biggie. Canadians don’t carry them. We don’t feel that we should or that our neighbours should or that common citizens should have a right to. This is not true of all Canadians, of course. There are some who wish to carry guns, and there are some people (police officers, hunters, etc.) who are legally licensed to possess a gun (and there are some criminals who carry one illegally) but this is a minority opinion in Canada. If your character is a city boy, there’s a good chance he’s never seen a gun in real life — and seeing one in a friend’s house/car could freak him right out. (Plus, if you move him into a community in which possession of guns by the citizenry is commonplace, this could freak his parents out. They might forbid him to go into the homes of kids whose parents kept guns in the house, for instance.)
[/quote]

That’s another thing – EVERY ONE in Maine walks around with a shot gun or rifle, usually every where they go. Men. Women, Children. If they don’t have it on them, they’ve got it sitting on the seat of their car. Non-Mainer tourists get all freaked out about it when they see folks walk into a store carrying a rifle. It’s kind of weird, cause they act like the guy is going to shoot up the store or something when all he was doing was stopping in the buy a case of drinks for his hunting buddies – hell, the store owner usually has a rifle sitting under the counter. I never understood why the Non-Mainer tourists freak out like that when they see folks carrying rifles. It’s pretty weird, I mean, you’d think they never saw a gun before! Can’t say I’ve ever heard of Canadians doing this (carrying guns every where), I can’t recall ever seeing a Canadian carrying a gun before, but they don’t get all freaked out over it the way the Non-Mainer tourists do.

[quote=Laura Rainbow Dragon]

In Canada, when we enter a person’s home (our own, or someone else’s), we remove our shoes at the door.

[/quote]

We do this in Maine too, and it’s another thing that Non-Mainers/Non-Canadian tourists get all bitchy about. . . I’m mean, really, really, REALLY bitchy about it too. You ask them to take off their shoes and you’d think we just said we wanted to cut their feet off! OMG! They start flipping out talking about germs and getting their feet dirty and freaking out like I don’t know what! Again, more rudeness. Boy, do the Non-Mainers/Non-Canadian tourists act like a bunch of winy spoiled brats sometimes – no all the time. They complain about everything. EVERYTHING! It’s too hot, it’s too cold

And than there’s cell phones. You are lucky if you can get cell phone reception in most places in Maine. Pretty much only York & Cumberland county have cellphone access, outside of York county, heck, tough luck getting a land line, let alone cell phone! But the Non-Mainers/Non-Canadian tourists don’t realize this until they get here, and boy oh boy you should here them howl! You’d think their entire family had just been killed in a plane crash or something the way they moan and groan and bitch and complain and go on and on and on about how they can’t live without their cellphone!

[quote=swenson]
Also, many people not from Quebec do not like the people from Quebec. Quebec get some specific privileges over other provinces (oh, there’s another thing- provinces in Canada, states in the US) because they are primarily French. For example, the official language is French (not English). Quebecers are viewed (at least by people from Ontario, which is where my knowledge comes from) as being kind of full of themselves, kind of like how a lot of people in the Midwest (like Michigan!) would call people from out East “full of themselves”.

Most people in Ontario would probably have learned French in school, so if they aren’t exactly fluent, they know a fair bit.

(by the way, my knowledge all comes from having relatives and close friends in Canada, as well as traveling there several times!)[/quote]

Yep, same with Maine. Most folks in Maine are French, speak French, act French and would rather hob-knob with Quebec folks than the lower 47.

Do you realize that EVERY YEAR Maine and Quebec join forces and try to recede The Union/Canada? Why? Because once upon a time Quebec was it’s own country. (and it was not that long ago either, some of the old folks are old enough to remember that – Maine is was of the last States to join the Union after all) Than America chopped off Maine and Canada adsorbed Quebec.

Maine HATES the rest of America and we Mainers are not afraid to tell every Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian tourist as much, of course, a lot of Non-Mainer/Non-Canadians tell us they hate Maine too, so the animosity is mutual. And from what I hear Quebec folks say, they pretty much hate the rest of Canada and the rest of Canada hates them. (a lot of Quebec folks shop here in Maine and visit Maine on the weekends) (Maine is not really connected to the rest of the Union, we are smack dab in the middle of Quebec only connected to the USA by a small sliver on the west side.)

Keep in mind here that though Maine is part of America, geographically speaking, we are farther North on the map that a large portion of populated Canada. Many people think “America” (in reference to Canada) and think warmer, souther, but they forget to think about Maine and Alaska – both North and colder.

[quote=ohmynoti]
-all packaging in canada is printed in both french and english. consequently, when i look at american packaging, i often feel like it’s missing something. (in other matters, some provinces are more bilingual than others — + there are substantial french-speaking populations outside of quebec. for example, i live in new brunswick right now, which has a large acadian population. but packaging is bilingual across the country. so even an anglophone who’s never conversed or taken a class in french in their life can probably recognise a lot of french food-words. they kind of become part of how you visually recognise a product. it seems woefully incomplete if it’s not jambon ham + cheese fromage.)[/quote]
[quote=Moondragon]The whole English/French thing in Canada is like the English/Spanish thing here in California. Everywhere you go just about, signs are in English and Spanish, and you can pick up a few spanish words that way.
[/quote]

REALLY????????????????

Do you mean outside of Maine America does not print all food packages in French and English???? WOW! I actually did not know that. EVERYTHING in Maine, food, computers, appliances, comes in packaging printed in English on one side and French on the other.

That is so weird. I’ve never seen the packaging without French on it before. Yeah, that’d sort of freak me out.

[quote=ohmynoti]
-canadian tire is the standard go-to place for anything useful. it’s kind of like wal-mart, but slightly less evil + with even more annoying commercials. [/quote]

WalMart just started showing up here in Maine. OMG! That store is like freaking HUGE! Man! Most stores here in Maine, you walk in, and you can see the entire store – the whole place is maybe 900 feet square. Than WalMart shows up and what are they 200,000+ square feet? I mean, you can’t even see the back of the store from the front door and finding anything – argh! It takes you 20 minutes just to walk from one side to the other. It’s so weird and freaky. I don’t really like the big block stores moving in. It’s like we are being invaded or something. It’s just too weird for me.

[quote=jadedragon]There are harsher littering laws in Canadian cities than here in America so Canada is oftentimes way cleaner. NOT THEIR HARBORS.. but the streets and parks.[/quote]

That’s another thing Non-Mainers/Non-Canadian tourists point out about Maine. Maine has no-smoking laws (you can’t even smoke in your own car) and has had them since the 1970’s. There is a $500 fine for littering, and if police catch you throwing a cigarette butt on the ground, yeah, you got to pick it up and pay $500 for tossing it. You CAN go to jail for littering if you already got a warning before.

It’s rare to see trash on the ground in Maine, even in the big cities. Most towns have clean up crews that do nothing but walk around town all day long picking up litter. Non-Mainers/Non-Canadian tourists are constantly commenting on how clean everything is, which I’ve always found as strange because, I mean, why wouldn’t it be clean? What, are they saying that the rest of America outside of Maine are rude lazy slobs who don’t clean up after themselves? That’s always what I think, when some tourist comments on how clean and un-littered Maine’s cities are. It just baffles me, that where they come from is so different in cleanliness that CLEANLINESS is the thing they found to say as the reason they like Maine! OMG!

[quote=deadlyretro]

The only thing I can think of is that Milk tends to come in bags,(while I’ve been told it only comes in cartons in the States; just another stereo type?) LOL.
[/quote]

I can’t speak for the rest of America, but in Maine, milk comes in plastic bottles – pint, quart, gallon and glass bottle – pints and quarts only. It’s highly unusual to see a cardboard carton of milk. Orange juice comes in cartons.

Also, there are huge fines and jail time for buying and selling non-Maine milk in Maine. It’s like the equivalent of bootlegging.

And that’s another thing Non-Mainer tourists constantly complain about – milk prices. Every time I go to the store to buy milk, there will be some tourist there arguing with the store clerk about the milk prices. They really get going too – screaming and yelling and pounding their fists on the counter their face turning purple, their eyes bulging out hysterically, as they shriek out about “highway robbery” and “gypping” them. They go on about how they have never in their life paid more than a dollar for a gallon of milk, they say stuff like “You’d think it was gasoline” and “I could fill my car up for less!”, and than they storm out of the store without buying the milk.

I stand there amazed each time I see this, because well, a dollar for milk? A you kidding! Quarts of milk haven’t been a dollar since the 1970’s and don’t ever remember gallons being that cheap! Milk is a commodity, the price goes up and down with the gold bullion, gas, and corn prices – yeah, usually it’s 5 dollars a gallon, but it can go higher, a lot higher. Ten dollars for a gallon of milk – not unheard of. The price changes every day, some time several times a day, you never know what the current milk prices are until you get to the store and buy a bottle.

I kind of get the impression that milk is not a commodity outside of Maine, or that other states don’t have the “only in state milk” laws, and that the rest of America doesn’t have dairy farms on every corner.

[quote=TheWorldBeginsWithMe]I don’t think this has been said yet (I haven’t gotten through the whole thread), but vinegar on french fries. (and they are called french fries or fries not freedom fries or whatever) and our iced tea has a lot of sugar in it. It is not simply cold tea.[/quote]

Yep, again, Maine, a state in America is going with Canada on this. Tourists always freak out when they see us pouring vinegar on our French-fries. (and I’ve never of freedom fries before).

And when they order tea at restaurants they always freak out over it being way too sweet.

[quote=Bellalovett]The warmer weather might take some getting used to, especially if he goes as far Florida or Texas.[/quote]

Maine and New Hampshire are both actually colder than Canada. Some parts of Canada have a much longer growing season than we do here in Maine.

[quote=kimifly][quote=Nibo]Skittles made of chocolate in Canada? To my knowledge, having lived there for three years, they were not made of chocolate. However, Smarties were made of chocolate in Canada instead of that horrible chalky stuff (in Canada, that stuff is called Rockets).[/quote]
No, Skittles are not made of chocolate in Canada. Haha. :P [/quote]

There ARE chocolate skittles. I don’t know if they sell them in Canada or not, but they do exist, and they are called “Chocolate Skittles”.

. . . and I agree with this bloggers review of them, they taste terrible! http://www.unboundedition.com/pdp_thinking/2008/nov/13/rainbow-blight-a-chocolate-rain-on-skittles-parade/ (but there is a picture of them here if you’ve never seen them.

[quote=stefaneko]

Trees. I always miss the trees. Trees everywhere. I grew up/live in a suburb of Vancouver, and my house from ages 5-present is pretty much in the middle of a fricken forest. I walk through a forest to get to school, I play in the forest, I’m SURROUNDED by forest. I’ve noticed that in the States, even in the more northern regions, there’s a lot more clear-cutting and general suburban sprawl. It drives me NUTS. [/quote]

That’s the first thing Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian tourists say when they come to Maine – “Ugh, there are so many trees! You can’t see the sky! How can you stand it?” and than they start talking about being afraid of bear and mountain lions.

[quote=stefaneko]
That’s another thing. America feels more… soulless. It feels more unhappy, more… forced, I guess? It feels like everyone there hates their life. There’s more suburban sprawl, like I said. Plus, things seem less tidy. There’s more litter and more decay.
[/quote]

I get that same impression about the Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian tourists when they are here each summer.

[quote=kimifly]Also, depending on where in the US your character is moving, the winters might be very different. In the southern states they don’t have snow, so that means no building snowmen or having snowball fights or ice hockey or snowboarding or any other winter activities like that. And no snow at Christmas…. That’s what I missed the most when I was away from Canada.[/quote]

I hear a lot of the Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian tourists who come to Maine in the winter say they come for the snow because wherever it is they came from in the lower 47, they don’t have snow and well, Maine can get up to 6 or 7 feet per storm and in some place the snow drifts get over 20 feet tall. YAY Snow! Also, it’s pretty cold year round, and we have gotten snow in every month except for August. Our winters can be 8 months long during colder years in some areas.

And Non-Mainer/Non-Canadian tourists with children who spend their first winter in Maine and enroll their kids in the local school, freak out over the lack of “Snow Days”. We call anything under 6 inches a dusting and they start flipping out saying the schools should close! I’m thinking “What the hell? Are they nuts? This is nothing! Honey, I got news for you – in Maine there has to be 2 or 3 feet of snow and a blizzard wind force to get school canceled on account of snow. If you are scared of 6 inches of snow than you sure as hell better get your ass out of Maine before the FIRST (of many) blizzard of the season hits!” It never ceases to amaze me how folks from the lower 47 can have such huge panic attacks over a little snow.

Of course, you do got to remember, though Maine is part of America, geographically speak, we are farther North on the map that a large portion of populated Canada, so yeah, we are colder and get more snow than many places in Canada.

And let’s not forget Alaska – which is WAAAAY Above Canada. ;)

So yeah, where you move to in America is going to make a pretty big difference.

[quote=MissLizzy]I
-School here starts in September. In some parts of the States (I’m not sure aboue all), school starts mid-August.
[/quote]

Yeah, Non-Mainer tourists comment on how Maine’s school year is different than the rest of America’s – In Maine it runs from last week of August to the second week of June. So only July and a couple of weeks off August and June for vacation. But this is because of the snow. As mentioned above, it takes a lot of snow to warrant a snow day, but there is a reason for that. When we get enough snow for a snow day, it’s a snow week or more, usually due to state wide month long black outs and that fact that well, it’s kind of hard to have school when you can’t find the school building under all the snow. =P Most years students end up with no school through out most of January and most of February.

I guess, based on what the Non-Mainer tourists say, the rest of America has school running first week of September through second week of May.

==========

[quote=Laura Rainbow Dragon]

There are many cultural differences — which ones in particular your character experiences will depend on where in Canada he lived and where in the US he moves to, but expect him to experience some form of culture shock.

[/quote]

Yeah, what she said.

But anyways, the point of my post is. . . you REALLY need to figure out WHERE in the USA your Canadian is moving too, because if they were to move to Maine, the only things that would be different would be stuff like money and measurements, and such. Stores, habits, accents, slang, and attitudes would be pretty much the same as what they are already used too. Where as even a Mainer would have trouble moving to another state in the America, just because Maine is so different from the rest of the Union. (And that’s another thing – Maine folks say The Union, not America.)

Likewise, you got to remember, it would also depend on what part of Canada your character came from too. If he came from Quebec, French would be his first language, and changes are pretty high that he wouldn’t speak English much, if at all. Whereas the rest of Canada, speaks English and may not even know French.

So, you need to try to pin point exactly WHERE in Canada he came from and WHERE in the US he went to. Keeping in mind here that you are dealing with two of the world’s largest countries, meaning the peoples of each are pretty diverse and vary widely depending on what region of Canada/America they hail from.

Than once you know from where and to where, you can re-ask your question, and get better, more precise answers. As it stands right now, the best you can hope for is a huge mish mash of hundreds of different sub cultures.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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RE: How the hell did some of you people get to the word count you’re at? (NaNoWriMo)

Wednesday, November 11, 2009 · Leave a Comment

how the hell did some of you people get to the word count you’re at?

My history with NaNo has been somewhat dramatic and for years I have been known as one of the site’s yearly returning over achievers. To reach 50k was never once my goal, heck, I write more than that in a normal month anyways, 50k is nothing (for me at least.) My word counts each year have soared through the roof, and by my past history I should have reached 50k several days ago. (Last year I hit 50k on day 3 – which inspired an inbox full of flaming NaNoHateMails).

My goal this year was simple: To beat my word count from last year (which was 238,135). To make things simple, I just said I’ll aim at 250k, but than I added, I’d really like to double that and go for 500k this year.

Well, that was in October. Than October 20th I had a stroke. Nothing big, but enough to slow me down and make me lose a bit of my coordination skills, which are slowly returning, but still, I’m having difficulty with some things I previously had no problems with. Than to make things just a little bit worse, due to my being in the doctor’s office on the 21st, I ended up coming down with H1N1 flue on the 23rd, and was out of sorts for the next 14 days, bed ridden from the worst flue I’ve ever had in my entire life.

Long story short – my first week at NaNoWriMo this year was cut drastically due to my health not being at it’s peak, and now instead of being in the 100k range I should be at by the end of week one, I’m ended with first week of NaNoWriMo with a miserable 30k. :( :( :(

I’m feeling much better this week, so hopefully I well get back on track. In any case, seeing how I’m so far behind, I don’t think it’s a realistic goal for me to be aiming at 250k any more. I could probably do it if I pushed myself, but I’m still not 100% over the flue yet, so pushing myself is not really an option this year. As a result I changed my goal. My new goal is to end at some point between 100k and 500k. I figure I’m still in the running to hit 100k before the end of the month, and as long as I do that, I’ll be happy, but than once I hit 100k, I plan to keep right on going, just to see how far past it I can make it before the 30th.

As for, how I do it? Well, this year, of course my health has slowed me down, but even so, I’m still getting a pretty high word count. There is however a simple answer to your question:

I am a professional writer. I don’t have a “regular” day job. Writing IS my day job. I wrote my first book in 1978 and haven’t stopped since. I write fiction, non-fiction, how to books, short stories, articles, chap books, children’s chapter books, novels, novellas, and I write an average of 7k words per day, 5 days per week, 52 weeks per year, for the last 31 years.

I’m an “older” woman. In other words, I finished school many years before most of the other NaNoWriters were even born. Thus I have no school work to worry about either.

I am single. No husband or children under feet. I do however have 19 cats.

I do not have a TV. I can write during times when other NaNoWriters are being interrupted by their Soaps, News, Sports, whatever.

I suffer from Agoraphobia and PTSD. I’ve left the house less than a dozen times in the past 30 years.

My day goes like this:

    I get up at 7AM and start writing.

    Around noon I cook lunch, and than check the forums (which is why I’m here at this very moment.)

    From about 2PM to about 7PM I do whatever needs being done around the house/yard. If I have time I read during this time too.

    Between 7Pm – 9PM it’s time to cook and eat and read. At 9PM it’s back on the computer to write until Midnight.

    Five minutes before Midnight I update my word count that cruise the forums for a couple of hours.

    I go to bed around 3AM, sleep 4 hours and start over again the next day.

That is my schedule all year long – not just during NaNoWriMo, btw. As you can see, my days are spent pretty much doing nothing but writing all day long each and every day. I average 8 hours of writing per day. Just as others spend 8 hours a day at work, so too do I spend 8 hours a day a work, it’s just that I work at home and my job is to write.

What that all means is, I am at home 24 hours a day, and thus I am writing morning, noon, and night. And NaNoWriMo or no NaNoWriMo, I would being writing 100k to 200k this month anyways, so I might as well do it here with you guys rather than do it alone, like I do the rest of the 11 months of the year.

So, when you look at those of us who are way far ahead of the rest, think of it this way – most of us, have done NaNoWriMo many years now, and most of us are profession full time or part time writers who would have written this much anyways, even if NaNoWriMo did not exist, AND once upon a time, long ago and far a way, we were like you, trying to figure out how others found time to write. We didn’t always write like this. It took us many years of practice to learn how to make time to write.

If you have time (like 4 or 5 hours) to read a really long, really detail explanation about how I do it, you can read this: http://www.squidoo.com/The13StepMethod which I wrote specifically for NaNoWriters who ask this question to me dozens of times every single year.

Think of it as playing the piano – you don’t start out at Carnegie Hall, it takes years of practice to get there. You can’t do it over night, but if you stick with it and devote years of your life to practicing, you will eventual reach your goal and become, the writer with high word counts. Slow and steady wins the race, so, don’t worry about it. Just write what you can, when you can. If you have to, get up an hour earlier and go to bed an hour later and write while eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

Oh yeah – and Moxie – seriously – lots of Moxie. I drink two cases of Moxie a week during November. The caffeine high has me writing at super hyper speeds, even when I had H1N1 and shouldn’t have been able to write a word. Forget RedBull giving you wings – Moxie gives you jets packs!

Moxie btw way, for those who never heard of it: http://www.moxiefestival.com/

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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NaNoWriMo RE: None of my friends support my nanoing… ;__; & I just overheard my family complaining about me..

Tuesday, November 10, 2009 · Leave a Comment

black birdfall leaves centerblack bird

A question and my answer to it:

[quote=writelikeamadthing] I just overheard my family complaining about me…

Ouch.

Excuse me for having a goal and a deadline.

Excuse me for wanting to do something fun and worthwhile now that I’m currently – and hopefully temporarily – unemployed.

Excuse me for only having ONE chance to pause on the Write Or Die programme, and for not being able to concentrate on what I’m doing when you’re blathering on in my right ear.

Excuse me for thinking that writing a novel might be more worthwhile than a stupid computer game.

Excuse me for not being able to chat and focus on what I’m writing at the same time.

You know what? F*** you. Seriously. F*** you.


Apologies for anyone who just took the time to read this pointless rant, but, well. Ouch.

Today, my family sucks.


[/quote]

{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}

At least your mom is not emailing all your aunts and uncles and telling them that you are wasting your life on pipe-dreams (like my mom is doing) or emailing your bishop and your friends, and your boy friend and telling them lots of nasty lies about your book (my mom is doing that too.)

I found out my mom was doing this when I started getting nasty comments on my FaceBook wall from my relatives and church members, and I couldn’t understand what the hell they were talking about. I told my boyfriend about it and he said that my mom had been emailing him several times a day talking bad about me and my writing career goals. He than showed me the emails she had sent him. I was stunned! Than he told me that she had phoned both his sister and his father and was telling them what a terrible person I was because I wrote *wicked nasty books* and told them that they should keep my boyfriend away from me before I destroyed his life!

I started asking the folks who getting mad at me, why they were mad at me, and each one of them would tell me basically the same thing my boyfriend had told me. My mom wrote/emailed/called them and had lots of things to say about what a no-good person I was because of the things I write!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What gets me, is I’m 34 years. My mom is in her 50’s. She’s almost 60 years old, and she’s acting like a spoiled vindictive brat! I don’t know what is wrong with her or why she is doing this. It really upsets me though, to find out she is acting like this. I mean, she’s my mom! Why would she act like this? What does she gain out of it? What’s the point? I don’t get it at all.

But you know what? It makes me want to write even more. It makes me want to try to get this thing published even more. It makes me want to say: “See, I told you this wasn’t a waste of time. I told you writing a book was not me being lazy. I told you writing was a career not an excuse to be a bum. See? I published that book! I’m getting paid for writing it.”

So, yeah, hang in there. Some times some people are going to be major pain in the ass jerks, and unfortunately, sometimes those jerks are going to be close friends or even family members. It hurts, yes, but think of it this way: it’s their loss! When you finally get your book published, they’ll be known as the evil ones who tried to stand in your way and hinder your hard work.

[quote=Jen_Barber]MY mother called me yesterday and said I should be going out to meet men instead of staying in and writing. I’m 24 and she has grandbabies on the mind. Not kidding. She wants me married and picking out a house TODAY. Forget writing. I should be changing diapers. WHAT????


Obviously, my main female character is single. And two hundred years old. TAKE THAT MOTHER.
[/quote]

I have an uncle like that – AN UNCLE! Not even one of my parents but a distant uncle who I hardly know. He called me “the old maid” and goes around telling my friends and family that I am going to hell because I didn’t get married before I was 16 years old. SIXTEEN YEARS OLD FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!!!!!!!!!! He says I should have had at least 2 babies by the time I was 18, and than he brags about how his 14 kids all got married before they were 16 ad how today he’s got 50+ grand kids. OMG! This guy is a freaking nut case! (and yes, he is LDS/Mormon, that’s why he’s promoting the whole teen marriage, teen pregnancy, and one baby every 10 months thing). He’s sick. That’s all there is too it. This guy is just plain sick.

Every time he calls my an Old Maid, I rush back to whatever book I’m writing and have my villain rip some guys head off. I usually pretend it’s my uncle. That’s the good thing about being a writer – you can kill off every one who pisses you off in your books! X-P

None of my friends support my nanoing… ;__;
[quote=biachan]Whenever I tell my friends about nanowrimo, I get different results, but no one is happy fro me, or even shows me a bit of support. When I say I passed 12 thousand words, I was expecting someone to be proud of me, or be enthusiastic. Instead, I was met with a general aloofness, or even, negativity, as one friend said it was stupid to try nano because my book is going to suck. Most of them are even annoyed by it because I can’t hang out with my friends every day anymore.Thankfully, at least I have my mom supporting me. Am I the only one experiencing this, and what can I do to keep motivated?

[/quote]

I’m having the same problem. That’s why I go to the local Write In meetings. Have you gone to any of your local meetings yet? Meeting other WriMoers is a big help, because you get to talk with folks who actually know what you are doing and why you are doing it, because they are doing it too. Your region says, Miami, FL, so I just searched and the list of your local Write-In meetings is here: http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/node/281 and your region has 2 MLs (Write In Leaders) http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/109896 and http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/505152 I would NaNoMail them to find out the times-dates-places of the meetings being held in your area, and than go to them and chat with your local NaNoers.

I know where you are coming from with the negativity. I get it from my mom. She says the whole thing is a stupid waste of time and that my writing will never amount to anything. She says I should focus my energy on getting a *real job* rather than wasting my time on a writing career. Some months I’m lucky if I bring in $200 and she really enjoys rubbing that fact in my face. I try to tell her, that the more I write the better my writing gets, but she just blows it off.

My boyfriend calls me every day to ask: “So what’s your word count”. I tell him my new count, and goes: “That’s great, I’m really happy for you.” and than changes the subject. I try to tell him about my book and he’s like “Yeah, whatever, good for you.” He’s not being mean, but you can tell he doesn’t understand how important my writing career is not me, and he’s pretty bored with it. At least he’s trying to be supportive, even if his heart isn’t really in it. But, that’s the best I get from any one.

Last year’s NaNo was the worst though. Last yea I was a NaNoRebel and wrote my autobiography. Than in December I posted all 238k words of in as a blog post. I spent most of 2009 editing it, and it was published in October 2009. All that was great, except for one thing: I’m being excommunicated because of it!!!!!!! I had posted the first draft of it online on my blog last December, and my bishop got a hold of it (because my mom copied the blog post and emailed it too him) and did a total flip out . The church leaders have been on my back about it all summer about it. :( :( :(

Here’s a copy of my blog post from October 19th:

[quote=EelKat]

I was supposed to go to an excommunication hearing (it’s like a court with judges and witnesses and everything) this morning, but I was so stressed out about it that I ending up having a major panic attack and locked myself in my room instead. I’ve been going to the other meetings with the bishop and the other church leaders (some came in from out of state) and each one their accusation just get worse and worse and they never give me a chance to say anything in my own defense. Their latest accusation is to call me a witch consorting with demons! OMG! You could have floored me with THAT one! I mean, come on, what century are they living in here?


They’ve been pretty much holding back on the excommunication – in hopes that I would give in a not publish the book, but 3 days ago – I announced on my blog that I had received the proof copy and the sample cover art and had a preview of what the online catalog listing would look like – and I posted a copy of the info as well.


I guess my bishop watches my blog, because last night his counselor called me and told me I had to come in this morning and that they had brought in the State President (he’s the guy who would than send the papers to the Prophet in Utah – who would in turn send Salt Lake Leaders here to Maine for the final hearing.)


Well, I called my high priest, and he is stunned – he says he can’t figure out why or how my book got them so upset or why they are freaking out like this over it. He also said that with an excommunication proceeding, it doesn’t matter what I say, they’ll excommunicate whether I go or not, and that since my health is not really that good and stress makes it worse, he suggested that from now on I just ignore them and not go to any of the meetings, because there is no reason for me to put myself through the stress of sitting through all these hearings and listening to them belittle me. Well, I’ve been taking his advice for 22 years now and he’s never steered me wrong before (and he was a priest many years before the Bishop was even born, so he actually knows the church laws better.)


So, I took his advice and didn’t go to the hearing this morning, but than they called both my mom, and my dad and my 3 brothers and my step dad in, I guess because I didn’t show up, and from what they (my family) tell me, they got interrogated up one side and down the other. I guess the Stake President is really pissed that he came all the way down here and I didn’t show up. Well, after they called my family in, I was here alone at the house and I did a total meltdown wipe out panic attack – only thing I could think to do was to call my high priest and he came down from Wells and spent the day with me until I was calmed down enough to be left alone again. He’s really pissed off at the fact that they are getting me upset like this.


And I know I’m rambling – sorry – I didn’t mean to unload all my problems like that, but this whole thing just happened about 2 hours ago and I haven’t quite calmed down yet – my heart rate is just through the roof right now. I’m drinking tea and trying to relax and trying to think about plotting my NaNovel and worrying that they’ll get freaked out over the one I’m writing this year – it’s really getting in the way of my planning, actually. I gotta just keep telling myself to breeeeeeaaaath and relax and try to think happy thoughts – like plotting my NaNovel. I tried going to sleep, but I started having nightmares about the bishop and I can’t go for a walk because the snow is really coming down right now[/quote]

I’m prone to panic attacks, and I’ve been having them on a nearly weekly basis through out 2009, as a result of the stead stream of church leaders at my house, in my mail box, in my email, writing on my FaceBook wall – the constant threats, at one point some one taped a picture of a gun on my front door, 3 times I was attacked by a drive by paint balling, several times I’ve had rocks thrown threw the window. My book: http://www.lulu.com/content/paperback-book/for-fear-of-little-men/5954979 put them into a complete uproar, all of the 375+ members of my church building (It’s the LDS/Mormon church which is divided into regions) went into complete hysterics.

I don’t know who did it, but someone copied my original blog post and emailed copies of it to every member of my church and to members of some of the other regional church groups as well – the whole thing was one big mess with people sending me threats almost daily – all of the threats basically saying the same thing – “You better not publish that book or else . . . .” The or else varied depending on who was writing the threat, some said they would kill me, others said they would take me to court (and I’ve got about 6 or 7 people who have gone to court over this, so every few days I get a new summons from both the local and the state court houses) . The local church leaders contacted the high up church leaders in Salt Lake City, Utah, so I’m getting stuff from them too – threats to have me excommunicated if I go through with the publication of this book.

Well, anyways, this whole this has put me into a near agoraphobic state. I don’t dare go outside any more – I mean, when you open the front door to get your newspaper and you get hit by paint balls, it’s pretty bad. Paint balls hurt! I’m scared of these people, and I don’t know how I’m supposed to deal with this. And to make things worse – I STILL don’t know why me publishing my NaNoWriMo 2008 book, has got them acting like this?????? These people are so vindictive and I don’t even know why? I can’t figure out what it says in my book that got them going so crazed like this.

Here is the more recent repost of it. This is what I wrote for NaNoWriMo 2008 http://eknano.blogspot.com/2009/07/repost-for-fear-of-little-men-first.html it’s 238k words long, but if you want to give it a go, you can go ahead and read it and see if you can figure out why they have gone bonkers over trying to stop me from publishing it.

Well, the panic attacks have been getting worse with each new thing they do or say and on October 20th I had a stroke, which has had a disastrous effect on my life. I’m only 34 years and I had a stroke. One friend asked me – “Well, shouldn’t you blame NaNoWriMo? You had a stroke because you did NaNoWriMo last year, so why are you doing it again this year?”

My answer to that is – “No, I didn’t have a stroke because of NaNoWriMo, I had a stroke because of people’s reaction to what I wrote. I would have written it any ways, NaNoWriMo or no NaNoWriMo. These people are nothing but cry-baby vindictive A-holes. It’s not NaNoWriMo’s fault that these people did what they did. Yes, I’m doing NaNoWriMo again. I’ve been doing it for years and years and years and I’ll keep right on doing it for years – as long as they have the contest, and if they ever stop having the contest, well, heck, I’ll keep right on doing it any ways! You can be negative about my writing all you want – I am not going to let some mean, jealous, vindictive, winy people stop me from writing. I love writing. Writing is my life. If they don’t like it, well it’s their problem, not mine!”

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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30k on Day 10 of NaNoWriMo

Tuesday, November 10, 2009 · Leave a Comment

I don’t really have an end point goal. I figure I’ll end some where between 100k and 500k depending on where my book(s) decide to end themselves. With that goal in mind, I figure, as long as I write a minimum of 3k per day, I won’t worry about the rest. (I had planned on doing no less than 5k per day, but recent changes in my health had me change it to 3k per day instead.)

However, writing 3k per day, though it’s an easy thing to do, has been a bit difficult for me this year, due to a stroke in October, and than getting h1n1 flue a week later. I’m having lingering side effects that have had me in a state of walking around like a zombie – too tired to do anything, but feeling too icky to sleep. Sadly, this has resulted in my word count being much lower than usual.

Last year I had hit 50k on November 3rd. This year, today is the 10th and I’m just hitting 30k now. . . I know most folks would look at the 30k and tell me I’m way ahead, but I look at it and compare it with my previous NaNoWriMo word counts and think – damn, I’m so far behind!

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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NaNoWriMo RE: Is any one else being distracted because they would rather be writing in a different genre?

Tuesday, November 10, 2009 · Leave a Comment

black birdfall leaves centerblack bird

[quote=crazy_sane_person]This year I decided to try out a different genre than I normally do, but I have hit a bit of a slump because I am busy pining for Fantasy (my writing first love). My nano this year is just about normal people in a normal place, with lots of focus on the relationships between the characters, and there isn’t even so much as a shadow of anything vaugely magical, mythical, or supernatural. There hasn’t even been an opportunity to insert a good fight scene into the story yet. I would tweak the story a little bit to fit some fantasy elements in, but then I feel like I would be abandoning a perfectly good story line. I have already commited myself to writing something other than fantasy this November. I am trying to console myself that once nanowrimo ends I can write about talking beasts and magical beings all I want, but it is still feeling like it is going to be a looooong rest of the month. Is any one else being distracted because they would rather be writing in a different genre?
———-
[/quote]

I find that when I get stuck, the best thing to do is:

    1) Drop a dead body some place where your MC will find it, it could be one of the characters you are already using or it could be just “Mr. Body” (from Clue the board game). OR 2) Have a vampire attack your MC or have you MC witness what they believe to be a vampire attack; this can happen in a non-fantasy world, if your MC is really superstitious and believes vampires COULD exists even though they don’t – they could have just witnessed a mugging, but because they are so superstitious they thought they saw a vampire attack some one.

In either case it gives you something “exciting” for your characters to do. A dead body always stops your MC in their tracks and makes them do something about it, and a vampire always causes some sort of new sub plot to happen. And this being NaNoWriMo, if it doesn’t match the rest of your plot, you can always take it out come December.

The reason for doing this would be to keep your story interesting or at least to keep you interested in writing it. By adding some thing not in your original plot, it makes you look at your plot in a new way and will help you to see ways to make it fun to keep on writing.

Of course, some times it’s just better to follow your gut too. And if your gut is telling, drop this and write something else, than, maybe that’s what you should do.

Of course than there is alway: WRITE EVERYTHING!

—write your normal characters AND write a fantasy at the same time – two books at once—

That’s what I’m doing. Well, to sort of explain what happened, it went like this: what started out as one big novel, added 2 smaller novellas, than a series of 4 children’s chapter books, and now I’ve got a series of short horror stories inspired by one sentence prompts, which will end up as a two volume set going as well!

For my short story book set, I’m attempting to make each (or at least as many of them as possible) of these prompts into stories (each 1k to 5K long) about Dracula. I’m also trying to find a way to include Rancid Yak Butter in each one. 100 short stories times 1k words = 100k words right? and 5k times 100 is 500k? So that means I’ll be writing up to 500k this year???????? YIKES! What did I get myself into? Wow, what a weird DARE I’ve made for myself! LOL!

In between all of that I started writing a writers “how to guide”. =P

Problem is, every time I write something I think – hey, that’d be good if I did this with it instead. Next thing I know, I’m starting a different book/plot. As soon as I get an idea I have to write it down so I don’t forget it, but than I start writing the whole thing, not just the idea. I can’t stop starting new writing projects!

Anyways, as it stands right now, I am writing one novel, 4 children’s chapter books, 100 short stories, and a non-fiction how to guide. I’m going back and forth between each of them, writing a few pages for each of them each day. So, I’m sort of not a rebel, yet at the same time I’m doing a *do what I want* rebellion. Who knows, which, if any, of my book projects is actually FINISHED by November 30th.

I can see this project going through December and into January, seeing how it looks like I’ll need 500k to finish all of them. Oh well, at least it’ll keep me busy once Maine’s blizzard season gets going and I’m stuck inside with nothing to do all day – I’ll have plenty to write! LOL!

[quote=The Unconqured Frontier]Now’s not the time for restrictions. [/quote]

I’ll second that! Don’t stick yourself in a hole and say you can not write anything other than the one plot you planned on writing.

I had my plot all ready to go – outlined, character bios, world created – spent 2 months writing it all up, was all excited and ready to go. Than midnight of Oct 31/Nov 1st strikes and I start writing a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT plot all together!

On October 31st, I stayed up all night (seeing how it was Halloween) watching Bela Lugosi movies. The Devil Bat ended at 12:13 and I started writing and before I realized what I was doing I found myself writing Bela Lugosi/Dracula fan-fic instead of my plot! Now I have no plot, no characters (except Bela Lugosi), no world created, and yet, here I am writing away at the seat of my pants with no idea where it’s going, and I’m actually liking it and it’s surprisingly really good – damn good! YAY!

Just go with the flow of NaNoWriMo. If you need to throw an army of battling orcs in the middle of your normal world – than do it. You can remove that scene come December, or you could have it be a scene from a book your MC is reading, or a nightmare they had one night, or a hallucination. There are lots of ways you could add fantasy action into your book without turning it into a magical world. You could have your MC go to the movies and than write the movie s/he is watching.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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NaNoWriMo End of the Week Word count (2 days late)

Monday, November 9, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Day 1:

Today’s word count: 3183
First word: Where
Last word: bats
Total Words: 3183
====================
Day 2:

Today’s word count: 2134
First word: I
Last word: Dracula
Total Words: 5317
====================
Day 3:

Today’s word count: 3534
First word: He
Last word: will
Total Words: 8851
====================
Day 4:

Today’s word count: 1270
First word: Dr. Lejos
Last word: chocolate bars
Total Words: 10121
====================
Day 5:

Today’s word count: 487
First word: What
Last word: said
Total Words: 10608
====================
Day 6:

Today’s word count: 10242
First word: I
Last word: too
Total Words: 20850
====================
Day 7:

Today’s word count: 3369
First word: The
Last word: freezer
Total Words: 24219
====================

That was the end of Week One, and here is the start of Week Two

Day 8

Today’s word count: 1599
First word: Zeb
Last word: night
Total Words: 25818

And now – off to start writing Day 9 — I’m hoping to reach 30k by tonight

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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100 Writing Promts for NaNoWriMo

Monday, November 9, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Well, what started out as one big novel, than became a series of 4 children’s chapter books, and now seems to be evolving into a series of short horror stories inspired by one sentence prompts. Here are the prompts I’m currently using. For my own book, I’m attempting to make each (or at least as many of them as possible) of these prompts into stories (each 1k to 5K long) about Dracula. I’m also trying to find a way to include Rancid Yak Butter in each one. 100 short stories times 1k words = 100k words right? and 5k times 100 is 500k? So that means I’ll be writing up to 500k this year???????? YIKES! What did I get myself into? Wow, what a weird DARE I’ve made for myself! LOL!

Anyways, I was thinking, there might be something here in this list one of you might be able to use as a dare in your own NaNovel, so I thought I’d pass my list on to you, just in case. Here it is:

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

A reality show contestant can’t handle the sudden fame and becomes a recluse.

A woman digging in her garden discovers . . .

A high rise window washer witnesses something horrifying while washing the top floor windows.

A book comes and says: “Write me.”

Two childhood friend reunite after 20 years. One of them is a serial killer.

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

A scientist has an other worldly experience, which forces him to reevaluate his spiritual beliefs.

An older married couple is trying to recapture the romance of their youth.

You’ve burned my waffles for the last time.

Two strangers agree to share a room after it’s announced there are no more rooms available.

All this because he cooked some eggs?

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils.

While plowing his newly purchased land, a farmer discovers a mass grave.

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

Whatever you do, don’t turn on the lights!

Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you’ll be disconnected!

Venice, Italy is sinking rapidly and must be evacuated.

Gravestone reads: I told you I was allergic to shellfish.

Did the shag carpet just get up and walk away?

Following the trail of several murders, a detective finds an unlikely clue when taking his family to visit Stonehenge.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

A woman finds a strange laptop and a list of instructions in her bed room.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep — not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

While on a cruise a man and his wife stumble upon several dead bodies.

But I was just trying to stay out of the way . . .

A young scientist finds the cure for cancer. The next day he receives a threatening phone call. A week later his body washes up on the beach.

Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? ‘Hold my purse.’

An excommunicated priest receives a holy relic in the mail.

I’m sorry, but your position is being eliminated.

A man looked out his window to see some one digging in his back yard.

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Says the man falling from the sky: “Hello ground!”

An old man returns to the tree in which he carved his long lost sweetheart’s initials.

Only after she dies during surgery, does the head surgeon realize the patient was his daughter.

After years of dead end leads a tabloid reporter finds evidence of a legendary small town monster.

This is my first time on a plane.

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

A book store clerk decides to recommend the same book to all her customers regardless of what they ask for.

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.

You find the Venus de Milo’s arms.

The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do.

An escaped convict is trying to get as far away as possible from civilization.

A woman is attracted to a bus driver and finds excuses to ride his bus every day.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

Quit eating my pudding cups!

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

A door to door sales man witnesses a crime.

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

A man decides to attend the funeral of his favorite author.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Do you notice anything different about me?

The only reason people get lost in thought is because it’s unfamiliar territory.

What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?

A couple renovating a house, discover a secret passage.

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

A woman wakes up to find herself horribly disfigured after using a face cream that promised amazing results.

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.

A mail carrier suspects some one on his route is engaged in some thing fishy.

I have opinions of my own — strong opinions — but I don’t always agree with them.

A botanist proves that plants feel pain and exhibit conscious thought.

When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That’s relativity. – Albert Einstein

Help! Some one in this book is trying to kill me!

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.

Why do you have ten cans of easy cheese in your cart?

He who laughs last didn’t get it.

A blue lion walked past her window and disappeared into the woods.

Everyone has photographic memory; some just don’t have the film.

A man is astonished to discover he has grown gills,

There are three sides of an arguement — your side, my side and the right side.

She must choose between a professional body builder and a burnt out college professor.

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

While on a camping trip, the family finds a carnival in the middle of no where.

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

Seven people take a boat trip, but only six return.

There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.

Car service: If it ain’t broke, we’ll break it.

Who are you and how did you get in here? —– I’m a locksmith. And… I’m a locksmith…

If there is a “WILL”, there are 500 relatives.

It’s 11PM, do you know where your pants are?

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists?

This is a quantum car. I don’t know where I am, but I’m going really fast.

That makes exactly 100.

These btw came from this book: The Writer’s Book of Matches: 1,001 Prompts to Ignite Your Fiction (Writers Digest) This book has been a constant inspiration for me and each of these prompts can be used over and over and over again – as short stories, as flash fiction, as novels, as comedy, as horror, as sci-fi, as romance, etc. I’ve been using this book to get ideas for my writing for the last 5 or 6 years and it never ceases to amaze me the ideas it inspires. I highly recommend that if you are going to be writing a lot of stories, you really MUST get this book!

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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The Poison Pen Letters Return – AGAIN

Sunday, November 8, 2009 · Leave a Comment

An interesting thing happened today. At 3AM this morning I found my self being yelled at by one of the local LDS/Mormon church members, who for whatever reason saw fit to wake me up at 3AM to scream their lungs out at me. uhm-huh. Never a moments peace with these people around. 3AM in the morning. I was being yelled at, something to do with “a church full of letters” and “letters flying around the church”. After 45minutes of screaming and yelling I finally figure out what was going on. Apparently people in the Sanford Ward, a church some, I don’t know, 50 miles away, had received a bunch of nasty letters from me. Interesting, considering I have not written a letter in nearly 20 years. Even more interesting, considering I not only do not know the addresses of the people in question, but I don’t even know the names of the people in question to even be able to find their addresses. I did however find it participially odd, that when I asked to see these so called letters which I supposedly wrote, suddenly they had no evidence of the existence of any such letters . . . they uhm . . . seemed to have all disappeared in one way form or another. Very interesting point indeed.

It was around 5AM before I finally had some peace and quiet again. I went about my day and thought nothing of this, rather odd, but, not exactly unexpected incident. Well, unexpected, but, I am never fully expectant of anything these people do to e or say about me, I just know that every week for the past 31 years, they show up with some new accusation. That they will weekly accuse me of something new, that I have come to expect.

And so my day moved on. This being November, I really don’t bother with anything other than my writing contest entry for NaNoWriMo, and since I try to ignore these strangely persistent religion crazed sickos anyways, writing for NaNoWriMo makes it easier for me to forget about them.

Than night time rolls around and it is nearing on 7PM, when ANOTHER person from the LDS/Mormon church shows up with nearly identical accusations. More stuff about “a church full of letters” and “letters flying around the church”. There was one remarkably odd difference here. The accusations of this morning were of letters to members of the Sanford Ward in Sanford, like I said, some 50 miles away. The accusations of tonight however were letters to members of the Saco Ward in Saco, just a 5 minute jog from my house. Interesting. My, it does seem I’ve been busy here. So exactly how many letters is it that I was supposed to have written here?

Judging from what each person said, it seems there are maybe 30 or 40 or more letters involved. I do find it a bit odd that these mysterious letters, however, can not be produced and all seem to have mysteriously vanished, causing me to have serious doubts as to wither they ever actually existed at all.

Of course the fact that I was 21 years old the last time I even attended that church is another point to take into consideration. That means as of today, it has been 13 years since I last had any thing to do with these people. I have not spoken to these people. I have not seen these people (excepting of course when they paint ball me, or throw rocks at me, and let’s not forget that on October 21, 2006 they set fire to my home.) I have initiated zero contact with them in 13 years. Heck, I have agoraphobia, I haven’t even left the yard in 13 years!

THIRTEEN FREAKING YEARS!!!! And they continue to persist in their constant accusations, backstabbing, and acts of vandalism. Why? Why do they do this? What the hell is wrong with these nuts? THIRTEEN FREAKING YEARS!!!! Can any one say VINDICTIVE?

What I want to know is, what the hell is wrong with these people? So I don’t go to church any more . . . so the hell what? Look at the way you people are acting and ask yourselves, is it any wonder why I don’t? It’s been 13 years people – get over it!!!!! I’m not bothering you. Why can’t you leave me alone? I really have to wonder – do you do this to every body who doesn’t go to church any more, or is there some particular reason you creeps are focusing all your energy on me? I mean, it just freaks me out that you people put so much energy into these ludicrous, and ever increasing more ludicrous, acts of hatred.

The thing that really gets me, is that half the people throwing accusations at me, I don’t even know. I’ve never seen them before in my life. I never even heard their names before. I’m looking at these people and thinking – Who the hell is this nut and why should I care? I don’t know who you are. How do you even know who I am? Who are you? What do you want from me? Why are you in my yard? How do you know my name? And how the hell could I have written a letter to you when I don’t even know you? – - –

Come on people! Get a brain! Stop letting yourselves be brainwashed, by, whoever the hell it is that put you up to these ridiculous shinanagings. I mean, do you even know who I am? Do you even know why you are screaming and yelling and accusing me of these idiotic things you keep accusing me of? Why do you do it? What do you get out of it? Is somebody paying you to do these things or something?

I do find it troubling, these accusations of letters, because it is not the first time this happened. It’s not even the second or third time it’s happened either. The last time I was made aware of it happening was in 2003, when like today, I was suddenly and cluelessly bombarded with a dozen or so accusations from a whole slew of people, all saying the same thing – that I had written them nasty letters. Like today, however, those people were unable to provide the so called letters.

It happened on several different occasions while I was a teenager and through out my early teens.

I did however see one of these so called letters in 1993, when the infamous Bishop Morgan received a whole series of them over a period of several months. Most of them “signed by me”, one however, was not. The letter writer accidentally signed his real name onto one of the letters. My Intelligence Officer Major uncle. This was the letter I saw. Bishop Morgan had a stack of letters on his desk, about 50 of them, each of them averaging a whooping 60 to 70 pages long, all of them had been mailed to him over a period of only a few weeks. He had received them at a rate of 3 or 4 letters per day. The one with my uncle’s signature he had opened up and spread out on his desk, and thus this was the letter I saw, and yep, having likewise received his daily 60 page letters for the past several years myself, I recognized the letter as being his handwriting immediately, with his tiny scrawl, that almost needs a magnifying glass to read.

One look at that handwriting would tell any one who knew me personally, that I had not written those letters. Any one who knows my handwriting would see the difference immediately. I’m nearly blind, my words are huge, and not neat, I can’t see well enough to write neatly, and I don’t write in every day English either, I write in secretarial short hand and I neither print nor use cursive, I write in italic, all in all making it very difficult for most people to even translate my words let alone make out my handwriting. The average person wouldn’t even recognize italic if they saw it, and short hand died decades ago. I’m an author. I write books. Big ones. And I hand write my drafts. The only way to write my drafts by hand at the speeds I write, is to write in short hand italic, which is how I also write when I do write letters, which, isn’t very often.

There was one other person who wrote like me and could and did forge my handwriting in the past: my blind grandfather. He used a writing board (sometime incorrectly referred to as a brail writers- a REAL brail writer is a type of type writer) to keep his lines straight and on the paper. Because he was blind, he wrote huge, he wrote short hand, and he wrote italic – three things that quickly identify the writer as blind or nearly so, because no one but blind or nearly blind people use this style of handwriting. Because of his blindness he was able to nearly duplicate my handwriting. (Due to the fact that I myself am nearly blind.) Poison pen letters was something my grandfather was notorious for. He started writing them in the 1930’s. By the 1960’s he was addressing them to LDS/Mormon church leaders in Salt Lake. By the 1990’s I was there and saw him writing the letters to the Prophet – bizarre letters claiming that God had told him (my grandfather) that he was the REAL Prophet and that the Prophet in Salt Lake was a false Prophet. Of course, there were also several occasions when my grandfather show up at the Prophets home and told him such things to his face as well. My grandfather had schizophrenia btw, which did explain his ravings of God talking to him and his odd 70 year long habit of writing poison pen letters.

Poison pen letters. Letters written by one person, made to look like another person had written them, and mailed at alarming rates to every one in town (or in this case, church). Letters written with one goal in mind: to destroy the good name and reputation of others. I do have to question the sanity of any one who would write a poison pen letter, and yet, both my uncle and his father, have a history of writing poison pen letters, for decades before I was born, they had written similar letters to others, that time laying the blame on my grandmother.

The poison pen letters that showed up first in Cape Elizabeth Ward (now renamed and called the Portland Ward), later in the Sanford Ward, and now in the Saco Ward, are a constant steady reoccurred in my life. They are a mystery that has long baffled me. The fact that they habitually get written to people I do not even know, is also a puzzlement. But it is the fact that in every occurrence of a round of these letters, that they are always supposedly signed by me, that is the most troubling fact of all, for it means that some where out there, I have a stalker, and a vicious vindictive stalker who takes great delight in stirring up trouble and finding ways to make people angry with me.

I have yet to identify this person, but it would seem that it is someone who has known me for a very long time, seeing how these sorts of things have been going on now for 31 long and nerve wracking years. The last round of poison pen letters that I was made aware of, occurred in 2003. Since my grandfather’s death there has been no more reports of poison pen letters supposedly signed by me, until today. And so it seems, the poison pen writer strikes again.

I do not understand why the person who does this, persists in doing these things. The poison pen letters, the pictures of guns taped to the front door, the rocks through the windows, the paint balls every time I go outside, my 75 pet hens gutted and hung in my rose bushes, the breaking and the sledge hammer taken to all of my furniture, my house burnt to the ground . . . for 31 years I’ve had to live with this. Who is the creep that is stalking me? Why are they doing this? And when will it end?

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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A question for TEENS… what do YOU want? (A NaNoWriMo Post)

Saturday, November 7, 2009 · Leave a Comment

(1) What are the five BEST or most important qualities you look for in a compelling YA novel?

    #1: Dialog: Lots of it! A few phrases of flowery descriptions scattered in here and there between dialog is fine, but when you start writing page after page after page of descriptions, I start falling asleep. There should be dialog on every page. More than 50% (maybe even 75%) of your book should be dialog. The remaining should be largely action.

    #2: Characters I Can Identify With: If I’m looking at your character and thinking – “What the hell is she doing? I’d never be that stupid/mean/prissy/whatever!” you can be sure that I will never get to the end of the book. I want a believable character.

    By believable I don’t mean realistic either. Okay – so she has wings and flies – great, I’m cool with fantasy stuff, fantasy stuff is not what I mean when I say believable. If people shoot fire from their fingertips in your universe, I can go along with that. No, what I mean is, when your MC starts acting like some flat bland stereotype who can’t think for themselves. I don’t like characters that feel like you just randomly pulled them out of a hat.

    I need to know that this character is “real”. Give them goals, emotions, family, problems, flaws, hopes, dreams, a favorite food, etc. Have them act real. Have them worry about things. Family problems are always in the back of your mind – “What will mom think if I do this?”, “How can I spend time trying to solve this mystery when Granddad’s in the hospital?”, “I hope I get home before dad finds out I’m gone” . . . etc. Little things like that, make the character seem more real. It tells me that – hey, she’s got the same worries and fears I do. It tells me that – hey, in spite of everything else, she made it.

    #3: Third Person: Third person point of view is easier to read than first person. I don’t know why, but I find it hard to read most first person stories. Not all – Edgar Alan Poe is amazing and most of his stuff was first person, but it was really well written. That’s the problem. Most times first person is not well written. Usually first person seems dull, bland, and like the author was too lazy to try to do anything else.

    Sure, third person is harder to write and takes a lot more effort to write well, but guess what – by putting more effort into your writing, you end up writing a better story!

    #4: Adult characters, plus, heroes to admire, and villains to defeat: Not just bad guys, but actual villains. Evil monsters from the great beyond, mad scientists with devious plans, black hearted emotionless vampires that stalk the streets leaving bloodless bodies in their wake, psychopathic machine gun toting circus clowns with a macabre sense of humor, evil snake obsessed wizards bent on controlling the world, megalomaniac robots from space plotting global domination, EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!

    Real bad ass villains that scare the day lights out of you and make you think this guy is really going to win, the hero will never make it. You know – the type of villain that just walked out of Doctor Who episodes or Batman comic books or Harry Potter. Why aren’t there more books like Doctor Who out there? An adult hero who fights adult villains and scary (though somewhat fake) monsters? And I seriously believe that Harry Potter was so successful because it had a REAL villain in it. YA so rarely has a villain that comes across as pure evil, the way Voldemort did.

    In the 1950’s kids books had Super Heroes and Super Villains. Today if we want to see super heroes and super villains we are forced to look for them in comic books. What ever happened to the overblown heroes we could look up to to fight off the overblown villains and monsters that lurked in the night? Come on! Toddlers every where love being terrified by Dracula and I was reading blood splattered Batman comics when I five years old for crying out loud! It’s not like a bloodsucking vampire or gangster clown with a machine gun is too adult for me! Just because you are writing for kids and teens doesn’t mean you have to give us wimpy bad guys.

    Look at the classic YA novels – Dracula, The Phantom of the Opera, The Time Machine, Jane Eyer, War of the Worlds, Moby Dick, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, The Three Musketeers, Retief, Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, Conan, A Christmas Carol, Frankenstein, The Island of Dr Moureo, Flash Gordan, The Invisible Man, Star Trek OS, etc. Not a kid in sight. Adult characters. Big bad villains. Strong heroes we can look up to. Why doesn’t any one write thing kind of stuff any more? YA books used to be fun. Books today are too serious, too much classroom/schoolyard setting, too much focus on reality. A sense of escapism is good some times. Everything doesn’t have to take place in school you know! Characters can go to far off places and distant galaxies every one in a while. A bit of a break from reality is good for the mind. Why can’t characters today loosen up and have some fun adventures? Why aren’t books today fun?

    Why does every one now a days think that the characters HAVE to be teenagers in order for the book to be YA? Why can’t adults be the MCs in YA books any more? They used to be.

    #5: Male Characters I prefer reading a book heavy in male characters. Why? Several reasons. For one thing I’m a girl and I just love an MC that I can fall head over heels for (preferable an adult man whom I can dream about as being my future *knight in shining armor* dream guy). Secondly, whenever a girl is the MC she is phony and stereotyped and I can’t stand that. Either she’s a whiny idiot, a complete dolt, a slutty trash mouthed gang chick, or a priss-ant snob. Why can girls be girls? Why must they always be cookie cutter stereo types?

(2) What are the five WORST things… the ones that make you go “blech” and put the book back on the shelf?

    #1: Red Herrings — ICK! I hate them. Yesterday I was reading a YA mystery and it was going along pretty good and I thought I knew what was happening. Than in the last chapter the MC’s best friend solves the case by saying: “I know who did it! Last week I was reading a magazine about actor so-and-so. It was him! He did it!”. Than they tell an adult who says, yep, actor soand-so is in town, I’ll bet he did do it. Than they rush to the hotel and viola! There is actor so-and-so and they say – “You did it and we know it!” He admits he did it. The End.

    I sat there wondering – What the Hell just happened? I reread the book again, thinking I must have missed something. Nope. I didn’t. No where in the 15 chapters prior, to the final chapter, did actor so-and-so ever get mentioned. No where did MCs best friend ever read a magazine or mention that she had done so. Through out each chapter, tons of clues were dropped that pointed to 3 different characters, all of whom were prime suspects. Reading the book, you thought it was going to be one of those 3 characters. Than suddenly 5 pages before the end, the MCs friends remembers that at some point waaaaaaay before the book started she remembered reading about some guy who was never mentioned at all, and he did it? How the hell is a reader supposed to figure out the bad guy was some one who wasn’t even in the book to begin with!!!!!!!

    I hate it when a Red Herring shows up like that. No matter how good the book was, if it ends with a Red Herring (some one that was never in the book to begin with) being the one who did it, I’ll suddenly hate it and it’s author and I will never read another book by that author again because I feel like they gypped me.

    #2: Sex and Drugs and oh F*@K that B!&@H to Hell! look at that more sex and drugs — ICK! I hate this. I really, really, REALLY HATE this! Sex on every page. All the kids on drugs-smoking-drinking-etc, and every other word out of every kids mouth being a swear. Come on people! Let kids be kids not trash mouthed gang bangers! How many REAL kids do you know who act like this?

    What ever happened to the average girl? Sure she may swear once in a while. Yeah, maybe she did a couple of bad things. Maybe her parents are poor and she grew up on the wrong side of town, Okay – so she’s not perfect, but heck, you don’t have to make her sound like she’s on a one way road to a life sentence! No body is all bad, and no body is perfect. Give your character flaws, yes, but don’t go overboard with it! I want a character I can identify with, not one I want to see the cops hand cuff and drag away!

    Dear Author: I don’t know what kind of schools YOU went to but man, if they really did spend all their time focusing on sex and drugs and teachers were letting the kids swear in class – man – your town REALLY has some MAJOR problems! Maybe instead of preaching at kids through your books, maybe you should be out in front of your town hall petitioning for better school funding to get the sex and drugs out of the school so the kids in your school would stop acting like sluts and gutter whores! By making your MCs act like low life trash, all you are doing is telling other kids it’s all right to be a worthless nothing going no where in life.

    And one more thing – why is it that EVERY SINGLE homeless teen in YA fiction is homeless because they ran awat from home, got pregnant, or are dealing drugs? You want to write about homeless teens, maybe you better talk to a few REAL ones first – I’ll raise my hand and go first, because guess what? I’m homeless. I live under a tarp. You find out quickly who your REAL friends are when one day you have a “normal” life and the next day you lose everything to a flood. People love you because of what you own, not because of who you are – once you become homeless you become friendless – without your possessions to attract people to you, you are on your own and all alone with not a single friend to talk to or turn to for help – that is the biggest lesson I learned during my time being homeless. You want to find out what it’s like to be homeless? Try reading this interview with a REAL homeless person (me) http://www.squidoo.com/OnBeingHomeless2

    #3: I’m better than you, I got money! — ICK! I hate this too. Rich girls (or guys) with brand new cars (4 or 5 of them), who are members of every high priced social club in the state and eat nothing but caviar. Come on people! How many REAL girls act like this?

    What ever happened to the average girl? Sure she may act snobby once in a while. Yeah, maybe her parents do own half the town. Maybe she did get her first car at age 16 and likes to show it off, Okay – so she’s not perfect, but heck, you don’t have to make her sound like she kicked God off the thrown and is about to take over the galaxy with all her money!

    Dear Author: I don’t know what kind of town YOU grew up in but man, if they really did spend all their time focusing on showing off how rich they were – I don’t know. Maybe instead of preaching at kids through your books, maybe you should move to a new town where their are people you fit in with better so you don’t have to let your inferiority complex show through your characters. By making your MCs act like silver spoon rich trash, all you are doing is telling other kids it’s all right to be a worthless nothing who spends life looking down on others.

    Why do characters either have to be one extreme or the other? Can’t you have REGULAR girls in your books? Why do they always have to be teenage gang banger sluts or teenage future Ivana Trump priss-ants? Can any one say Stereotype cliche? Give us some believable REAL characters once in a while. Your characters need a happy medium some where between all bad and all goody two-shoes.

    No body is all bad, and no body is perfect. Remember that. It’s important! Repeat it one hundred times every time you create a new character! No body is all bad, and no body is perfect.

    #4: I sit here thinking about the beautiful purple sunsets sending rays of light across the green grassy hills and listening to the sound of pretty blue feathered song birds as they sing their songs of . . .

    YAWN . . . . So when is the story going to start? Or when are we going to get back to the characters? Or, you know, when are we going to do something, ANYTHING?

    A few phrases of flowery descriptions scattered in here and there between dialog is fine, but when you start writing page after page after page of descriptions, I start falling asleep. There should be dialog on every page. More than 50% (maybe even 75%) of your book should be dialog. The remaining should be largely action.

    You can tell me that on your planet the trees are blue, but don’t tell me the entire biology lesson on the hows and why of the tree being blue. So it’s blue. That great! Now get on with the action. What else is the character doing besides noticing that the trees are blue? Is there someone hiding behind the blue tree? Why did the character tell me the tree was blue? Why purpose does the blue tree have in your plot? I’m not a botanist, I don’t need to know what every plant on your planet looks like and why it looks that way – all I care about is what your MC is doing.

    Less prose – more action. Less prose – more dialog. Give me a fast read, don’t slow me down with flowery purple prose.

    #5: I’m Not Stupid – Don’t Talk Down To Me and Preach at Me!

    Don’t waste an entire chapter telling me why lions live in Africa and Tigers live in China. If I wanted to know that, I’d have looked for it on Wikipedia. Don’t spend 3 pages telling me the symptoms of cancer. Tell me your MC has cancer and move on to how she deals with it. If I want to know the symptoms and details of treatment, I’ll read a medical journal. Okay, so maybe I don’t know where Yorkshireville Town is. If I want to know, I’ll look it up on Google Earth, I don’t need you to give detailed directions. I’m not planning on a trip there, I just want to read your novel.

    Remember that you are writing a story not a dictionary. You are writing a story not a medical journal. You are writing a story not a travel guide. You are writing a story. Stop explaining every thing to me and just tell the story! Don’t act like I’m a retard and stop the story to explain everything. I’m smarter than you think. I know what you mean, and if I don’t know, I know how to look it up and find out for myself. Just stick with the story and nothing but the story. Stop talking down to me like I’m a little kid who don’t know nothing!

    You got a chip on your shoulder? You got a cause to promote? You got an issue to protest? You want to save my soul from hell by getting me to join your church? Write a pamphlet and hand it out on the streets – build a web site – start a blog – do something to tell people about it, but don’t take it out on me your reader! Sure, maybe I agree with you, maybe I want to support your cause too, but there is a right way and a wrong way to get supporters, and strategically lacing your novel with preaching and lectures is the WRONG way to do it! Just stick with the story and nothing but the story. Stop preaching to me like I’m the enemy!

(3) What one thing do you wish there were more (or less) of in YA fiction?

    Vampires.

    I want more vampires. And yet, I want less vampires. Actually, I want vampires to be vampires. Just tell your vampire he is a vampire and that he had better start acting like one fast or you are going to kick him out of your book.

    Glittery skin – okay, that’s cool. I like glittering skin. (Hey, I love Liberace~!) I’m okay with the whole sparkling vampires thing, I’d like to see more vampires that sparkled. Oh wait. I haven’t seen a vampire that sparkled yet, have I? Nope. I haven’t.

    Vampires are mean. Vampires are evil. Vampires rape teenage girls. Vampires drink blood. Vampires slash your throat. Vampires kill you. Vampires are scary. Vampires are . . . well, vampires! If you don’t know what a vampire is, or you think you might know but you aren’t sure – READ DRACULA. Dracula was a vampire. A REAL vampire. Everything I just listed above – Dracula did, and he did it a lot. Dracula was a vampire. Dracula was evil. Dracula did things that Edward couldn’t even comprehend.

    Every where I turn I see a new vampire book. I grab it and start reading it and than I think: “Huh? That’s NOT a vampire. Why are they calling this guy a vampire? This book ain’t about vampires. Where are the vampires?

    STOP TELLING ME YOUR BOOK IS ABOUT VAMPIRES IF IT’S NOT ABOUT 100% REAL BAD-ASS VAMPIRES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I don’t want wishy-washy whampire wannabes. I want the REAL THING! Give me another Dracula! Give me a vampire that sends me hiding under the bed at night. Give me a vampire that scares me. I love vampires. I hate whampire wannabes. Give me vampires – REAL vampires, that make me want to hang garlic over every window and door after I get done reading your book. Don’t water them down and make them nice. Vampires are not nice. Don’t think you have to make your vampires priss-ants because I’m too young to handle real vampires. First time I read Dracula I was 12 years old for crying out loud! Give me real vampires. Scary vampires. I’m a big girl – I can take it.

    Vampires are vampires. If you are going to create a new creature than stop being lazy and give them a new name! Don’t call them vampires because you are too lazy to think up a new name for your new creation. Stop trying to recreate the wheel. It was invented already! A vampire is a monster – deal with it. If you can’t handle real vampires, than stop writing about them!

    Please, please, pleeeeeeeeeease write a vampire book, one that’s actually about – well – you know – vampires – real ones. I hate having to sift through stacks of whampire books to try to find the one or two rare volumes that are actually about REAL vampires.

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Top 25 Clichés in YA novels (A NaNoWriMo Post)

Saturday, November 7, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Was reading Top 25 Clichés in YA novels and had to respond to her list.

Lets see how many of these thing I did/do in real life, shall we?

    #25 – Vegetarian teens with unsympathetic meat-eating parents
    I was a vegan teen who grew up on a poultry farm. My parents were very unsympathetic.

#24 – Shy or withdrawn characters that take refuge in the school’s art room/ compassionate art teachers

    I have Autism – I have barely spoken a full paragraph in my entire life – I was constantly teased and bullied by students because of it and my only refuge was – huh – my art teacher’s class room – how odd – oh yeah, and my art teacher btw was Kevin Hawkes – a young, not yet famous Kevin Hawkes; I was in his class the day his first book got accepted and he brought all the original canvases in to class to show us (the guy is a picture book author/illustrator who today has won nearly every award and children’s author and illustrator can win)

#23 – A token black friend among a group of white friends – usually it’s a girl, and she’s always gorgeous

    In my town of 12k people there is only 1 black family. Just one.

#22 – A tiny scar through the eyebrow, sometimes accompanied by an embarrassing story

    I have a scar under my nose across my lip – the only remaining evidence that at age 16 I had to have plastic surgery after one of our roosters mauled my face with his spurs

# 21 – Using the word ‘rents for parents, but not using any other slang# 20 – A beautiful best friend who gets all the guys but doesn’t want them

    I was accused of being that girl – often. Other girls refused to talk to me because of it. Thing was I had one boyfriend, who I started dating at age 12, and today 22 years later am still with and he’s still the only guy I’ve ever dated – the other guys that followed me around ignoring the other girls, got ignored by me because I already had the guy I wanted and just wanted these dolts to get off my trail

#19 – The wicked stepmother who turns out to be simply misunderstood and it’s all cleared up in the climax#18 – Authors showing their age by naming characters names they grew up with (i.e. Debbie, Lisa, Kimberly, Alice, Linda, etc.)

    uhm . . . since when did THOSE names become dated? I could see if it was Rose, Opal, or Pearl, you know, names not seen since the 1930’s, but heck, new babies show up every day with the names she picked.

#17 – Parents who are professional writers or book illustrators

    uhm . . . I’m a professional writer, so are several of my uncles and aunts, and heck Kevin Hawkes himself was my teacher when I was a teen! How many writers do you know who DO NOT have kids? Aren’t we supposed to *write what we know*?

#16 – Using coffee, cappuccino, and café latte to describe black people’s skin#15 – Main characters named Hannah and making a note of it being a palindrome

    One of the girls in my class in the 1980’s was named Hannah and she used to walk into class every day and the first thing she would say was : “My name is Hannah, I can spell it the same way forwards and backwards, you can’t do that with your name!”. In fact she said it to every one she meet all day long, every day, for years.

#14 – Younger siblings who are geniuses, adored by everyone, and usually run away during the book’s climax, causing dramatic tension

    yeah – Did I mention I have Autism? My IQ is 138. Less than .03% of the world’s population has an IQ over 130. I started reading and writing at age 3. I wrote volume 1 of the Twighlight Manor series in 1978 – yes, I was only 3 years old when I wrote that book. Adults used word “prodigy” and “indigo child” all the time. I hated it. Many times I thought about running away.

#13 – The mean-spirited cheerleader (and her gang) as the story’s antagonist

    I knew one of them.

# 12 – A dead mother

    about half the kids I knew growing up had one parent or the other – dead, gone to war, in jail/prison, or left home/divorced – in fact I was just about the only kid in school who actually had BOTH parents

# 11 – Heroines who can’t carry a tune, even if it were in a bucket

    I can’t sing, never could

# 10 – Guys with extraordinarily long eyelashes

    many local guys wear not only mascara, but also fake eyelashes – it’s pretty common actually, and not just with teenaged guys either

# 9 – The popular boy dating the dorky heroine to make his former girlfriend jealous, and then breaking the heroine’s heart# 8 – The diary, either as the entire format, or the occasional entry

    One of my favorite books of all time is Dracula and is written in diary format – oh look, my favorite author Edgar Alan Poe wrote like that too! *shock* – and guess what, the first books I ever read were the “Little House” Books, uhm, those were not just written as a dairy – it ACTUALLY WAS her dairy!

# 7 – Fingernail biting

    drives me crazy when I see people biting their nails – I can’t stand it, but wait, almost every one I know does it!

# 6 – Characters who chew on their lip or tongue in times of stress – usually until they taste blood

    name a person who DOES NOT do this – name one – try it – you can’t

# 5 – Raising one eyebrow

    name a person who DOES NOT do this – name one – try it – you can’t

# 4 – Main characters who want to be writers

    1.5 million new titles are published EVERY YEAR, 70% of all writers never write more than 3 books in their entire life time – that’s a lots of kids wanting to be writers when they grow up and hey, I was one of them!

# 3 – Calling parents by their first names

    I know several kids who do this. I always thought it weird that they did it, but there they are – doing just that

# 2 – Best friends with red hair*

    I know at least 30 red heads (natural) and many more who dye their hair red (and yes, 7 year old girls DO dye their hair)

And the number one thing found in YA novels…#1 – Lists

    name a person who DOES NOT write lists – name one – try it – you can’t – and a character that writes lists or finds a list is in almost every book ever written at every time in history – try finding a book from ANY age group that doesn’t have a list in it – heck, she listed this on a LIST herself for crying out loud!!!!!!!

I do got to wonder, if so many of these things happen in real life, than how are they cliche in fiction? What is she saying that REAL LIFE is cliche and we shouldn’t be writing about it? What ever happened to the writing law of : Write what you know?

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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Top 25 Clichés in YA novels (A NaNoWriMo Post)

Saturday, November 7, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Was reading Top 25 Clichés in YA novels and had to respond to her list.

Lets see how many of these thing I did/do in real life, shall we?

    #25 – Vegetarian teens with unsympathetic meat-eating parents

    I was a vegan teen who grew up on a poultry farm. My parents were very unsympathetic.

#24 – Shy or withdrawn characters that take refuge in the school’s art room/ compassionate art teachers

    I have Autism – I have barely spoken a full paragraph in my entire life – I was constantly teased and bullied by students because of it and my only refuge was – huh – my art teacher’s class room – how odd – oh yeah, and my art teacher btw was Kevin Hawkes – a young, not yet famous Kevin Hawkes; I was in his class the day his first book got accepted and he brought all the original canvases in to class to show us (the guy is a picture book author/illustrator who today has won nearly every award and children’s author and illustrator can win)

#23 – A token black friend among a group of white friends – usually it’s a girl, and she’s always gorgeous

    In my town of 12k people there is only 1 black family. Just one.

#22 – A tiny scar through the eyebrow, sometimes accompanied by an embarrassing story

    I have a scar under my nose across my lip – the only remaining evidence that at age 16 I had to have plastic surgery after one of our roosters mauled my face with his spurs

# 21 – Using the word ‘rents for parents, but not using any other slang

# 20 – A beautiful best friend who gets all the guys but doesn’t want them

    I was accused of being that girl – often. Other girls refused to talk to me because of it. Thing was I had one boyfriend, who I started dating at age 12, and today 22 years later am still with and he’s still the only guy I’ve ever dated – the other guys that followed me around ignoring the other girls, got ignored by me because I already had the guy I wanted and just wanted these dolts to get off my trail

#19 – The wicked stepmother who turns out to be simply misunderstood and it’s all cleared up in the climax

#18 – Authors showing their age by naming characters names they grew up with (i.e. Debbie, Lisa, Kimberly, Alice, Linda, etc.)

    uhm . . . since when did THOSE names become dated? I could see if it was Rose, Opal, or Pearl, you know, names not seen since the 1930’s, but heck, new babies show up every day with the names she picked.

#17 – Parents who are professional writers or book illustrators

    uhm . . . I’m a professional writer, so are several of my uncles and aunts, and heck Kevin Hawkes himself was my teacher when I was a teen! How many writers do you know who DO NOT have kids? Aren’t we supposed to *write what we know*?

#16 – Using coffee, cappuccino, and café latte to describe black people’s skin

#15 – Main characters named Hannah and making a note of it being a palindrome

    One of the girls in my class in the 1980’s was named Hannah and she used to walk into class every day and the first thing she would say was : “My name is Hannah, I can spell it the same way forwards and backwards, you can’t do that with your name!”. In fact she said it to every one she meet all day long, every day, for years.

#14 – Younger siblings who are geniuses, adored by everyone, and usually run away during the book’s climax, causing dramatic tension

    yeah – Did I mention I have Autism? My IQ is 138. Less than .03% of the world’s population has an IQ over 130. I started reading and writing at age 3. I wrote volume 1 of the Twighlight Manor series in 1978 – yes, I was only 3 years old when I wrote that book. Adults used word “prodigy” and “indigo child” all the time. I hated it. Many times I thought about running away.

#13 – The mean-spirited cheerleader (and her gang) as the story’s antagonist

    I knew one of them.

# 12 – A dead mother

    about half the kids I knew growing up had one parent or the other – dead, gone to war, in jail/prison, or left home/divorced – in fact I was just about the only kid in school who actually had BOTH parents

# 11 – Heroines who can’t carry a tune, even if it were in a bucket

    I can’t sing, never could

# 10 – Guys with extraordinarily long eyelashes

    many local guys wear not only mascara, but also fake eyelashes – it’s pretty common actually, and not just with teenaged guys either

# 9 – The popular boy dating the dorky heroine to make his former girlfriend jealous, and then breaking the heroine’s heart

# 8 – The diary, either as the entire format, or the occasional entry

    One of my favorite books of all time is Dracula and is written in diary format – oh look, my favorite author Edgar Alan Poe wrote like that too! *shock* – and guess what, the first books I ever read were the “Little House” Books, uhm, those were not just written as a dairy – it ACTUALLY WAS her dairy!

# 7 – Fingernail biting

    drives me crazy when I see people biting their nails – I can’t stand it, but wait, almost every one I know does it!

# 6 – Characters who chew on their lip or tongue in times of stress – usually until they taste blood

    name a person who DOES NOT do this – name one – try it – you can’t

# 5 – Raising one eyebrow

    name a person who DOES NOT do this – name one – try it – you can’t

# 4 – Main characters who want to be writers

    1.5 million new titles are published EVERY YEAR, 70% of all writers never write more than 3 books in their entire life time – that’s a lots of kids wanting to be writers when they grow up and hey, I was one of them!

# 3 – Calling parents by their first names

    I know several kids who do this. I always thought it weird that they did it, but there they are – doing just that

# 2 – Best friends with red hair*

    I know at least 30 red heads (natural) and many more who dye their hair red (and yes, 7 year old girls DO dye their hair)

And the number one thing found in YA novels…
#1 – Lists

    name a person who DOES NOT write lists – name one – try it – you can’t – and a character that writes lists or finds a list is in almost every book ever written at every time in history – try finding a book from ANY age group that doesn’t have a list in it – heck, she listed this on a LIST herself for crying out loud!!!!!!!

I do got to wonder, if so many of these things happen in real life, than how are they cliche in fiction? What is she saying that REAL LIFE is cliche and we shouldn’t be writing about it? What ever happened to the writing law of : Write what you know?

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

http://twitter.com/EelKat
http://www.facebook.com/EelKat
http://eknano.blogspot.com

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Vampire discussion: the technical aspects (A NaNoWriMo Post) (reposted – updated and much longer version)

Friday, November 6, 2009 · 1 Comment

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So, I’ve been reading all the Vampire Threads on NaNoWriMo, when I found this one on: Vampire discussion: the technical aspects and this one Vampire Guidlines…?, and they inspired me to spend the last 3 hours figuring out who and what my vampires are and than writing up an answer. YOW! What a long post this one is!

Here is my answer:

There are different types of vampires in my way of thinking, but for the book I am currently working on there are just two types of vampires, which I refer to as: True Vampires and Common Vampires. As you will notice from my answers, my entire vampire system is based largely on Dracula the book and Bela Lugosi’s representation of the Dracula movie. So basically if it isn’t happening in either the book or Bela Lugosi’s version of the book, than you can bet it isn’t going to happen in my book either. my vampire’s are pretty much straight up Classic Dracula Style Vampires. (My other types of vampires – the ones not in my NaNovel 09 – are quite different from the True Vampires and the Common Vampires I am focusing on today.)

My personal guidelines (for True Vampires and Common Vampires, as seen in my NaNovel 2009) are as follows:

Creation:

“True Vampires” are evil men who were too evil for Hell and are cursed to walk the Earth forever, neither dead no alive and are thus Undead. They are humans whose souls have been condemned. Some men who are really black hearted, like Count Dracula (who is the main vampire in my book btw) can use black magic (aka super evil deeds and calling on demons for help) to turn themselves into a vampire. “True Vampires” are extremely rare, as few people are wicked enough to become one. They are immortal and can not be killed or defeated in any way, shape, or form, they can only be temporarily stopped, imprisoned, or delayed, which only lasts until they escape and rise again.

“Common Vampires” are people who became vampires by being bitten by a “True Vampire”. They do not turn with just one bite. It takes a series of bites over many days. With each bite they grow weaker and become paler and more mindless/hypnotized. These are more like zombies than vampires. They are mindless drones who do the bidding of the True Vampire that turned them. Because they are humans who bodies were possessed (as opposed to humans who’s souls are condemned) and thus are not actually 100% dead, but rather in a sort of animated coma, they are not immortal, can be killed, thus saving their souls from being lost.

For most Common Vampires, a stake through the heart will release them from the True Vampire’s spell. For those that have been under the True Vamps spell for a really long time, they may also require decapitation, because the True Vamp’s hold on them is very strong.

An added Note: Only the True Vamp that turned them into a Common Vamp has the power to control them. In other words an alternate True Vamp could not come in and give the Common Vamp orders, because they are hypnotized and will only obey the True Vamp whom they refer to as “Master”.

Physical Features:

What does your vampire look like?

“True Vampires” are usually men (as women rarely commit the horrendous acts of evil required to become a True Vamp). They look just as they did before they died, only their skin is much paler and their bodies are as cold as ice. However they dresses and acted when they were alive, is how they continue to dress and act as the Undead.

“Common Vampires” are not yet dead. They are zombie-like victims of a True Vamp’s spell. Common Vampires tends to be woman, because True Vampires have a tendency to go after female humans more often than male humans. They look exactly as they did before being bitten, except that they have a pale bloodless look to them, dark circles around their eyes, they have blood shot, blank, empty staring eyes. They look dead. They walk around in a trance, and no longer act like themselves. They kind of just stand around waiting for the True Vamp to give them orders and tell them what to do.

Do they retain their humanity? Do they have a conscience? Or have they detached? Do they have two sides to themselves, is the vampire a separate personality (more like a possession or a demon) with their human side fighting against it (or not as the case may be).

However they acted, thought, felt, talked, etc before they were a vampire, they continue to act. Their personality remains the same. Keeping in mind that they were most likely a cruel, emotionless serial killer before they died (which would be the type of person who would be condemned to walk eternity as a True Vampire), that means they are likely to be a cruel, emotionless serial killer after they died as well. In other words the type of person who would get turned into a True Vampire would be some one like Jack the Ripper, Adolf Hitler, or of course Prince Vlad Dracule III (who is the real life prince whom became the fictional Count Dracula btw), so if a True Vampire showed up, you can bet his pretty darned evil or he would not have become a vampire to begin with.

Like wise it is possible for them to have a change of heart and repent and try to spend eternity making amends for their prior wrongful deeds. In such a case, where they truly had a 100% change of heart and repented, they could move on in life and work towards becoming a guardian angel and than spend eternity helping mortals.

Do your vampires have growing hair and fingernails? Do their hair and nails still grow? Or are they trapped how they looked when they were turned (Anne Rice’s vampires revert to how they looked when the died upon waking every evening. One character cuts her hair off every night.)

Not sure about the True Vampires, seeing how they are dead and all. I’ll have to think about that some more. They are sort of trapped in how they looked when they died. They age though – really fast if they go to long without blood. But once they’s had blood they revert back to the way they looked at the time they died.

The Common Vampires do have growing hair and fingernails, because they are not actually dead.

– Eyes – Are their eyes unnatural? A strange colour? Do they change colour depending on whether they’ve fed? (Twilight) Do they have a certain vividness to them, a strange gleam? (See Anne Rice). Do their eyes change when they’re about to attack? (See Game Face) or do they have normal human eyes? Can they see in the dark? Does this give them a light sensitivity? Do their eyes glow or have animalistic traits?

Their eyes are whatever color they had before the became a vampire.

A True Vampire’s eyes look the same a when they were alive, except when they hypnotize their victims than their eyes have and “animal glow” to them (like when lights hit an animal’s eyes at night.) Their eyes are described as “glowing like hot coals” or “burning like fire balls” when they feed on blood – they sort of go into a frenzy over blood, and that’s when their eyes start glowing.

They can see in the dark, in fact they can see in the dark better than in the day (like a cat or an owl) which is part of the reason they come out at night rather than during the day.

A Common Vampire, which is not dead, just mesmerized, looks the same, except they have dark circles around their eyes, and they have blood shot, blank, empty staring eyes. Like a dead person, the color is gone from their eyes, due to the extremely dilated pupils. In other words, they look dead.

– Game face – When about to attack, do they physically change? Do their entire features twist and contort (Buffy) or do their eyes change at all? (Moonlight has eyes going pale blue, Being human had them going black).

See my answer above for info about their eyes.

I never liked how the Buffy vamps twisted all out of shape into grotesque monsters. My vamps don’t do that – though the True Vamps could if they wanted too, seeing how they can shape-shift (usually into wolves, bats, etc.)

True Vamps tend to have a heightened sexual appeal just before attacking, (they seem sexier, irresistible, gorgeous, etc) thus attracting the opposite sex to them, making it easy for them to lure their victim to them with less resistance.

Common Vamps do not shape shift or change appearance, they remain in their zombie like state.

– Fangs – Do they have fangs? (some vampires have a piercing tongue or sting instead) Are these fangs just elongated canines or lateral incisors? Are they hollow like a snake and secrete venom? Are they very sharp or just pointed enough to make biting a little bit easier? Do they grow back if lost? Do they retract? Alternately, do they have rows upon rows of sharp teeth (30 days of night) instead of just the usual fangs? How long are they? (TruBlood vampires have very long fangs). – I have a vampire race who don’t have any fangs at all, they use knives to draw blood.

Depends on the book. I tend to change this to match the particular vamp I’m writing about. In some stories they have long snake like fangs that drip venom – very Cobra/Rattlesnake/Pit Viper – very sharp and deadly. In other stories they have near normal teeth, with only slightly more pointed upper canines – just pointed enough to draw blood.

My most often used reoccurring vamp (the sparkling silver skinned drag queen, seen only in my banned M-Rated adult books, The Twighlight Manor Series; and these books were written in the 1970s through 1980’s btw, nearly 30 years before Twilight’s sparkling vampires, which has caused some of my fans to point to Twilight and scream plagiarism, seeing how she used so many things out of my books, including the title) is a salamander mermen and thus has row after row after row of sharp piranha like teeth.

– Claws – Do they have claws at all? Are these more like animal claws or talons or simply long, very sharp nails?

Claws are one of the first things people notice about my True Vampires. They are somewhat like eagle talons. Very sharp and made for tearing flesh.

In my adult books, the drag queen vamps keep them cut in a more human like manner, and also paint them.

The Common Vamps have normal nails.

– Pallor – Are they pale? Are they blue, green, yellow? or some other unnatural shade. Are they deathly looking? Is their skin supple and soft to the touch or hard and stony/marble-like? (Twilight, Anne Rice) Is it more like the skin of a corpse? Is there any reason for any of this?

They are very, very pale, nearly as white as snow. Some have a ashen grey tint, others are stark white. They look dead and bloodless. Their skin remains soft to the touch.

– Can they shape change? Into what? (Bats, wolves and vermin are most common). If not into animals, can they become mist?

Depends on the story. Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

Common Vamps do not shape shift or change appearance, they remain in their zombie like state.

– Are they unnaturally beautiful? Do they just retain their normal human appearance? Are they hideous and deformed (Nosferatu). Does their appearance change depending on whether they’ve fed or not? (E.g: Do they retain their youth if fed but become hag-like without blood? Do they get a flush of life from feeding (warmer to touch, blushed skin etc). Do their eyes dull without blood? Do they become sluggish and sick looking?)

True Vampires look as they did before they died, but they tend to have a heightened sexual appeal just before attacking, (they seem sexier, irresistible, gorgeous, etc) thus attracting the opposite sex to them, making it easy for them to lure their victim to them with less resistance.

If they go too long without blood, they start to age rapidly, losing their eternal youth. They require blood, not to stay alive, but rather to stay youthful and to prevent themselves from turning into a dried up skeletal corpse with dehydrated “beef-jerky” skin. Drinking blood keeps them soft and fleshy. Vampires that refuse to drink blood, turn into dried up prunes and gain a skeletal grim reaper look to them. Just after feeding on blood they gain a warmer, rosy glow, and a slightly bloated look. They tend to sleep just after feeding, and by the time they awake a few hours later the rosy glow and bloated look has gone away.

Common Vamps rarely attack, and do not shape shift or change appearance, they just remain in their zombie like state and await orders from their master. They only attack humans if commanded to by the master.

– Do they have any physical abnormalities? (One nostril, furry feet, a bare skull etc. One vampire legend even has a creature who’s skin is blackened from the funeral pyre, another had metal teeth and hooked feet.)

Only if they already had physical abnormalities prior to becoming a vampire, do they have physical abnormalities afterwards. They can however be damaged in battle (lose an arm, get a gashed face, etc.) and thus gain physical abnormalities after becoming a vampire.

– Are all of their kind only one gender? (Some vampires across the world are only male or only female)

“True Vampires” are usually men (as women rarely commit the horrendous acts of evil required to become a True Vamp).

Common Vampires tends to be woman, because True Vampires have a tendency to go after female humans more often than male humans (unless of course they are gay). The choice of who to attack is a very sexual thing. True Vamps tend to use sexual attraction in order to get their victim close enough to them, in order the bite their neck.

In my children’s books, this fact is never mentioned, however the “law” remains the same: True Vampires are nearly always male and Common Vampires are nearly always female.

– Can they move soundlessly?

True Vamps can, yep. They are know for “appearing out of no where”, not because they magically appeared, but because no one heard them come into the room, thus it seems like they magically appeared from out of no where.

Common Vampires are not so stealthy. Being in a zombie like trance, they tend to be some what clumsy and may walk into things.

Biology:

What makes your vampire a vampire

Being a parasite, like a leach that needs a host, is the only real requirement to make a vampire a vampire.

True Vampires need blood from a host and are undead. This is what makes them a vampire.

Common Vampires, are not really vampires, they are just mistaken for vampires because they look like True Vampires and are in a trance by the True Vampire that controls them. Common Vampires are in fact Zombies, not vampires. They serve as hosts and slaves of the True Vampires. They are not dead. They do not drink blood unless commanded to by their True Vampire Master. They have no free will of their own.

As I said before, I have many types of vampires and not all of them feed on blood or are undead. The True Vampires and the Common Vampires are the only two being used in my NaNovel ‘09 so those are the only two I’ve been mentioning in my answers here.

In addition to those two types, however, I have also used others

    My Twighlight Manor Electric Eel Sirens are mer-folk vampires (and are a type of Fae or Faerie). They are very much alive, can be killed, and may or may not feed on the blood of their victims. They are only seen in my M-rated stories, because they are highly sexual and prey on human victims for sex, rather than for blood. They feed on the life force of humans, leaving their victims near comatose after an attack (an attack being more or less rape.) They are somewhat akin to incubus and succubus.My Twighlight Manor Phookas, likewise are alive and can be killed, but are incredibly strong and can snap a full grown man’s bones with their bare hands, so killing one is not easy. These are the darkest of my vampires, very much an animalistic monster, and a type of Fae or Faerie, best described as being a sort of demon. These human looking creatures, act like frenzied sharks and will not only drink the blood of their victims, but will also tear them limb from limb and gorge themselves on human flesh. These shape shifters can look like anything or any one – they are commonly known to look like your lover/spouse, in order to trick you into bed with them, where they have violent sex with you (usually killing you by the time they are done), than eat you in a very black widow manner.Yeah – my Twighlight Manor books are pretty dark, violent, sadistic, and full of sex crazed, blood sucking, flesh eating, drag queen, cannibal vampires. It pushes all the limits and is high on graphic sex and brutal violence. My Twighlight Manor vampires can’t go any where’s near a YA or children’s book, so that’s why I’m not focusing on them in this question and answer session here.

– Do they breathe?

True vampires = They must, though I never thought about it before.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead.

– Do they have a heartbeat? If so, is it fast? Erratic? Slow?

True vampires = They must, though I never thought about it before.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead. In their zombie like state, I would assume it to be very slow though.

– Are they actually dead? Did they rise from the grave? (Some legends mention corpses coming to life if a cat jumps over the grave or if moonlight crosses the body)

True vampires are actually dead, but have not left their body and have not passed of their either Heaven or Hell, because they were so wicked and did such evil acts while they were alive, that they are cursed to walk eternity as the undead – a fate worse than hell.

Common Vampires? They are not dead. They are hapless victims of True Vampires.

– Are they immortal or do they still age? If immortal, do they get bored of living and destroy themselves? Dig themselves in and sleep for a few centuries? (Lestat slept for several centuries and emerged in the 1980s. The vampires in the World Of Darkness often do this). Does the magic keeping them “alive” only last so many centuries?

True Vampires are immortal; doomed to walk the earth for ever and ever. They can never dead, because they are already dead. You can temporarily defeat them, but you can never kill them, because they are already dead. They keep coming back. They always come back.

There is no rest for the wicked. They retreat during the day, but may or may not sleep. Sleep for centuries is not a thing they could do even if they wanted to. They can become trapped in a coffin for centuries, but they do not spend that time asleep, rather they spend it howling with rage and frustration as they try to claw their way out of the coffin. Once trapped in their coffin the only way they can escape is if some one still alive releases them yy opening the coffin. Thus it is possible for centuries to pass before they “return from the grave”.

Common Vampires, unless released from their True Vampire Master’s trance, will die a week or so after becoming his prey. Sometimes they are turned into True Vampires by their Master, but this is a rare occurrence that only happens when the True Vamp decides he wants to keep the Common Vamp as his bride.

– Are they cold to the touch? Room temperature? Hot?

True Vampires are cold. Very cold. Think, like you just stuck your hand in a vat of liquid nitrogen or dry ice, when you shake hands with them. This cold is so penetrating, that you can feel cold ait wafting off of their body, before you even get really close to them.

Common Vampires, being humans in a trance, are still warm, though they may feel slightly colder than is normal due to their being nightly drained of more blood by the True Vamp that is controlling them. Eventually (after a couple of weeks) they will die from blood loss and the True Vampire will seek out a new victim/host.

The best sure way to tell a Common Vampire from a True Vampire is to shake hands with them. The Common Vampire will still feel somewhat warm, while the True Vampire will feel like you have a hand full of dry ice.

– Can they reproduce? Does that ahem, area, work at all?

In my adult stories, sex seems to be what drives a True Vampire to attack their victims. They have a strong sexual desire, but the desires can not be fulfilled (part of their punishment, is that they must spend eternity wanting things they can not have, sex being the top of the list of things they want and can never have.) This is why they lure their victims in, than suddenly go into a rage and drain them of their blood.

In my children’s books this subject (sex/reproduction/etc.) is never mentioned, alluded to, or hinted at in any way or form.

– Do they need to sleep? If so, how often and for how long? Is this a “sleep of the dead” (as in, they show no signs of life at all and are basically a corpse) or more like normal human sleep? Do they dream? Do they sleep in a coffin or have to keep native soil on them? (some stories have the vampire sleeping in several inches of blood (Carmilla)

How they Sleep:

The True Vamps: They sleep during the day. They can sleep where ever they want. They don’t have to sleep in their coffin, though some just seem to do so for some unknown reason. Most prefer to keep the coffin hidden away somewhere and avoid sleeping in it, in order to avoid becoming trapped in it, as trapping a vampire in it’s coffin is the best way to imprison it for centuries. They must however have the dirt from their grave with them. Thus they may keep a box of dirt under their bed, or fill their coffin with dirt, etc.

It’s not so much that they actually NEED the dirt, as it is, they are very, extremely OCD and are compelled to have the dirt with them, otherwise they simply toss and turn, unable to sleep because all they can think about is how they need their grave dirt their with them. It’s a psychological thing sort of like the kid that can not sleep without a teddy bear and a night light.

There is no rest for the wicked. They retreat during the day, but may or may not sleep and their sleep is far from restful. Sleep for centuries is not a thing they could do even if they wanted to. They can become trapped in a coffin for centuries, but they do not spend that time asleep, rather they spend it howling with rage and frustration as they try to claw their way out of the coffin. Once trapped in their coffin the only way they can escape is if some one still alive releases them yy opening the coffin. Thus it is possible for centuries to pass before they “return from the grave”.

The Common Vamps don’t really sleep, they just sort of stand there waiting for the True Vamp to give them orders.

– Can they sweat? If not, does this lead to problems dealing with temperature shifts? Do they sweat blood? Conversely, can they cry?

True vampires = I never thought about it before. I don’t think they can sweat or cry. I’ve never known any of mine to do either, so they must not be able to, though I do not have an explanation as to why this would be.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead. They are not likely to cry though, due to their trance like state.

– Can they be active during the day? What happens if they go into sunlight? (Do they combust? Or do they just run the risk of dehydrating. If they sparkle, kill this character NOW) Does sunlight strip them of their powers (Dracula) or have no affect at all? Does it hurt their eyes? Does it burn? Do they tan?

Because of their super pale skin, they have no resistance to UV rays and thus get super wicked horrendously awful sunburns, wick, do not kill them, but will weaken them something fierce. They do however get a stronger resistance to sunlight the older they get, so Count Dracula can go out during the day, providing the UV factor isn’t too high (ie – on cloudy, overcast, or foggy days), but their sensitivity to sunlight does weaken them so they don’t do it if they don’t have to.

This applies to both True and Common Vamps, due to their pale skin.

– Healing. Can they heal unnaturally fast or do they have to feed to heal? Can they heal at all? Does it leave a scar? Can they regenerate lost limbs? Not heal from certain damage inflicted to certain areas (Heart, Brain etc) or by certain materials? (Wood, Silver, cold iron etc). Do they heal so quickly they run the risk of healing over bullets and such forth? (thus needing reopen the wound to dig them out) or does their body push out foreign objects as it heals? (Like Wolverine in the second X-men movie lol)

True Vampires heal very fast, mostly while they are sleeping. They can be wounded, injured, and weakened, and will return to their coffin to sleep and re energize. A wound that would kill a live mortal, will only slow down and weaken the undead immortal True Vampire. A wound that in a mortal would take weeks to heal, would heal in a True Vampire in just one night (or two). It’s not an instant heal, but pretty close to it.

Common Vampires, being humans in an animated coma, are weaker than normal and thus are easily wounded, easily put out of commission, and have a very slow ability to heal. They are thus easily defeated, easily killed, and their true purpose is to serve as a device to slow up any attack on the True Vampire and allow him extra time to escape.

– Are they unnaturally fast? Strong? How fast? How strong?

True Vampires: yes
Common Vampires: no.

True Vampires can move faster, or rather they seem to move faster because they are so silent when they move. I;m not sure if they are actually moving faster or if it’s just and illusion caused by the fact that you never hear them coming.

They are very strong. A True Vampire can easily crush and man’s neck or lift him up by gripping his throat, just using one hand.

Common Vampires are much slower than normal, due to their weakened state from loss of blood and due to their being in a trance. They are also far weaker than normal, for the same reasons.

Can they get sick? If not, do they carry disease? Can they infect their victims with this illness?

True vampires = They must, though I never thought about it before. But yes, I would assume they could get sick and/or carry illnesses and spread them to their victims. I’ve just never had occasion to use such events in any of my stories as yet.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead.

– Do they bleed?

True vampires = I don’t think they can bleed, seeing how they are dead and all. I’ve never known any of mine to bleed, so they must not be able to, though I do not have an explanation as to why this would be. It is one of the ways to tell a True Vampire from a Common Vampire.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead. It is one of the ways to tell a True Vampire from a Common Vampire.

Tell-tale signs:

How can others tell it’s a vampire?

Number one best way: shake their hand. They are colder than a deep freeze. You can probably tell before you shake their hand, as the room gets colder when they enter it, because their body is like it’s giving off dry ice.

In Filipino legend, a specially prepared oil of coconut and various herbs would begin to boil if a vampire was nearby. Does this sort of thing ever happen?

Yak Butter turns rancid when True Vamps are around. This weird fact was created by me as a result of a NaNoWriMo DARE. :)

Another sort of vampire caused blights, crops would fail and plants wither in their presence. Does this sort of thing ever happen?

The trees and grass and plants around a True Vamp’s house are always dead and brown and shriveled up. I believe this may be largely due to prolonged exposure to the cold air that the True Vampires give off.

Do they cast a shadow? Is it a normal shadow?

I have no idea. They so rarely go outside on sunny days that I never noticed.

Do they show up in photographs? If so, do they show up normally?

The do not photograph. The photos come out a blurred snow haze, and often cameras stop working after they touch them.

– How do animals react toward them? Hostile? Fearful? Submissive?

Depends on the animal and the vampire. Some react violently and try to attack the vampire. Some are terrified and flee at the presence of the vampire. Some are indifferent and don’t notice the vampire. Some will follow, obey, and help the vampire. I have no idea what causes the difference, nor do I try to explain it.

Can they cross running water?

I see no reason why they can’t. They often do. All my books are set in Southern Maine, where it is next to impossible to go any place without crossing running water of some sort.

Powers/Abilities:

– Do they have magical mystical powers? (Hypnotism, mind control, control animals, shapeshifting, spider climbing, mind reading) Explain how these work. Do they need some sort of focus? (Some vampires had a magical hat, I’m not kidding! How about an amulet or ring of some sort?) – Do they have an unusual method of locomotion? (Hopping? Flying? There’s some who split off their upper torso and others who fly around as a disembodied head. Some even have their feet on backwards)

Common Vampires do not have any special powers or abilities. They are just zombie-drone minions of the True Vampires.

“Regular” True Vampires have the following abilities:

    Movement Abilities: -Inhuman Speed -Unearthly Reflexes-Vertical Ascension (climbs walls)-Gliding (with help of cape)-Bat Form -Mist Form -Flight -Move Silently Offensive Abilities -Fangs -Vampiric Claws -Enhanced Senses-Animalistic Frenzy -Superhuman Strength -Mind Control -Wolf Form-Horrific Transformation-Glamor Defensive Abilities -Fast Healing -Impervious to bullets-Intimidation

“Super Powerful” True Vampires (such as Dracula) also have these additional “rare” abilities:

    Rare Movement Abilities -Clown Frenzy-Astral Projection-Dodge Daylight-Spider Climb-Cat’s Grace-Shadow Conceal Rare Offensive Abilities -Pyrokinesis-Corrosion-Control Mall Santas-Ironic Annihilation-Purge Blood-Pestilence-Mummification-Blood Soaked Vengeance (Carrie)-Hellfire-Demonic Familiar-Bloodletting-Vampire Lord-Summon Horseman-Shadow Transformation-Bone Spikes-Demon Summoning-Telepathy-Drain Youth-Raise Zombies-Invisibility-Shadow Manipulation-Blood to Ashes-Command a Wolf Pack-Command Rat Swarm-Cause Madness-Intoxicating Bite Rare Defensive Abilities -Veil of Thorns-Winged Guard-Premonition-Indestructible-Iron Skin-Create Illusion-Immunity to Religious Icons-Immaterial (can walk through solid walls)-Resistance to Sunlight-Immunity to Silver(This list of abilities was copied from the Zanga Game Vampire Wars, btw) I liked it so I decided to use it for my own vamps.

A Common Vampire can not do any these things. Because they are a drone they have no special powers to speak of. It is one of the ways to tell a True Vampire from a Common Vampire.

Weaknesses/Disabilities: Are they repelled by holy symbols? How about Garlic? What about Prayer? How do you kill them? What repels them? Holy water, religious symbols, garlic, wild rose, salt. Some are repelled by pregnant women (Dhampire: Stillborn) or old women (Fillipino myths).

Can only certain weapons or materials harm them? (Silver, cold iron, consecrated items, certain woods? Plants?)

Any weapon can harm them, it’s just that those made out of iron or blessed with Holy Water do more damage.

    Holy waters: – Can burn skin and temporarily blind, but it depends upon the faith of the person throwing the water. Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, in the hands of an atheist, the holy water would have no effect at all, while in the hands of the Pope it may just disable the vampire for years.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. Silver: Silver is for werewolves NOT vampires. What do you think Dracula’s medallion (the one he always wears round his neck on a red ribbon) is made out of? Iron: Gives of strong energies, which can completely over power a weaker vampire. Even Dracula is effected by it some, though not much. Note that Iron only works on True Vampires, not Common Vampires.Iron horseshoes are hung over doors in barns to keep vampires from draining the cows and horses (real folklore, which I also use in my books).Iron boot scrapers are left on door steps to keep vampires out, because if a vampire (who are all extremely OCD) sees a boot scrape he is compelled to clean his boots and touching the iron sends him packing. (another real folklore that I use in my books.)Coffin nails are made out of iron (more real folklore) to keep a vampire from opening his coffin and coming out of it, thus trapping the vampire in the coffin until such time someone (most likly grave robbers) opens the coffin thus removing the iron nails from the lid.Any sort of coffin nails iron or otherwise will keep a Common Vamp locked in, because of their weakened state. Mirrors: Do they have a reflection? If so, is it normal or twisted? Blurred? Inhuman?: It’s not that vampires do not have a reflection. It’s that they do not recognize their reflection. When they look in the mirror they expect to see themselves looking as they did when they were alive, and they are always shocked and horrified by their ghastly chalk appearance. Thus they refuse to have mirrors near them and will smash any mirror they see.Vampires can be deflected from an attack, by showing them their reflection, which causes them to attack the mirror and than run away in horror. This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires, as Common Vampires in their zombie-like state do not see their reflection or anything else for that matter. Sunlight: Because of their super pale skin, they have no resistance to UV rays and thus get super wicked horrendously awful sunburns, wick, do not kill them, but will weaken them something fierce. They do however get a stronger resistance to sunlight the older they get, so Count Dracula can go out during the day, providing the UV factor isn’t too high (ie – on cloudy, overcast, or foggy days).This applies to both True and Common Vamps, due to their pale skin. Crosses: Same as Holy Water, but not limited to crosses – any religious icon from any faith will work. Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, in the hands of an atheist, the cross would have no effect at all, while in the hands of the Pope it may just disable the vampire for years.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. Holy Land/Church: Can not enter if the congregation is holy and faithful. Same as Holy Water: Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, if the congregation has a lot of hypocrites, sinners, and/or atheists in it, the church would have no effect at all and the vampire could walk right on in with no problems at all, while a congregation filled with super faithful orthodox devotees to their faith could keep a vampire at bay baring him from entering the church and if their faith was strong enough they may be able to weaken and thus disable the vampire for years.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. A True Vamp may send a Common Vamp into the church in his place.Also, even when entering a church full of unfaithful – the invitation to pass the doorway law still applies. See Doorways, below for more info on this. Do they have extremely sensitive hearing? Eye sight? Smell? Can these cause complications? (Strong sense of smell may explain the repulsion to garlic for instance. Sensitive hearing leaves them vulnerable to being deafened by loud noises) Yes. Yes. and Yes. True Vampires have extremely super sensitive hearing, eye sight, taste, and smell. Also their skin is pretty sensitive. The end result of this is, they can’t go outside on sunny days with out risk of severe sunburn and “snow blindness” (temporary blindness caused by bright light). When they do go outside during the day, they wear dark glasses and carry parasols (Chinese rice paper type) to shade their faces.Their cloths have to be made of soft non-allergenic fabrics which is why much of their wardrobe is made of silk, silk velvet, satin silk, spun silk, ect. in order to avoid skin irritation.They like quite neighborhoods away from traffic, children, barking dogs, gangs, etc, due to their overly sensitive hearing. As a result they will often live on the farthest outskirts of town, or in a big well sound proofed house/castle far into the woods or outside of town. When entering a vampire’s house, he will always ask you to remove your shoes and wear soft slippers, so that the sound of your shoes does not give him a headache.Due to their sensitive eyes, they will have only soft light bulbs in their house, if they even use light bulbs at all. They are more likely to use gas lights or kerosene lamps or candles which give off a soft glow. They may have no lights in their house at all, keeping in mind that they can see better in the dark than in the light and so really have no need for lights at all.Their taste buds pick up even the faintest of tastes with an overwhelming power. When they do eat and drink normal foods, they will choose things with very bland flavors – white bread for example. They avoid all things with a strong taste: garlic, onions, chili peppers, etc. Garlic: A big bad super wicked extremely powerful no-no for both True Vampires and Common Vampires. But there is nothing magical about it, it’s an alergy thing. Due to their heightened senses, vampires (both True and Common) are wicked sensitive to strong smells and strong tastes. All strong smells and flavors cause problems for them, so if no garlic is handy, you can throw onions at them too. Garlic however is different. In addition to the strong smell and flavor, True Vampires are especially allergic to the acidic juices of garlic. Garlic burns the flesh of a normal human, causes watery eyes, and stings the tongue. So when used against the sensitivities of a vampire the effect it a hundred times worse than it is on a human. Garlic itches and burns the skin, causes swollen eyes and sinuses, temporarily blinding the vampire, and over all is pretty much effects them as if you had just taken a bath in poison ivy juice. A vampire’s allergies to garlic can put them out of commission and into the sick bed for weeks. Garlic is the number one way to keep a vampire at bay. They simply can not tolerate the “allergy effects”. You can disable and extremely weaken a vampire if you can trick them into eating garlic, and if you can get a string of garlic cloves around their neck. Garlic: A big bad super wicked extremely powerful no-no for both True Vampires and Common Vampires. But there is nothing magical about it, it’s an alergy thing. Due to their heightened senses, vampires (both True and Common) are wicked sensitive to strong smells. Garlic burns the flesh of a normal human, causes watery eyes, and stings the tongue. So when used against the sensitivities of a vampire the effect it a hundred times worse than it is on a human. Garlic is the number one way to keep a vampire at bay. They simply can not tolerate the “allergy effects”. You can disable and extremely weaken a vampire if you can trick them into eating garlic, and if you can get a string of garlic cloves around their neck. Doorways: Can they enter a home uninvited? What happens if they try to do so? (In Let the Right One in, the vampire literally haemorrhages and bleeds from every orifice if they try it, in Buffy and Being Human, it’s like there’s an invisible force barring them.) They can’t cross if it’s personal property unless they are invited in. If the head of the household invites them in, they are able to keep coming back. If any one other than the head of the household invites them in, they must be re invited after each visit, until the head of the household invites them, and than they can keep coming back without farther invitation. This applies only to True Vampires.In most cases they can if it is public building. Say a grocery store or restaurant where “the public is welcomed” to just walk in. Welcome signs, Yes We Are Open Come In sings, ect, all act as an invitation, thus allowing the vampire to enter. However, when there is a sign such as “By Appointment Only”, they could not enter without an invitation.There is no magic or special powers involved in any of this. It’s an OCD thing and is purely psychological. The vampire simply truly believes he can not enter any place without an invitation and thus you could keep a vampire out of your house simply by hanging a sign on your door that says: “Sorry we are closed, come back later”.This also results in vampires only ever entering a public building during it’s open hours. If the sign says open 9AM to 5PM, than the vampire could only enter between 9AM and 5PM, otherwise he would need some one to specifically invite him in between 6PM and 8AM.Common Vampires, because they are humans in a trance are not effected by the invitation rule, and thus the True Vampire will often have a Common Vampire minion, which he can send into houses and do his bidding, without the need of gaining an invite into the house. Wood: Is only a minor deterant. Only sacred woods, such as Hawthorn, Dogwood, RoseWood, etc, have any real effect. It’s a combination of an allergy thing, and the faith of the believer thing. See Holy Water. Mustard Seeds, Matchsticks, Sunflowers Seeds, etc: Do they have a form of OCD? (Some oriental vampires had a compulsion to count grains of rice left scattered, this would distract them till morning stopping them from hunting that night) My Vampires are extremely OCD. It’s on the the things you will see EVERY SINGLE ONE on my vampires with. It’s like becoming a vampire does something to their mind and fills them to overflowing with all sorts of weird phobias that they have no control over.Due to a True Vampires, extremely overblown OCD problems, you can easily escape an attack, by grabbing a handful of whatever small object is near by and tossing them into the air. When they scattered across the floor, the vampire will scramble to pick them all up and count every single one of them. Thus it is handy to keep a bag of mustard seeds, matchsticks, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, pepper corns, marbles, gum balls, or and other small easily scattered object in your pocket.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. Knots and Shoelaces: Once again, due to a True Vampires, extremely overblown OCD problems, you can easily escape an attack, or otherwise slow down a vampire by hanging knotted ribbon or ropes in their path. A common real modern day myth/practice it to tie a pair of sneakers together and than throw them over the telephone wire in front of your house or place of business, to keep vampires out. (Ever wonder why you always see a pair of sneakers hanging from telephone wires in the city – well now you know.) If a vampire is chasing you and you have time, take off your shoes, tie them together and throw them over the nearest wire or tree branch.The purpose of this action is similar to scattered small objects. A vampire, due to his OCD, is compelled to stop whatever he is doing and focus all of his attention on untieing the knots and than placing the ropes, ribbons, or shoes in order, all lined up in a neat row.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. What happens when they’re destroyed? Do they turn to dust? Do they revert to the age they should have been had they been mortal? Do they rapidly decay? Do they just remain looking like a human corpse? True Vampires can not be destroyed – they are immortal undeads, people whom have already died.Common Vampires on the other hand: Because Common Vampires are not actually dead, they can be killed, however, they usually don’t need to be killed to break the spell they are under. All you really need to do is undo the hypnotism that the True Vampire did to them, and than put them on bed rest and give them some blood transfusions. However, people are too stupid to ever think of doing this, and usually react by thinking the only way to protect themselves from the Common Vampire, is to stake it’s heart, cut off it’s head, and bury it’s body face down in a coffin that has had the lid nailed on with iron nails.The hypnotism will wear off on it’s own if you can keep the victim away from the True Vampire that is controlling them. The best way to do this is to put the Common Vampire in a small cabin full of mirrors, with mustard seeds scattered on the roof of the cabin and the floors inside it, and have the Common Vampire wear a crown of garlic on their head and another around their neck. Than, never invite the vampire in, replace the mustard seeds every time he starts removing them, replace the mirrors as fast as he breaks them, and make sure she never removes the garlic cloves from around her neck. After a week or so of this the Vampire Master will give up and look for a new and less well protected victim and the spell will be broken, thus the Common Vampire will come out of their trance and return to their old normal human self again.Can vampirism be cured? If so, how? (In the Lost Boys, killing the head vampire would cure those who had not yet tasted human blood.) See my last answer. – Do they feel pain? Yes, but they are more resistant to it, thus can take quite a bit of pain before the pain becomes unbearable enough for them to back down.Common Vampires, being entranced, feel nothing and will not stop coming at you until you kill them, which is not too hard to do. – Can bullets hurt them? What about other normal weapons? Can they be suffocated or drown? Anything can hurt True Vampires, it just takes a lot more of whatever it is, to do the kind of damage it would do with a human. But, being immortals, their wounds no matter how severe they are, will never kill them.

Blood/Manner of feeding; The all important question of blood:

– Do they feed on blood or life force? Do they also eat flesh?

In my children’s books, the vampires are never actually seen to be drinking blood or attacking humans. It’s hinted to, and every one knows that is what the vampire does when he goes out at night, but it’s never an on screen action. My goal is a scary bedtime story for children, not terrorizing them into sleeping with every light in the house on.

A vampire gone on a frenzy, will eat the flesh as well as drink the blood. In my rather violent (and written for adults) Twighlight Manor series, feeding frenzies are common place, with the vamps going into rabid-like fits attacking their victim and tearing them to pieces, gorging themselves on the blood, drinking it straight from the heart itself after tearing open the chest and ripping out the rib cage, than relishing the heart, eyes, and brain far above all else.

In either case, blood is what keeps a vampire going. They won’t die without the blood, but they will dry up like old brittle bones if they don’t keep drinking it. They will also age and start falling apart (like the CryptKeeper) if they don’t get enough blood. Blood keeps them young, soft, and youthful.

Common Vampires do not eat or drink unless told to by their “master” the True Vampire. Likewise they will only drink blood if told to do so by the True Vamp that controls them.

– Do they need to drink blood to survive? Or are they simply addicted? (Being Human)

See my last answer.

– What happens if they don’t feed?

See my last answer.

– Will animal blood suffice or does it need to be human blood?

Blood is blood, they’ll take whatever is handy at the moment. Human blood is preferred, but whatever is handy will do if no humans are around. Though, my vamps never go after animals in my children’s books, because when I was about 12 I read a vampire book for kids, which had a vampire go after the MCs dog and turn the dog into a vampire, and I had nightmares for weeks after that. So I never write vampires going after animals in any of my children’s stories, and rarely do I do so in my adult stories either.

– Can they drink packaged blood? Or does the anticoagulant make it unpalatable? Do they need to have fresh living blood?

Blood is blood, they’ll take whatever is handy at the moment, but warm, fresh, pulsating blood from a still beating heart is strongly preferred. Cold, stale, unfresh, unpulsating, packaged blood is a last resort if nothing else is available.

– Do they have to drink the blood or can they inject it? Will a blood transfusion work just as well if not better than drinking?

Blood is food, injections will not work.

– Can they eat normal food? What happens if they do?

Though they don’t need to and thus don’t eat normally, they can eat in order to keep up appearances. For example if an unsuspecting human invited them over for a dinner party, they could ea whatever was served (providing such things as garlic and onions or any thing else they are allergic too, were not served).

True Vampires can eat and drink regular normal foods, but these do not seem to sustain them well. The nutrients are not absorbed the way they were when they were alive. As a result they drink blood to get the nutrients, because for some reason it’s the only way they can. No idea why that is, I don’t know much about medical/biology stuff so I didn’t bother to work out all the details. I simply said it and thus that made it so and my readers will just have to take my word for it.

Common Vampires do not eat or drink unless told to by their “master” the True Vampire. Likewise they will only drink blood if told to do so by the True Vamp that controls them.

– Do they bite? Where? (Neck, upper thigh, wrist? Chest?) If they don’t bite, what do they use instead (Fingernails/claws? A knife? A straw)

Neck. The True Vampires almost always, they go for the neck. No. Always. I don’t think I’ve ever written a True Vampire that DIDN’T go straight or the neck.

I did once consider having a vampire that lost it’s teeth, using a straw to drink the blood. I’m guessing the straw would have been sort of a thin metal pipe to stab them in the neck with first. I never wrote that one though, just considered using it for a really elderly vampire that had lost it’s teeth.

Though in my Twighlight Manor series, feeding frenzies are common place, with the Phookan Vamps going into rabid-like fits attacking their victim’s chest and tearing them to pieces, gorging themselves on the blood, drinking it straight from the still beating heart itself after tearing open the chest and ripping out the rib cage and lungs, etc.

How they Bite:

Exactly like Bela Lugosi did in Dracula: Mesmerize victim with flashy wow factor.

*Runs down stairs flapping huge satin cape while jumping from the stairs pretending to fly like superman.* (Or in my more adult books, they do a Tim Curry and flash their sequined underwear at you.) :)

Now that he’s got your attention (and you are wondering what the hell a grown man is doing running around in sequined underwear and flapping his cape at you) – hypnotize them.

“Looook intwo mah eyezzzzzz. You a undah mah conwrol. Ah vant your blood.”

While you stand there wondering what the heck this guy is saying, he takes the opportunity to grab your neck and bite. :)

I just love overblown over the top theatrical vampire stunts. :) I especially love it when they run by flapping their capes. I got a thing for guys in capes (and sequined underwear). :)

So the whole thing is basically “Look at the weird gorgeous guy in the cape running circles around me, I wonder what he’s doing, I wish I could understand what he saying, oh wait, why his biting my neck? Help, he mesmerized me with his flashy cape so long that I didn’t realize he was about to tear my throat out! AAAAArrrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!. . . . yes . . . master . . . . anything you say . . . master.. . . I’m . . . coming . . . master.”

I love Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. Any vampire that doesn’t act like Bela Lugosi isn’t a real vampire in my book. Unless of course he’s acting like Tim Curry’s Dr. Frank-N-Furt, than it’s okay to not act like Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. ;)

If they hunt, how do they do it? Do they have a specific sort of person (only women, only blonds etc etc) or animal they prefer?

I explained this a ways back, but basically all True Vampires are males and all their “Common Vampire) victims are females (unless the True Vampire is gay).

– How often do they need to feed? (every night? Every fortnight? Once a month? )

Depends on the story and how the plot is going. Usually True Vamps need blood every night or at the very least every once every three days.

So, vampires drink blood, but where does it go?

Uhm . . . in their stomach??????????? Seems like the logical place for it to go.

Do they use the bathroom?

I would assume they must. It never occurred to me to think about it.

How much blood are they drinking, anyway?

Who the hell knows. As much as they vant.

Killing One:

You can’t. I sort of already explained that back when I was talking about how they are created.

Society:

How do vampires function politically and socially

True Vampires are pretty much loners and keep to themselves. Because you got to be pretty darn wicked to become one, there actually are not too many True Vampires out there. You are not likely to meet more than one in your entire life time, and there would rarely be more than one in your local town.

Once in a while, a dictorial vampire will come a long and he’ll pretend to be a mortal so as to work his way into politics and take control and use his power to kill lots of humans. (Adolf Hitler for example, in my books, would have been very likely a Vampire, which would explain how he had gained such power so fast.)

Do these vampires have a social hierarchy? How is it sorted? (By age? By power? By merit or by eliminating your rivals? Are they ruled by committee or government or by a single individual? How are these leaders selected or are they self-appointed? How structured is their society?)

Nope. They are loners. If you did find a few that banded together it would be sort of like a tribe or a gang. They would pick the strongest/wisest/whatever to be the leader, and they would create whatever survival of the fittest type laws they could think of to live by.

A note here, that when vampires start moving in packs, they are likely to be pretty dangerous and far more animal like in their attacks. They are more likely to go into frenzies, and they are more likely to act out of brute violence. They would be harder to reason with and harder to drive out of your town.

Vampires are pretty territorial though, so banding together into groups is highly unusual and would only happen in rare instances. If more than one vampire showed up in the same town, they would more likely fight like a pair of pit fighting roosters and whom ever was more powerful would take over the territory while the other would flee to a different town.

– Do they have laws? What are they? How are they enforced? Is it regional? International? Is each city independent or are their overall laws that all vampires across the globe adhere to? (I.E is there a masquerade law (Vampire: The Masquerade) preventing vampires from revealing their existence to the mortal world?)

See my last few answers.

How is the creation of new vampires dealt with? Is it restricted or regulated? What are the punishments for creating a vampire without permission? What are the prerequisites for creating a new vampire (What sort of person do they select? Why?)

This question does not apply to my vampires.

Upon creating a vampire, does the sire remain with the new vampire and teach them or is it normal for them to be abandoned and left to fend for themselves?

This question does not apply to my vampires.

Is the relationship between sire and childe/fledgling close? Do they have any mystical connection to each other?

This question does not apply to my vampires.

Are your vampires solitary creatures or do they form groups/Covens? How do they get along with other vampires? How about other supernaturals? (Werewolves for instance)

I just answered this a few questions back.

Are your vampires territorial or nomadic? What happens when another vampire strays into their territory?

I just answered this a few questions back.

One Final Added Note: In my adult books (which are very M rated adult books and no publisher will touch them so I have self-publish them) my True Vampires are the same as everything else on this list, except the have the added feature of looking, dressing, and acting uncannily like Tim Curry’s Dr Frank-N-Furt (and the rest of the crew) from Rocky Horror Picture Show. (My second fave vampire movie, after Bela Lugosi’s Dracula.) So in my children’s books, my vampires stay more Dracula style, but in my adult books my vampires toss their cloths aside in a very Transylvania Transvestite Vampire gone Mad Scientist insane sort of way. :) I love Tim Curry’s transvestite vampire almost as much as I love Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. Heck, I love all drag queens and crazy cannibalistic, rock signing, mad scientist, vampire drag queens are even better. :)

Plus, I’m a huge Liberace` fan, and I’ve always thought of him as looking like a glittering vampire, so my adult book vamps got a touch of Liberace-ism in them too. :)

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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Vampire discussion: the technical aspects (A NaNoWriMo Post)

Thursday, November 5, 2009 · Leave a Comment

So, I’ve been reading all the Vampire Threads on NaNoWriMo, when I found this one on: Vampire discussion: the technical aspects and this one Vampire Guidlines…?, and they inspired me to spend the last 3 hours figuring out who and what my vampires are and than writing up an answer. YOW! What a long post this one is!

Here is my answer:

There are different types of vampires in my way of thinking, but for the book I am currently working on there are just two types of vampires, which I refer to as: True Vampires and Common Vampires. As you will notice from my answers, my entire vampire system is based largely on Dracula the book and Bela Lugosi’s representation of the Dracula movie. So basically if it isn’t happening in either the book or Bela Lugosi’s version of the book, than you can bet it isn’t going to happen in my book either. my vampire’s are pretty much straight up Classic Dracula Style Vampires. (My other types of vampires – the ones not in my NaNovel 09 – are quite different from the True Vampires and the Common Vampires I am focusing on today.)

My personal guidelines (for True Vampires and Common Vampires, as seen in my NaNovel 2009) are as follows:

Creation:

“True Vampires” are evil men who were too evil for Hell and are cursed to walk the Earth forever, neither dead no alive and are thus Undead. They are humans whose souls have been condemned. Some men who are really black hearted, like Count Dracula (who is the main vampire in my book btw) can use black magic (aka super evil deeds and calling on demons for help) to turn themselves into a vampire. “True Vampires” are extremely rare, as few people are wicked enough to become one. They are immortal and can not be killed or defeated in any way, shape, or form, they can only be temporarily stopped, imprisoned, or delayed, which only lasts until they escape and rise again.

“Common Vampires” are people who became vampires by being bitten by a “True Vampire”. They do not turn with just one bite. It takes a series of bites over many days. With each bite they grow weaker and become paler and more mindless/hypnotized. These are more like zombies than vampires. They are mindless drones who do the bidding of the True Vampire that turned them. Because they are humans who bodies were possessed (as opposed to humans who’s souls are condemned) and thus are not actually 100% dead, but rather in a sort of animated coma, they are not immortal, can be killed, thus saving their souls from being lost.

For most Common Vampires, a stake through the heart will release them from the True Vampire’s spell. For those that have been under the True Vamps spell for a really long time, they may also require decapitation, because the True Vamp’s hold on them is very strong.

An added Note: Only the True Vamp that turned them into a Common Vamp has the power to control them. In other words an alternate True Vamp could not come in and give the Common Vamp orders, because they are hypnotized and will only obey the True Vamp whom they refer to as “Master”.

Physical Features:

What does your vampire look like?

“True Vampires” are usually men (as women rarely commit the horrendous acts of evil required to become a True Vamp). They look just as they did before they died, only their skin is much paler and their bodies are as cold as ice. However they dresses and acted when they were alive, is how they continue to dress and act as the Undead.

“Common Vampires” are not yet dead. They are zombie-like victims of a True Vamp’s spell. Common Vampires tends to be woman, because True Vampires have a tendency to go after female humans more often than male humans. They look exactly as they did before being bitten, except that they have a pale bloodless look to them, dark circles around their eyes, they have blood shot, blank, empty staring eyes. They look dead. They walk around in a trance, and no longer act like themselves. They kind of just stand around waiting for the True Vamp to give them orders and tell them what to do.

Do they retain their humanity? Do they have a conscience? Or have they detached? Do they have two sides to themselves, is the vampire a separate personality (more like a possession or a demon) with their human side fighting against it (or not as the case may be).

However they acted, thought, felt, talked, etc before they were a vampire, they continue to act. Their personality remains the same. Keeping in mind that they were most likely a cruel, emotionless serial killer before they died (which would be the type of person who would be condemned to walk eternity as a True Vampire), that means they are likely to be a cruel, emotionless serial killer after they died as well. In other words the type of person who would get turned into a True Vampire would be some one like Jack the Ripper, Adolf Hitler, or of course Prince Vlad Dracule III (who is the real life prince whom became the fictional Count Dracula btw), so if a True Vampire showed up, you can bet his pretty darned evil or he would not have become a vampire to begin with.

Like wise it is possible for them to have a change of heart and repent and try to spend eternity making amends for their prior wrongful deeds. In such a case, where they truly had a 100% change of heart and repented, they could move on in life and work towards becoming a guardian angel and than spend eternity helping mortals.

Do your vampires have growing hair and fingernails? Do their hair and nails still grow? Or are they trapped how they looked when they were turned (Anne Rice’s vampires revert to how they looked when the died upon waking every evening. One character cuts her hair off every night.)

Not sure about the True Vampires, seeing how they are dead and all. I’ll have to think about that some more. They are sort of trapped in how they looked when they died. They age though – really fast if they go to long without blood. But once they’s had blood they revert back to the way they looked at the time they died.

The Common Vampires do have growing hair and fingernails, because they are not actually dead.

– Eyes – Are their eyes unnatural? A strange colour? Do they change colour depending on whether they’ve fed? (Twilight) Do they have a certain vividness to them, a strange gleam? (See Anne Rice). Do their eyes change when they’re about to attack? (See Game Face) or do they have normal human eyes? Can they see in the dark? Does this give them a light sensitivity? Do their eyes glow or have animalistic traits?

Their eyes are whatever color they had before the became a vampire.

A True Vampire’s eyes look the same a when they were alive, except when they hypnotize their victims than their eyes have and “animal glow” to them (like when lights hit an animal’s eyes at night.) Their eyes are described as “glowing like hot coals” or “burning like fire balls” when they feed on blood – they sort of go into a frenzy over blood, and that’s when their eyes start glowing.

They can see in the dark, in fact they can see in the dark better than in the day (like a cat or an owl) which is part of the reason they come out at night rather than during the day.

A Common Vampire, which is not dead, just mesmerized, looks the same, except they have dark circles around their eyes, and they have blood shot, blank, empty staring eyes. Like a dead person, the color is gone from their eyes, due to the extremely dilated pupils. In other words, they look dead.

– Game face – When about to attack, do they physically change? Do their entire features twist and contort (Buffy) or do their eyes change at all? (Moonlight has eyes going pale blue, Being human had them going black).

See my answer above for info about their eyes.

I never liked how the Buffy vamps twisted all out of shape into grotesque monsters. My vamps don’t do that – though the True Vamps could if they wanted too, seeing how they can shape-shift (usually into wolves, bats, etc.)

True Vamps tend to have a heightened sexual appeal just before attacking, (they seem sexier, irresistible, gorgeous, etc) thus attracting the opposite sex to them, making it easy for them to lure their victim to them with less resistance.

Common Vamps do not shape shift or change appearance, they remain in their zombie like state.

– Fangs – Do they have fangs? (some vampires have a piercing tongue or sting instead) Are these fangs just elongated canines or lateral incisors? Are they hollow like a snake and secrete venom? Are they very sharp or just pointed enough to make biting a little bit easier? Do they grow back if lost? Do they retract? Alternately, do they have rows upon rows of sharp teeth (30 days of night) instead of just the usual fangs? How long are they? (TruBlood vampires have very long fangs). – I have a vampire race who don’t have any fangs at all, they use knives to draw blood.

Depends on the book. I tend to change this to match the particular vamp I’m writing about. In some stories they have long snake like fangs that drip venom – very Cobra/Rattlesnake/Pit Viper – very sharp and deadly. In other stories they have near normal teeth, with only slightly more pointed upper canines – just pointed enough to draw blood.

My most often used reoccurring vamp (the sparkling silver skinned drag queen, seen only in my banned M-Rated adult books, The Twighlight Manor Series; and these books were written in the 1970s through 1980’s btw, nearly 30 years before Twilight’s sparkling vampires, which has caused some of my fans to point to Twilight and scream plagiarism, seeing how she used so many things out of my books, including the title) is a salamander mermen and thus has row after row after row of sharp piranha like teeth.

– Claws – Do they have claws at all? Are these more like animal claws or talons or simply long, very sharp nails?

Claws are one of the first things people notice about my True Vampires. They are somewhat like eagle talons. Very sharp and made for tearing flesh.

In my adult books, the drag queen vamps keep them cut in a more human like manner, and also paint them.

The Common Vamps have normal nails.

– Pallor – Are they pale? Are they blue, green, yellow? or some other unnatural shade. Are they deathly looking? Is their skin supple and soft to the touch or hard and stony/marble-like? (Twilight, Anne Rice) Is it more like the skin of a corpse? Is there any reason for any of this?

They are very, very pale, nearly as white as snow. Some have a ashen grey tint, others are stark white. They look dead and bloodless. Their skin remains soft to the touch.

– Can they shape change? Into what? (Bats, wolves and vermin are most common). If not into animals, can they become mist?

Depends on the story. Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

Common Vamps do not shape shift or change appearance, they remain in their zombie like state.

– Are they unnaturally beautiful? Do they just retain their normal human appearance? Are they hideous and deformed (Nosferatu). Does their appearance change depending on whether they’ve fed or not? (E.g: Do they retain their youth if fed but become hag-like without blood? Do they get a flush of life from feeding (warmer to touch, blushed skin etc). Do their eyes dull without blood? Do they become sluggish and sick looking?)

True Vampires look as they did before they died, but they tend to have a heightened sexual appeal just before attacking, (they seem sexier, irresistible, gorgeous, etc) thus attracting the opposite sex to them, making it easy for them to lure their victim to them with less resistance.

If they go too long without blood, they start to age rapidly, losing their eternal youth. They require blood, not to stay alive, but rather to stay youthful and to prevent themselves from turning into a dried up skeletal corpse with dehydrated “beef-jerky” skin. Drinking blood keeps them soft and fleshy. Vampires that refuse to drink blood, turn into dried up prunes and gain a skeletal grim reaper look to them. Just after feeding on blood they gain a warmer, rosy glow, and a slightly bloated look. They tend to sleep just after feeding, and by the time they awake a few hours later the rosy glow and bloated look has gone away.

Common Vamps rarely attack, and do not shape shift or change appearance, they just remain in their zombie like state and await orders from their master. They only attack humans if commanded to by the master.

– Do they have any physical abnormalities? (One nostril, furry feet, a bare skull etc. One vampire legend even has a creature who’s skin is blackened from the funeral pyre, another had metal teeth and hooked feet.)

Only if they already had physical abnormalities prior to becoming a vampire, do they have physical abnormalities afterwards. They can however be damaged in battle (lose an arm, get a gashed face, etc.) and thus gain physical abnormalities after becoming a vampire.

– Are all of their kind only one gender? (Some vampires across the world are only male or only female)

“True Vampires” are usually men (as women rarely commit the horrendous acts of evil required to become a True Vamp).

Common Vampires tends to be woman, because True Vampires have a tendency to go after female humans more often than male humans (unless of course they are gay). The choice of who to attack is a very sexual thing. True Vamps tend to use sexual attraction in order to get their victim close enough to them, in order the bite their neck.

In my children’s books, this fact is never mentioned, however the “law” remains the same: True Vampires are nearly always male and Common Vampires are nearly always female.

– Can they move soundlessly?

True Vamps can, yep. They are know for “appearing out of no where”, not because they magically appeared, but because no one heard them come into the room, thus it seems like they magically appeared from out of no where.

Common Vampires are not so stealthy. Being in a zombie like trance, they tend to be some what clumsy and may walk into things.

Biology:

What makes your vampire a vampire

Being a parasite, like a leach that needs a host, is the only real requirement to make a vampire a vampire.

True Vampires need blood from a host and are undead. This is what makes them a vampire.

Common Vampires, are not really vampires, they are just mistaken for vampires because they look like True Vampires and are in a trance by the True Vampire that controls them. Common Vampires are in fact Zombies, not vampires. They serve as hosts and slaves of the True Vampires. They are not dead. They do not drink blood unless commanded to by their True Vampire Master. They have no free will of their own.

As I said before, I have many types of vampires and not all of them feed on blood or are undead. The True Vampires and the Common Vampires are the only two being used in my NaNovel ‘09 so those are the only two I’ve been mentioning in my answers here.

In addition to those two types, however, I have also used others

    My Twighlight Manor Electric Eel Sirens are mer-folk vampires (and are a type of Fae or Faerie). They are very much alive, can be killed, and may or may not feed on the blood of their victims. They are only seen in my M-rated stories, because they are highly sexual and prey on human victims for sex, rather than for blood. They feed on the life force of humans, leaving their victims near comatose after an attack (an attack being more or less rape.) They are somewhat akin to incubus and succubus.

    My Twighlight Manor Phookas, likewise are alive and can be killed, but are incredibly strong and can snap a full grown man’s bones with their bare hands, so killing one is not easy. These are the darkest of my vampires, very much an animalistic monster, and a type of Fae or Faerie, best described as being a sort of demon. These human looking creatures, act like frenzied sharks and will not only drink the blood of their victims, but will also tear them limb from limb and gorge themselves on human flesh. These shape shifters can look like anything or any one – they are commonly known to look like your lover/spouse, in order to trick you into bed with them, where they have violent sex with you (usually killing you by the time they are done), than eat you in a very black widow manner.

    Yeah – my Twighlight Manor books are pretty dark, violent, sadistic, and full of sex crazed, blood sucking, flesh eating, drag queen, cannibal vampires. It pushes all the limits and is high on graphic sex and brutal violence. My Twighlight Manor vampires can’t go any where’s near a YA or children’s book, so that’s why I’m not focusing on them in this question and answer session here.

– Do they breathe?

True vampires = They must, though I never thought about it before.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead.

– Do they have a heartbeat? If so, is it fast? Erratic? Slow?

True vampires = They must, though I never thought about it before.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead. In their zombie like state, I would assume it to be very slow though.

– Are they actually dead? Did they rise from the grave? (Some legends mention corpses coming to life if a cat jumps over the grave or if moonlight crosses the body)

True vampires are actually dead, but have not left their body and have not passed of their either Heaven or Hell, because they were so wicked and did such evil acts while they were alive, that they are cursed to walk eternity as the undead – a fate worse than hell.

Common Vampires? They are not dead. They are hapless victims of True Vampires.

– Are they immortal or do they still age? If immortal, do they get bored of living and destroy themselves? Dig themselves in and sleep for a few centuries? (Lestat slept for several centuries and emerged in the 1980s. The vampires in the World Of Darkness often do this). Does the magic keeping them “alive” only last so many centuries?

True Vampires are immortal; doomed to walk the earth for ever and ever. They can never dead, because they are already dead. You can temporarily defeat them, but you can never kill them, because they are already dead. They keep coming back. They always come back.

There is no rest for the wicked. They retreat during the day, but may or may not sleep. Sleep for centuries is not a thing they could do even if they wanted to. They can become trapped in a coffin for centuries, but they do not spend that time asleep, rather they spend it howling with rage and frustration as they try to claw their way out of the coffin. Once trapped in their coffin the only way they can escape is if some one still alive releases them yy opening the coffin. Thus it is possible for centuries to pass before they “return from the grave”.

Common Vampires, unless released from their True Vampire Master’s trance, will die a week or so after becoming his prey. Sometimes they are turned into True Vampires by their Master, but this is a rare occurrence that only happens when the True Vamp decides he wants to keep the Common Vamp as his bride.

– Are they cold to the touch? Room temperature? Hot?

True Vampires are cold. Very cold. Think, like you just stuck your hand in a vat of liquid nitrogen or dry ice, when you shake hands with them. This cold is so penetrating, that you can feel cold ait wafting off of their body, before you even get really close to them.

Common Vampires, being humans in a trance, are still warm, though they may feel slightly colder than is normal due to their being nightly drained of more blood by the True Vamp that is controlling them. Eventually (after a couple of weeks) they will die from blood loss and the True Vampire will seek out a new victim/host.

The best sure way to tell a Common Vampire from a True Vampire is to shake hands with them. The Common Vampire will still feel somewhat warm, while the True Vampire will feel like you have a hand full of dry ice.

– Can they reproduce? Does that ahem, area, work at all?

In my adult stories, sex seems to be what drives a True Vampire to attack their victims. They have a strong sexual desire, but the desires can not be fulfilled (part of their punishment, is that they must spend eternity wanting things they can not have, sex being the top of the list of things they want and can never have.) This is why they lure their victims in, than suddenly go into a rage and drain them of their blood.

In my children’s books this subject (sex/reproduction/etc.) is never mentioned, alluded to, or hinted at in any way or form.

– Do they need to sleep? If so, how often and for how long? Is this a “sleep of the dead” (as in, they show no signs of life at all and are basically a corpse) or more like normal human sleep? Do they dream? Do they sleep in a coffin or have to keep native soil on them? (some stories have the vampire sleeping in several inches of blood (Carmilla)

How they Sleep:

The True Vamps: They sleep during the day. They can sleep where ever they want. They don’t have to sleep in their coffin, though some just seem to do so for some unknown reason. Most prefer to keep the coffin hidden away somewhere and avoid sleeping in it, in order to avoid becoming trapped in it, as trapping a vampire in it’s coffin is the best way to imprison it for centuries. They must however have the dirt from their grave with them. Thus they may keep a box of dirt under their bed, or fill their coffin with dirt, etc.

It’s not so much that they actually NEED the dirt, as it is, they are very, extremely OCD and are compelled to have the dirt with them, otherwise they simply toss and turn, unable to sleep because all they can think about is how they need their grave dirt their with them. It’s a psychological thing sort of like the kid that can not sleep without a teddy bear and a night light.

There is no rest for the wicked. They retreat during the day, but may or may not sleep and their sleep is far from restful. Sleep for centuries is not a thing they could do even if they wanted to. They can become trapped in a coffin for centuries, but they do not spend that time asleep, rather they spend it howling with rage and frustration as they try to claw their way out of the coffin. Once trapped in their coffin the only way they can escape is if some one still alive releases them yy opening the coffin. Thus it is possible for centuries to pass before they “return from the grave”.

The Common Vamps don’t really sleep, they just sort of stand there waiting for the True Vamp to give them orders.

– Can they sweat? If not, does this lead to problems dealing with temperature shifts? Do they sweat blood? Conversely, can they cry?

True vampires = I never thought about it before. I don’t think they can sweat or cry. I’ve never known any of mine to do either, so they must not be able to, though I do not have an explanation as to why this would be.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead. They are not likely to cry though, due to their trance like state.

– Can they be active during the day? What happens if they go into sunlight? (Do they combust? Or do they just run the risk of dehydrating. If they sparkle, kill this character NOW) Does sunlight strip them of their powers (Dracula) or have no affect at all? Does it hurt their eyes? Does it burn? Do they tan?

Because of their super pale skin, they have no resistance to UV rays and thus get super wicked horrendously awful sunburns, wick, do not kill them, but will weaken them something fierce. They do however get a stronger resistance to sunlight the older they get, so Count Dracula can go out during the day, providing the UV factor isn’t too high (ie – on cloudy, overcast, or foggy days), but their sensitivity to sunlight does weaken them so they don’t do it if they don’t have to.

This applies to both True and Common Vamps, due to their pale skin.

– Healing. Can they heal unnaturally fast or do they have to feed to heal? Can they heal at all? Does it leave a scar? Can they regenerate lost limbs? Not heal from certain damage inflicted to certain areas (Heart, Brain etc) or by certain materials? (Wood, Silver, cold iron etc). Do they heal so quickly they run the risk of healing over bullets and such forth? (thus needing reopen the wound to dig them out) or does their body push out foreign objects as it heals? (Like Wolverine in the second X-men movie lol)

True Vampires heal very fast, mostly while they are sleeping. They can be wounded, injured, and weakened, and will return to their coffin to sleep and re energize. A wound that would kill a live mortal, will only slow down and weaken the undead immortal True Vampire. A wound that in a mortal would take weeks to heal, would heal in a True Vampire in just one night (or two). It’s not an instant heal, but pretty close to it.

Common Vampires, being humans in an animated coma, are weaker than normal and thus are easily wounded, easily put out of commission, and have a very slow ability to heal. They are thus easily defeated, easily killed, and their true purpose is to serve as a device to slow up any attack on the True Vampire and allow him extra time to escape.

– Are they unnaturally fast? Strong? How fast? How strong?

True Vampires: yes
Common Vampires: no.

True Vampires can move faster, or rather they seem to move faster because they are so silent when they move. I;m not sure if they are actually moving faster or if it’s just and illusion caused by the fact that you never hear them coming.

They are very strong. A True Vampire can easily crush and man’s neck or lift him up by gripping his throat, just using one hand.

Common Vampires are much slower than normal, due to their weakened state from loss of blood and due to their being in a trance. They are also far weaker than normal, for the same reasons.

Can they get sick? If not, do they carry disease? Can they infect their victims with this illness?

True vampires = They must, though I never thought about it before. But yes, I would assume they could get sick and/or carry illnesses and spread them to their victims. I’ve just never had occasion to use such events in any of my stories as yet.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead.

– Do they bleed?

True vampires = I don’t think they can bleed, seeing how they are dead and all. I’ve never known any of mine to bleed, so they must not be able to, though I do not have an explanation as to why this would be. It is one of the ways to tell a True Vampire from a Common Vampire.

Common Vampires = Of course they do. They are not dead. It is one of the ways to tell a True Vampire from a Common Vampire.

Tell-tale signs:

How can others tell it’s a vampire?

Number one best way: shake their hand. They are colder than a deep freeze. You can probably tell before you shake their hand, as the room gets colder when they enter it, because their body is like it’s giving off dry ice.

In Filipino legend, a specially prepared oil of coconut and various herbs would begin to boil if a vampire was nearby. Does this sort of thing ever happen?

Yak Butter turns rancid when True Vamps are around. This weird fact was created by me as a result of a NaNoWriMo DARE. :)

Another sort of vampire caused blights, crops would fail and plants wither in their presence. Does this sort of thing ever happen?

The trees and grass and plants around a True Vamp’s house are always dead and brown and shriveled up. I believe this may be largely due to prolonged exposure to the cold air that the True Vampires give off.

Do they cast a shadow? Is it a normal shadow?

I have no idea. They so rarely go outside on sunny days that I never noticed.

Do they show up in photographs? If so, do they show up normally?

The do not photograph. The photos come out a blurred snow haze, and often cameras stop working after they touch them.

– How do animals react toward them? Hostile? Fearful? Submissive?

Depends on the animal and the vampire. Some react violently and try to attack the vampire. Some are terrified and flee at the presence of the vampire. Some are indifferent and don’t notice the vampire. Some will follow, obey, and help the vampire. I have no idea what causes the difference, nor do I try to explain it.

Can they cross running water?

I see no reason why they can’t. They often do. All my books are set in Southern Maine, where it is next to impossible to go any place without crossing running water of some sort.

Powers/Abilities:

– Do they have magical mystical powers? (Hypnotism, mind control, control animals, shapeshifting, spider climbing, mind reading) Explain how these work. Do they need some sort of focus? (Some vampires had a magical hat, I’m not kidding! How about an amulet or ring of some sort?) – Do they have an unusual method of locomotion? (Hopping? Flying? There’s some who split off their upper torso and others who fly around as a disembodied head. Some even have their feet on backwards)

Common Vampires do not have any special powers or abilities. They are just zombie-drone minions of the True Vampires.

“Regular” True Vampires have the following abilities:

    Movement Abilities:

    -Inhuman Speed
    -Unearthly Reflexes
    -Vertical Ascension (climbs walls)
    -Gliding (with help of cape)
    -Bat Form
    -Mist Form
    -Flight
    -Move Silently

    Offensive Abilities

    -Fangs
    -Vampiric Claws
    -Enhanced Senses
    -Animalistic Frenzy
    -Superhuman Strength
    -Mind Control
    -Wolf Form
    -Horrific Transformation
    -Glamor

    Defensive Abilities

    -Fast Healing
    -Impervious to bullets
    -Intimidation

“Super Powerful” True Vampires (such as Dracula) also have these additional “rare” abilities:

    Rare Movement Abilities

    -Clown Frenzy
    -Astral Projection
    -Dodge Daylight
    -Spider Climb
    -Cat’s Grace
    -Shadow Conceal

    Rare Offensive Abilities

    -Pyrokinesis
    -Corrosion
    -Control Mall Santas
    -Ironic Annihilation
    -Purge Blood
    -Pestilence
    -Mummification
    -Blood Soaked Vengeance (Carrie)
    -Hellfire
    -Demonic Familiar
    -Bloodletting
    -Vampire Lord
    -Summon Horseman
    -Shadow Transformation
    -Bone Spikes
    -Demon Summoning
    -Telepathy
    -Drain Youth
    -Raise Zombies
    -Invisibility
    -Shadow Manipulation
    -Blood to Ashes
    -Command a Wolf Pack
    -Command Rat Swarm
    -Cause Madness
    -Intoxicating Bite

    Rare Defensive Abilities

    -Veil of Thorns
    -Winged Guard
    -Premonition
    -Indestructible
    -Iron Skin
    -Create Illusion
    -Immunity to Religious Icons
    -Immaterial (can walk through solid walls)
    -Resistance to Sunlight
    -Immunity to Silver

    (This list of abilities was copied from the Zanga Game Vampire Wars, btw) I liked it so I decided to use it for my own vamps.

A Common Vampire can not do any these things. Because they are a drone they have no special powers to speak of. It is one of the ways to tell a True Vampire from a Common Vampire.

Weaknesses/Disabilities: Are they repelled by holy symbols? How about Garlic? What about Prayer? How do you kill them? What repels them? Holy water, religious symbols, garlic, wild rose, salt. Some are repelled by pregnant women (Dhampire: Stillborn) or old women (Fillipino myths).

Can only certain weapons or materials harm them? (Silver, cold iron, consecrated items, certain woods? Plants?)

Any weapon can harm them, it’s just that those made out of iron or blessed with Holy Water do more damage.

    Holy waters: – Can burn skin and temporarily blind, but it depends upon the faith of the person throwing the water. Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, in the hands of an atheist, the holy water would have no effect at all, while in the hands of the Pope it may just disable the vampire for years.

    This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires.

    Silver: Silver is for werewolves NOT vampires. What do you think Dracula’s medallion (the one he always wears round his neck on a red ribbon) is made out of?

    Iron: Gives of strong energies, which can completely over power a weaker vampire. Even Dracula is effected by it some, though not much. Note that Iron only works on True Vampires, not Common Vampires.

    Iron horseshoes are hung over doors in barns to keep vampires from draining the cows and horses (real folklore, which I also use in my books).

    Iron boot scrapers are left on door steps to keep vampires out, because if a vampire (who are all extremely OCD) sees a boot scrape he is compelled to clean his boots and touching the iron sends him packing. (another real folklore that I use in my books.)

    Coffin nails are made out of iron (more real folklore) to keep a vampire from opening his coffin and coming out of it, thus trapping the vampire in the coffin until such time someone (most likly grave robbers) opens the coffin thus removing the iron nails from the lid.

    Any sort of coffin nails iron or otherwise will keep a Common Vamp locked in, because of their weakened state.

    Mirrors: Do they have a reflection? If so, is it normal or twisted? Blurred? Inhuman?:

    It’s not that vampires do not have a reflection. It’s that they do not recognize their reflection. When they look in the mirror they expect to see themselves looking as they did when they were alive, and they are always shocked and horrified by their ghastly chalk appearance. Thus they refuse to have mirrors near them and will smash any mirror they see.

    Vampires can be deflected from an attack, by showing them their reflection, which causes them to attack the mirror and than run away in horror. This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires, as Common Vampires in their zombie-like state do not see their reflection or anything else for that matter.

    Sunlight: Because of their super pale skin, they have no resistance to UV rays and thus get super wicked horrendously awful sunburns, wick, do not kill them, but will weaken them something fierce. They do however get a stronger resistance to sunlight the older they get, so Count Dracula can go out during the day, providing the UV factor isn’t too high (ie – on cloudy, overcast, or foggy days).

    This applies to both True and Common Vamps, due to their pale skin.

    Crosses: Same as Holy Water, but not limited to crosses – any religious icon from any faith will work. Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, in the hands of an atheist, the cross would have no effect at all, while in the hands of the Pope it may just disable the vampire for years.

    This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires.

    Holy Land/Church: Can not enter if the congregation is holy and faithful. Same as Holy Water: Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, if the congregation has a lot of hypocrites, sinners, and/or atheists in it, the church would have no effect at all and the vampire could walk right on in with no problems at all, while a congregation filled with super faithful orthodox devotees to their faith could keep a vampire at bay baring him from entering the church and if their faith was strong enough they may be able to weaken and thus disable the vampire for years.

    This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. A True Vamp may send a Common Vamp into the church in his place.

    Also, even when entering a church full of unfaithful – the invitation to pass the doorway law still applies. See Doorways, below for more info on this.

    Do they have extremely sensitive hearing? Eye sight? Smell? Can these cause complications? (Strong sense of smell may explain the repulsion to garlic for instance. Sensitive hearing leaves them vulnerable to being deafened by loud noises)

    Yes. Yes. and Yes. True Vampires have extremely super sensitive hearing, eye sight, taste, and smell. Also their skin is pretty sensitive.

    The end result of this is, they can’t go outside on sunny days with out risk of severe sunburn and “snow blindness” (temporary blindness caused by bright light). When they do go outside during the day, they wear dark glasses and carry parasols (Chinese rice paper type) to shade their faces.

    Their cloths have to be made of soft non-allergenic fabrics which is why much of their wardrobe is made of silk, silk velvet, satin silk, spun silk, ect. in order to avoid skin irritation.

    They like quite neighborhoods away from traffic, children, barking dogs, gangs, etc, due to their overly sensitive hearing. As a result they will often live on the farthest outskirts of town, or in a big well sound proofed house/castle far into the woods or outside of town. When entering a vampire’s house, he will always ask you to remove your shoes and wear soft slippers, so that the sound of your shoes does not give him a headache.

    Due to their sensitive eyes, they will have only soft light bulbs in their house, if they even use light bulbs at all. They are more likely to use gas lights or kerosene lamps or candles which give off a soft glow. They may have no lights in their house at all, keeping in mind that they can see better in the dark than in the light and so really have no need for lights at all.

    Their taste buds pick up even the faintest of tastes with an overwhelming power. When they do eat and drink normal foods, they will choose things with very bland flavors – white bread for example. They avoid all things with a strong taste: garlic, onions, chili peppers, etc.

    Garlic: A big bad super wicked extremely powerful no-no for both True Vampires and Common Vampires. But there is nothing magical about it, it’s an alergy thing. Due to their heightened senses, vampires (both True and Common) are wicked sensitive to strong smells and strong tastes. All strong smells and flavors cause problems for them, so if no garlic is handy, you can throw onions at them too. Garlic however is different. In addition to the strong smell and flavor, True Vampires are especially allergic to the acidic juices of garlic. Garlic burns the flesh of a normal human, causes watery eyes, and stings the tongue. So when used against the sensitivities of a vampire the effect it a hundred times worse than it is on a human. Garlic itches and burns the skin, causes swollen eyes and sinuses, temporarily blinding the vampire, and over all is pretty much effects them as if you had just taken a bath in poison ivy juice. A vampire’s allergies to garlic can put them out of commission and into the sick bed for weeks. Garlic is the number one way to keep a vampire at bay. They simply can not tolerate the “allergy effects”. You can disable and extremely weaken a vampire if you can trick them into eating garlic, and if you can get a string of garlic cloves around their neck.

    Doorways: Can they enter a home uninvited? What happens if they try to do so? (In Let the Right One in, the vampire literally haemorrhages and bleeds from every orifice if they try it, in Buffy and Being Human, it’s like there’s an invisible force barring them.) They can’t cross if it’s personal property unless they are invited in. If the head of the household invites them in, they are able to keep coming back. If any one other than the head of the household invites them in, they must be re invited after each visit, until the head of the household invites them, and than they can keep coming back without farther invitation. This applies only to True Vampires.

    In most cases they can if it is public building. Say a grocery store or restaurant where “the public is welcomed” to just walk in. Welcome signs, Yes We Are Open Come In sings, ect, all act as an invitation, thus allowing the vampire to enter.

    However, when there is a sign such as “By Appointment Only”, they could not enter without an invitation.

    There is no magic or special powers involved in any of this. It’s an OCD thing and is purely psychological. The vampire simply truly believes he can not enter any place without an invitation and thus you could keep a vampire out of your house simply by hanging a sign on your door that says: “Sorry we are closed, come back later”.

    This also results in vampires only ever entering a public building during it’s open hours. If the sign says open 9AM to 5PM, than the vampire could only enter between 9AM and 5PM, otherwise he would need some one to specifically invite him in between 6PM and 8AM.

    Common Vampires, because they are humans in a trance are not effected by the invitation rule, and thus the True Vampire will often have a Common Vampire minion, which he can send into houses and do his bidding, without the need of gaining an invite into the house.

    Wood: Is only a minor deterant. Only sacred woods, such as Hawthorn, Dogwood, RoseWood, etc, have any real effect. It’s a combination of an allergy thing, and the faith of the believer thing. See Holy Water.

    Mustard Seeds, Matchsticks, Sunflowers Seeds, etc: Do they have a form of OCD? (Some oriental vampires had a compulsion to count grains of rice left scattered, this would distract them till morning stopping them from hunting that night)

    My Vampires are extremely OCD. It’s on the the things you will see EVERY SINGLE ONE on my vampires with. It’s like becoming a vampire does something to their mind and fills them to overflowing with all sorts of weird phobias that they have no control over.

    Due to a True Vampires, extremely overblown OCD problems, you can easily escape an attack, by grabbing a handful of whatever small object is near by and tossing them into the air. When they scattered across the floor, the vampire will scramble to pick them all up and count every single one of them. Thus it is handy to keep a bag of mustard seeds, matchsticks, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, pepper corns, marbles, gum balls, or and other small easily scattered object in your pocket.

    This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires.

    Knots and Shoelaces: Once again, due to a True Vampires, extremely overblown OCD problems, you can easily escape an attack, or otherwise slow down a vampire by hanging knotted ribbon or ropes in their path. A common real modern day myth/practice it to tie a pair of sneakers together and than throw them over the telephone wire in front of your house or place of business, to keep vampires out. (Ever wonder why you always see a pair of sneakers hanging from telephone wires in the city – well now you know.) If a vampire is chasing you and you have time, take off your shoes, tie them together and throw them over the nearest wire or tree branch.

    The purpose of this action is similar to scattered small objects. A vampire, due to his OCD, is compelled to stop whatever he is doing and focus all of his attention on untieing the knots and than placing the ropes, ribbons, or shoes in order, all lined up in a neat row.

    This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires.

    What happens when they’re destroyed? Do they turn to dust? Do they revert to the age they should have been had they been mortal? Do they rapidly decay? Do they just remain looking like a human corpse?

    True Vampires can not be destroyed – they are immortal undeads, people whom have already died.

    Common Vampires on the other hand: Because Common Vampires are not actually dead, they can be killed, however, they usually don’t need to be killed to break the spell they are under. All you really need to do is undo the hypnotism that the True Vampire did to them, and than put them on bed rest and give them some blood transfusions. However, people are too stupid to ever think of doing this, and usually react by thinking the only way to protect themselves from the Common Vampire, is to stake it’s heart, cut off it’s head, and bury it’s body face down in a coffin that has had the lid nailed on with iron nails.

    The hypnotism will wear off on it’s own if you can keep the victim away from the True Vampire that is controlling them. The best way to do this is to put the Common Vampire in a small cabin full of mirrors, with mustard seeds scattered on the roof of the cabin and the floors inside it, and have the Common Vampire wear a crown of garlic on their head and another around their neck. Than, never invite the vampire in, replace the mustard seeds every time he starts removing them, replace the mirrors as fast as he breaks them, and make sure she never removes the garlic cloves from around her neck. After a week or so of this the Vampire Master will give up and look for a new and less well protected victim and the spell will be broken, thus the Common Vampire will come out of their trance and return to their old normal human self again.

    Can vampirism be cured? If so, how? (In the Lost Boys, killing the head vampire would cure those who had not yet tasted human blood.)

    See my last answer.

    – Do they feel pain?

    Yes, but they are more resistant to it, thus can take quite a bit of pain before the pain becomes unbearable enough for them to back down.

    Common Vampires, being entranced, feel nothing and will not stop coming at you until you kill them, which is not too hard to do.

    – Can bullets hurt them? What about other normal weapons? Can they be suffocated or drown?

    Anything can hurt True Vampires, it just takes a lot more of whatever it is, to do the kind of damage it would do with a human. But, being immortals, their wounds no matter how severe they are, will never kill them.

Blood/Manner of feeding; The all important question of blood:

– Do they feed on blood or life force? Do they also eat flesh?

In my children’s books, the vampires are never actually seen to be drinking blood or attacking humans. It’s hinted to, and every one knows that is what the vampire does when he goes out at night, but it’s never an on screen action. My goal is a scary bedtime story for children, not terrorizing them into sleeping with every light in the house on.

A vampire gone on a frenzy, will eat the flesh as well as drink the blood. In my rather violent (and written for adults) Twighlight Manor series, feeding frenzies are common place, with the vamps going into rabid-like fits attacking their victim and tearing them to pieces, gorging themselves on the blood, drinking it straight from the heart itself after tearing open the chest and ripping out the rib cage, than relishing the heart, eyes, and brain far above all else.

In either case, blood is what keeps a vampire going. They won’t die without the blood, but they will dry up like old brittle bones if they don’t keep drinking it. They will also age and start falling apart (like the CryptKeeper) if they don’t get enough blood. Blood keeps them young, soft, and youthful.

Common Vampires do not eat or drink unless told to by their “master” the True Vampire. Likewise they will only drink blood if told to do so by the True Vamp that controls them.

– Do they need to drink blood to survive? Or are they simply addicted? (Being Human)

See my last answer.

– What happens if they don’t feed?

See my last answer.

– Will animal blood suffice or does it need to be human blood?

Blood is blood, they’ll take whatever is handy at the moment. Human blood is preferred, but whatever is handy will do if no humans are around. Though, my vamps never go after animals in my children’s books, because when I was about 12 I read a vampire book for kids, which had a vampire go after the MCs dog and turn the dog into a vampire, and I had nightmares for weeks after that. So I never write vampires going after animals in any of my children’s stories, and rarely do I do so in my adult stories either.

– Can they drink packaged blood? Or does the anticoagulant make it unpalatable? Do they need to have fresh living blood?

Blood is blood, they’ll take whatever is handy at the moment, but warm, fresh, pulsating blood from a still beating heart is strongly preferred. Cold, stale, unfresh, unpulsating, packaged blood is a last resort if nothing else is available.

– Do they have to drink the blood or can they inject it? Will a blood transfusion work just as well if not better than drinking?

Blood is food, injections will not work.

– Can they eat normal food? What happens if they do?

Though they don’t need to and thus don’t eat normally, they can eat in order to keep up appearances. For example if an unsuspecting human invited them over for a dinner party, they could ea whatever was served (providing such things as garlic and onions or any thing else they are allergic too, were not served).

True Vampires can eat and drink regular normal foods, but these do not seem to sustain them well. The nutrients are not absorbed the way they were when they were alive. As a result they drink blood to get the nutrients, because for some reason it’s the only way they can. No idea why that is, I don’t know much about medical/biology stuff so I didn’t bother to work out all the details. I simply said it and thus that made it so and my readers will just have to take my word for it.

Common Vampires do not eat or drink unless told to by their “master” the True Vampire. Likewise they will only drink blood if told to do so by the True Vamp that controls them.

– Do they bite? Where? (Neck, upper thigh, wrist? Chest?) If they don’t bite, what do they use instead (Fingernails/claws? A knife? A straw)

Neck. The True Vampires almost always, they go for the neck. No. Always. I don’t think I’ve ever written a True Vampire that DIDN’T go straight or the neck.

I did once consider having a vampire that lost it’s teeth, using a straw to drink the blood. I’m guessing the straw would have been sort of a thin metal pipe to stab them in the neck with first. I never wrote that one though, just considered using it for a really elderly vampire that had lost it’s teeth.

Though in my Twighlight Manor series, feeding frenzies are common place, with the Phookan Vamps going into rabid-like fits attacking their victim’s chest and tearing them to pieces, gorging themselves on the blood, drinking it straight from the still beating heart itself after tearing open the chest and ripping out the rib cage and lungs, etc.

How they Bite:

Exactly like Bela Lugosi did in Dracula: Mesmerize victim with flashy wow factor.

*Runs down stairs flapping huge satin cape while jumping from the stairs pretending to fly like superman.* (Or in my more adult books, they do a Tim Curry and flash their sequined underwear at you.) :)

Now that he’s got your attention (and you are wondering what the hell a grown man is doing running around in sequined underwear and flapping his cape at you) – hypnotize them.

“Looook intwo mah eyezzzzzz. You a undah mah conwrol. Ah vant your blood.”

While you stand there wondering what the heck this guy is saying, he takes the opportunity to grab your neck and bite. :)

I just love overblown over the top theatrical vampire stunts. :) I especially love it when they run by flapping their capes. I got a thing for guys in capes (and sequined underwear). :)

So the whole thing is basically “Look at the weird gorgeous guy in the cape running circles around me, I wonder what he’s doing, I wish I could understand what he saying, oh wait, why his biting my neck? Help, he mesmerized me with his flashy cape so long that I didn’t realize he was about to tear my throat out! AAAAArrrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!. . . . yes . . . master . . . . anything you say . . . master.. . . I’m . . . coming . . . master.”

I love Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. Any vampire that doesn’t act like Bela Lugosi isn’t a real vampire in my book. Unless of course he’s acting like Tim Curry’s Dr. Frank-N-Furt, than it’s okay to not act like Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. ;)

If they hunt, how do they do it? Do they have a specific sort of person (only women, only blonds etc etc) or animal they prefer?

I explained this a ways back, but basically all True Vampires are males and all their “Common Vampire) victims are females (unless the True Vampire is gay).

– How often do they need to feed? (every night? Every fortnight? Once a month? )

Depends on the story and how the plot is going. Usually True Vamps need blood every night or at the very least every once every three days.

So, vampires drink blood, but where does it go?

Uhm . . . in their stomach??????????? Seems like the logical place for it to go.

Do they use the bathroom?

I would assume they must. It never occurred to me to think about it.

How much blood are they drinking, anyway?

Who the hell knows. As much as they vant.

Killing One:

You can’t. I sort of already explained that back when I was talking about how they are created.

Society:

How do vampires function politically and socially

True Vampires are pretty much loners and keep to themselves. Because you got to be pretty darn wicked to become one, there actually are not too many True Vampires out there. You are not likely to meet more than one in your entire life time, and there would rarely be more than one in your local town.

Once in a while, a dictorial vampire will come a long and he’ll pretend to be a mortal so as to work his way into politics and take control and use his power to kill lots of humans. (Adolf Hitler for example, in my books, would have been very likely a Vampire, which would explain how he had gained such power so fast.)

Do these vampires have a social hierarchy? How is it sorted? (By age? By power? By merit or by eliminating your rivals? Are they ruled by committee or government or by a single individual? How are these leaders selected or are they self-appointed? How structured is their society?)

Nope. They are loners. If you did find a few that banded together it would be sort of like a tribe or a gang. They would pick the strongest/wisest/whatever to be the leader, and they would create whatever survival of the fittest type laws they could think of to live by.

A note here, that when vampires start moving in packs, they are likely to be pretty dangerous and far more animal like in their attacks. They are more likely to go into frenzies, and they are more likely to act out of brute violence. They would be harder to reason with and harder to drive out of your town.

Vampires are pretty territorial though, so banding together into groups is highly unusual and would only happen in rare instances. If more than one vampire showed up in the same town, they would more likely fight like a pair of pit fighting roosters and whom ever was more powerful would take over the territory while the other would flee to a different town.

– Do they have laws? What are they? How are they enforced? Is it regional? International? Is each city independent or are their overall laws that all vampires across the globe adhere to? (I.E is there a masquerade law (Vampire: The Masquerade) preventing vampires from revealing their existence to the mortal world?)

See my last few answers.

How is the creation of new vampires dealt with? Is it restricted or regulated? What are the punishments for creating a vampire without permission? What are the prerequisites for creating a new vampire (What sort of person do they select? Why?)

This question does not apply to my vampires.

Upon creating a vampire, does the sire remain with the new vampire and teach them or is it normal for them to be abandoned and left to fend for themselves?

This question does not apply to my vampires.

Is the relationship between sire and childe/fledgling close? Do they have any mystical connection to each other?

This question does not apply to my vampires.

Are your vampires solitary creatures or do they form groups/Covens? How do they get along with other vampires? How about other supernaturals? (Werewolves for instance)

I just answered this a few questions back.

Are your vampires territorial or nomadic? What happens when another vampire strays into their territory?

I just answered this a few questions back.

One Final Added Note: In my adult books (which are very M rated adult books and no publisher will touch them so I have self-publish them) my True Vampires are the same as everything else on this list, except the have the added feature of looking, dressing, and acting uncannily like Tim Curry’s Dr Frank-N-Furt (and the rest of the crew) from Rocky Horror Picture Show. (My second fave vampire movie, after Bela Lugosi’s Dracula.) So in my children’s books, my vampires stay more Dracula style, but in my adult books my vampires toss their cloths aside in a very Transylvania Transvestite Vampire gone Mad Scientist insane sort of way. :) I love Tim Curry’s transvestite vampire almost as much as I love Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. Heck, I love all drag queens and crazy cannibalistic, rock signing, mad scientist, vampire drag queens are even better. :)

Plus, I’m a huge Liberace` fan, and I’ve always thought of him as looking like a glittering vampire, so my adult book vamps got a touch of Liberace-ism in them too. :)

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Off Topic P.S. To [quote=Cliff Richardson]…[/quote]

I LOVE YOUR SIGGIE GIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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Vampire discussion: the technical aspects (A NaNoWriMo Post)

Thursday, November 5, 2009 · Leave a Comment

So, I’ve been reading all the Vampire Threads on NaNoWriMo, when I found this one on: Vampire discussion: the technical aspects, and it inspired me to spend the last 3 hours figuring out who and what my vampires are and than writing up an answer. Here is my answer:

There are different types of vampires in my way of thinking, but for the book I am currently working on there are just two types of vampires, which I refer to as: True Vampires and Common Vampires. As you will notice from my answers, my entire vampire system is based largely on Dracula the book and Bela Lugosi’s representation of the Dracula movie. So basically if it isn’t happening in either the book or Bela Lugosi’s version of the book, than you can bet it isn’t going to happen in my book either. my vampire’s are pretty much straight up Classic Dracula Style Vampires.

Creation:

“True Vampires” are evil men who were too evil for Hell and are cursed to walk the Earth forever, neither dead no alive and are thus Undead. They are humans whose souls have been condemned. Some men who are really black hearted, like Count Dracula (who is the main vampire in my book btw) can use black magic (aka super evil deeds and calling on demons for help) to turn themselves into a vampire. “True Vampires” are extremely rare, as few people are wicked enough to become one. They are immortal and can not be killed or defeated in any way, shape, or form, they can only be temporarily stopped, imprisoned, or delayed, which only lasts until they escape and rise again.

“Common Vampires” are people who became vampires by being bitten by a “True Vampire”. They do not turn with just one bite. It takes a series of bites over many days. With each bite they grow weaker and become paler and more mindless/hypnotized. These are more like zombies than vampires. They are mindless drones who do the bidding of the True Vampire that turned them. Because they are humans who bodies were possessed (as opposed to humans who’s souls are condemned) and thus are not actually 100% dead, but rather in a sort of animated coma, they are not immortal, can be killed, thus saving their souls from being lost.

For most Common Vampires, a stake through the heart will release them from the True Vampire’s spell. For those that have been under the True Vamps spell for a really long time, they may also require decapitation, because the True Vamp’s hold on them is very strong.

An added Note: Only the True Vamp that turned them into a Common Vamp has the power to control them. In other words an alternate True Vamp could not come in and give the Common Vamp orders, because they are hypnotized and will only obey the True Vamp whom they refer to as “Master”.

Physical Features:

“True Vampires” are usually men (as women rarely commit the horrendous acts of evil required to become a True Vamp). They look just as they did before they died, only their skin is much paler and their bodies are as cold as ice. However they dresses and acted when they were alive, is how they continue to dress and act as the Undead.

“Common Vampires” are not yet dead. They are zombie-like victims of a True Vamp’s spell. Common Vampires tends to be woman, because True Vampires have a tendency to go after female humans more often than male humans. They look exactly as they did before being bitten, except that they have a pale bloodless look to them, dark circles around their eyes, they have blood shot, blank, empty staring eyes. They look dead. They walk around in a trance, and no longer act like themselves. They kind of just stand around waiting for the True Vamp to give them orders and tell them what to do.

Do your vampires have growing hair and fingernails?

Not sure about the True Vampires, seeing how they are dead and all. I’ll have to think about that some more.

The Common Vampires do, because they are not actually dead.

How they Sleep:

The True Vamps: They sleep during the day. They can sleep where ever they want. They don’t have to sleep in their coffin, though some just seem to do so for some unknown reason. They must however have the dirt from their grave with them. Thus they may keep a box of dirt under their bed, or fill their coffin with dirt, etc.

It’s not so much that they actually NEED the dirt, as it is, they are very, extremely OCD and are compelled to have the dirt with them, otherwise they simply toss and turn, unable to sleep because all they can think about is how they need their grave dirt their with them. It’s a psychological thing sort of like the kid that can not sleep without a teddy bear and a night light.

The Common Vamps don’t really sleep, they just sort of stand there waiting for the True Vamp to give them orders.

Powers/Abilities:

Common Vampires do not have any special powers or abilities. They are just zombie-drone minions of the True Vampires.

“Regular” True Vampires have the following abilities:

    Movement Abilities: -Inhuman Speed -Unearthly Reflexes-Vertical Ascension (climbs walls)-Gliding (with help of cape)-Bat Form -Mist Form -Flight -Move Silently Offensive Abilities -Fangs -Vampiric Claws -Enhanced Senses-Animalistic Frenzy -Superhuman Strength -Mind Control -Wolf Form-Horrific Transformation-Glamor Defensive Abilities -Fast Healing -Impervious to bullets-Intimidation

“Super Powerful” True Vampires (such as Dracula) also have these additional “rare” abilities:

    Rare Movement Abilities -Clown Frenzy-Astral Projection-Dodge Daylight-Spider Climb-Cat’s Grace-Shadow Conceal Rare Offensive Abilities -Pyrokinesis-Corrosion-Control Mall Santas-Ironic Annihilation-Purge Blood-Pestilence-Mummification-Blood Soaked Vengeance (Carrie)-Hellfire-Demonic Familiar-Bloodletting-Vampire Lord-Summon Horseman-Shadow Transformation-Bone Spikes-Demon Summoning-Telepathy-Drain Youth-Raise Zombies-Invisibility-Shadow Manipulation-Blood to Ashes-Command a Wolf Pack-Command Rat Swarm-Cause Madness-Intoxicating Bite Rare Defensive Abilities -Veil of Thorns-Winged Guard-Premonition-Indestructible-Iron Skin-Create Illusion-Immunity to Religious Icons-Immaterial (can walk through solid walls)-Resistance to Sunlight-Immunity to Silver(This list of abilities was copied from the Zanga Game Vampire Wars, btw) I liked it so I decided to use it for my own vamps.

Weaknesses/Disabilities:

    Holy waters: – Can burn skin and temporarily blind, but it depends upon the faith of the person throwing the water. Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, in the hands of an atheist, the holy water would have no effect at all, while in the hands of the Pope it may just disable the vampire for years.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. Silver: Silver is for werewolves NOT vampires. What do you think Dracula’s medallion (the one he always wears round his neck on a red ribbon) is made out of? Iron: Gives of strong energies, which can completely over power a weaker vampire. Even Dracula is effected by it some, though not much. Note that Iron only works on True Vampires, not Common Vampires.Iron horseshoes are hung over doors in barns to keep vampires from draining the cows and horses (real folklore, which I also use in my books).Iron boot scrapers are left on door steps to keep vampires out, because if a vampire (who are all extremely OCD) sees a boot scrape he is compelled to clean his boots and touching the iron sends him packing. (another real folklore that I use in my books.)Coffin nails are made out of iron (more real folklore) to keep a vampire from opening his coffin and coming out of it, thus trapping the vampire in the coffin until such time someone (most likly grave robbers) opens the coffin thus removing the iron nails from the lid.Any sort of coffin nails iron or otherwise will keep a Common Vamp locked in, because of their weakened state. Mirrors: It’s not that vampires do not have a reflection. It’s that they do not recognize their reflection. When they look in the mirror they expect to see themselves looking as they did when they were alive, and they are always shocked and horrified by their ghastly chalk appearance. Thus they refuse to have mirrors near them and will smash any mirror they see.Vampires can be deflected from an attack, by showing them their reflection, which causes them to attack the mirror and than run away in horror. This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires, as Common Vampires in their zombie-like state do not see their reflection or anything else for that matter. Healing: True Vampires heal very fast, mostly while they are sleeping. They can be wounded, injured, and weakened, and will return to their coffin to sleep and re energize. Common Vampires, being humans in an animated coma, are weaker than normal and thus are easily wounded, easily put out of commission, and have a very slow ability to heal. They are thus easily defeated, and their true purpose is to serve as a device to slow up any attack on the True Vampire and allow his extra time to escape. Sunlight: Because of their super pale skin, they have no resistance to UV rays and thus get super wicked horrendously awful sunburns, wick, do not kill them, but will weaken them something fierce. They do however get a stronger resistance to sunlight the older they get, so Count Dracula can go out during the day, providing the UV factor isn’t too high (ie – on cloudy, overcast, or foggy days).This applies to both True and Common Vamps, due to their pale skin. Crosses: Same as Holy Water, but not limited to crosses – any religious icon from any faith will work. Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, in the hands of an atheist, the cross would have no effect at all, while in the hands of the Pope it may just disable the vampire for years.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. Holy Land/Church: Can not enter if the congregation is holy and faithful. Same as Holy Water: Weak faith = weak effects. Strong faith = strong effects. In other words, if the congregation has a lot of hypocrites, sinners, and/or atheists in it, the church would have no effect at all and the vampire could walk right on in with no problems at all, while a congregation filled with super faithful orthodox devotees to their faith could keep a vampire at bay baring him from entering the church and if their faith was strong enough they may be able to weaken and thus disable the vampire for years.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. A True Vamp may send a Common Vamp into the church in his place.Also, even when entering a church full of unfaithful – the invitation to pass the doorway law still applies. See Doorways, below for more info on this. Garlic: A big bad super wicked extremely powerful no-no for both True Vampires and Common Vampires. But there is nothing magical about it, it’s an alergy thing. Due to their heightened senses, vampires (both True and Common) are wicked sensitive to strong smells. Garlic burns the flesh of a normal human, causes watery eyes, and stings the tongue. So when used against the sensitivities of a vampire the effect it a hundred times worse than it is on a human. Garlic is the number one way to keep a vampire at bay. They simply can not tolerate the “allergy effects”. You can disable and extremely weaken a vampire if you can trick them into eating garlic, and if you can get a string of garlic cloves around their neck. Doorways: They can’t cross if it’s personal property unless they are invited in. If the head of the household invites them in, they are able to keep coming back. If any one other than the head of the household invites them in, they must be re invited after each visit, until the head of the household invites them, and than they can keep coming back without farther invitation. This applies only to True Vampires.In most cases they can if it is public building. Say a grocery store or restaurant where “the public is welcomed” to just walk in. Welcome signs, Yes We Are Open Come In sings, ect, all act as an invitation, thus allowing the vampire to enter. However, when there is a sign such as “By Appointment Only”, they could not enter without an invitation.There is no magic or special powers involved in any of this. It’s an OCD thing and is purely psychological. The vampire simply truly believes he can not enter any place without an invitation and thus you could keep a vampire out of your house simply by hanging a sign on your door that says: “Sorry we are closed, come back later”.This also results in vampires only ever entering a public building during it’s open hours. If the sign says open 9AM to 5PM, than the vampire could only enter between 9AM and 5PM, otherwise he would need some one to specifically invite him in between 6PM and 8AM.Common Vampires, because they are humans in a trance are not effected by the invitation rule, and thus the True Vampire will often have a Common Vampire minion, which he can send into houses and do his bidding, without the need of gaining an invite into the house. Wood: Is only a minor deterant. Only sacred woods, such as Hawthorn, Dogwood, RoseWood, etc, have any real effect. It’s a combination of an allergy thing, and the faith of the believer thing. See Holy Water. Mustard Seeds, Matchsticks, Sunflowers Seeds, etc: Due to a True Vampires, extremely overblown OCD problems, you can easily escape an attack, by grabbing a handful of whatever small object is near by and tossing them into the air. When they scattered across the floor, the vampire will scramble to pick them all up and count every single one of them. Thus it is handy to keep a bag of mustard seeds, matchsticks, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, pepper corns, marbles, gum balls, or and other small easily scattered object in your pocket.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires. Knots and Shoelaces: Once again, due to a True Vampires, extremely overblown OCD problems, you can easily escape an attack, or otherwise slow down a vampire by hanging knotted ribbon or ropes in their path. A common real modern day myth/practice it to tie a pair of sneakers together and than throw them over the telephone wire in front of your house or place of business, to keep vampires out. (Ever wonder why you always see a pair of sneakers hanging from telephone wires in the city – well now you know.) If a vampire is chasing you and you have time, take off your shoes, tie them together and throw them over the nearest wire or tree branch.The purpose of this action is similar to scattered small objects. A vampire, due to his OCD, is compelled to stop whatever he is doing and focus all of his attention on untieing the knots and than placing the ropes, ribbons, or shoes in order, all lined up in a neat row.This only works with True Vampires, not Common Vampires.

Blood:

In True Vampires: They can eat and drink regular normal foods, but these do not seem to sustain them well. The nutrients are not absorbed the way they were when they were alive. As a result they drink blood to get the nutrients, because for some reason it’s the only way they can. No idea why that is, I don’t know much about medical/biology stuff so I didn’t bother to work out all the details. I simply said it and thus that made it so and my readers will just have to take my word for it.

In Common Vampires: They do not eat or drink unless told to by their “master” the The Vampire. Likewise they will only drink blood if told to do so by the True Vamp that controls them.

How they Bite:

Exactly like Bela Lugosi did in Dracula: Mesmerize victim with flashy wow factor.

*Runs down stairs flapping huge satin cape while jumping from the stairs pretending to fly like superman.*

Now that you’ve got their attention (and they are wondering what the hell a grown man is doing running around flapping his cape) hypnotize them.

“Looook intwo mah eyezzzzzz. You a undah mah conwrol. Ah vant your blood.”

While they stand there wondering what the heck this guy is saying, he takes the opportunity to grab their neck and bite. :)

I just love overblown over the top theatrical vampire stunts. :) I especially love it when they run by flapping their capes. I got a thing for guys in capes. :)

So the whole thing is basically “Look at the weird gorgeous guy in the cape running circles around me, I wonder what he’s doing, I wish I could understand what he saying, oh wait, why his biting my neck? Help, he mesmerized me with his flashy cape so long that I didn’t realize he was about to tear my throat out! AAAAArrrrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhh!!!!!!!. . . . yes . . . master . . . . anything you say . . . master.. . . I’m . . . coming . . . master.”

I love Bela Lugosi’s Dracula. Any vampire that doesn’t act like Bela Lugosi isn’t a real vampire in my book.

So, vampires drink blood, but where does it go?

Uhm . . . in their stomach??????????? Seems like the logical place for it to go.

Do they use the bathroom?

I would assume they must. It never occurred to me to think about it.

How much blood are they drinking, anyway?

Who the hell knows. As much as they vant.

Killing One:

I sort of already explained that back when I was talking about how they are created.

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Off Topic P.S. To [quote=Cliff Richardson]…[/quote]

I LOVE YOUR SIGGIE GIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!
All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

http://twitter.com/EelKat
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→ Leave a CommentCategories: Bela Lugosi · Dracula · EelKat · NaNoWriMo · NaNovel 2009 · Wendy C. Allen · advice for writers · creative writing · horror · national novel writing month · vampires · writing horror

The NaNoWriMo DARES Thread – Liberace as a Vampire

Thursday, November 5, 2009 · Leave a Comment

black birdfall leaves centerblack bird

LOL! I was reading this thread http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/node/3311308 and all it’s sparkely glittering vampire talk every one was talking about instead of having sparkely shinned Twilight vampires they are going to have vampires that actually wear glitter instead…. (sorry, I have not read Twilight so, yeah, you guys sort of lost me there, but from reading the posts I get the idea, whatever) ANYWAYS … I’m a huge Liberace` fan, and he sort of looks like Bela Lugosi, only instead of dressing like a vampire he wore head to toe pink sequins.

So I’m reading the posts on this thread, and I don’t know anything about Twilight vampires, but I’m a huge fan of both Bela Lugosi and Liberace`, and when I read you guy’s post the first thing that popped into my head was Liberace` wearing his pink glitter cape, running after people biting their necks. LOL! OMG! I got to go add that to my vampire NaNovel now. :)

Anyways, all that gave me an idea for a dare to pass along to you guys:

———-

DARE: Have vampires that sparkle
BP: If they sparkle because they wear glitter paint
TBP: If they sparkle because they wear sequined tuxedos
Homemade cookies: If your male vampire wears pink sequined suits and purple feather boas
A trip to the Moon: If your vampire is Liberace – glittering sequined, feathered, diamond studded concert pianist by day – evil blood sucking vampire by night

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

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http://eknano.blogspot.com

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The NaNoWriMo DARES Thread – Liberace as a Vampire

Thursday, November 5, 2009 · Leave a Comment

black birdfall leaves centerblack bird

LOL! I was reading this thread http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/node/3311308 and all it’s sparkely glittering vampire talk every one was talking about instead of having sparkely shinned Twilight vampires they are going to have vampires that actually wear glitter instead…. (sorry, I have not read Twilight so, yeah, you guys sort of lost me there, but from reading the posts I get the idea, whatever) ANYWAYS … I’m a huge Liberace` fan, and he sort of looks like Bela Lugosi, only instead of dressing like a vampire he wore head to toe pink sequins.

So I’m reading the posts on this thread, and I don’t know anything about Twilight vampires, but I’m a huge fan of both Bela Lugosi and Liberace`, and when I read you guy’s post the first thing that popped into my head was Liberace` wearing his pink glitter cape, running after people biting their necks. LOL! OMG! I got to go add that to my vampire NaNovel now. :)

Anyways, all that gave me an idea for a dare to pass along to you guys:

———-

DARE: Have vampires that sparkle
BP: If they sparkle because they wear glitter paint
TBP: If they sparkle because they wear sequined tuxedos
Homemade cookies: If your male vampire wears pink sequined suits and purple feather boas
A trip to the Moon: If your vampire is Liberace – glittering sequined, feathered, diamond studded concert pianist by day – evil blood sucking vampire by night

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

http://twitter.com/EelKat
http://www.facebook.com/EelKat
http://eknano.blogspot.com

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Bela Lugosi · Dracula · EelKat · Liberace · NaNoWriMo · NaNovel 2009 · Wendy C. Allen · glitter · national novel writing month · vampires

RE: How To Scare a Vampire . . .? (NaNoWriMo)

Wednesday, November 4, 2009 · Leave a Comment

A few days ago, on my blog and on NaNoWriMo, I asked How To Scare a Vampire . . .? This is my farther thoughts on the matter.

I’ve decided I want to base my vampires heavily on Dracula (the book & the Bela Lugosi movie – not the later newer versions which are changed quite a bit). With that in mind, I am now re-reading Dracula, which I haven’t read in about 20 years, and finding a lot of stuff I forgot.

For one thing, staking Dracula DOESN’T kill him in the book, it only stops him from rising back up. But if you remove the stake, he gets right back up like nothing happened. Well, I forgot all about that part! I got so used to seeing Buffy-style-stake-the-vampire-and-they-go-poof that I completely forgot that the wooden stake DOESN’T traditionally kill vampires! YAY! So my book isn’t going off track by saying the stake doesn’t work when it comes to killing vampires. Maybe, deep down inside I remembered that part and that’s why I had it so the stake couldn’t kill them??? The book itself hints that Dracula can never be defeated, but can only be stopped and held dormant, by a stake through the heart and being locked in the coffin by use of iron nails, and suggests that even though they stopped in in the end – they don’t know for how long and he could come back if someone undid their work.

According to Dracula (the book) garlic, holy water, and religious icons (not just crosses, but ANY religious icon which the wearer/owner holds as sacred) are REALLY big when it comes to defense against vampires.

I also forgot that Dracula spends a good part of the book, running around as a wolf, not a bat.

Sunlight is not used against Dracula, because he walks around town in broad daylight. Granted there is always a storm on those days, thus the sun is filtered by the clouds, but still. (a storm which he caused to happen, through use of black magic.)

Also in the book, people do not become vampires by being bitten by Dracula. It takes weeks of being bitten over and over again for them to die from blood loss, and only 4 females ever became vampires, because Dracula wanted them as wives and forced them to drink his blood, which thus caused them to become vampires. So, my using the whole vampires being extremely rare and not wanting competition, fits with that too.

Also, while Dracula himself seems to be undefeatable, his brides, are not, and can be killed by a stake through the heart followed by decapitation. Something to do with the fact that they became vampires by drinking his blood, which I guess was only a black magic spell and not real vampirism, and thus the spell can be broken with the use of a stake and decapitation. Apparently there is a difference between a REAL vampire, like Dracula, (who I guess is some sort of demon and never was Human) and Humans who are turned into vampires, like his brides, and while you can’t kill the real ones, you can kill the human-turned-vampire ones. Huh. I forgot all that stuff too. I’m glad I’m re-reading the book, because some how years of watching Buffy and Angel and Charmed, resulted in me thinking of vampires very differently than the way they were by traditional classic standards.

Anyways, seeing how garlic is such a really, really, REALLY big thing in the book, and having it around really pisses Dracula off, I think I’m going to put most of the emphasis in my story, on using garlic to drive the vampire out of town.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

http://twitter.com/EelKat
http://www.facebook.com/EelKat
http://eknano.blogspot.com

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RE: How To Scare a Vampire . . .? (NaNoWriMo)

Wednesday, November 4, 2009 · Leave a Comment

A few days ago, on my blog and on NaNoWriMo, I asked How To Scare a Vampire . . .? This is my farther thoughts on the matter.

I’ve decided I want to base my vampires heavily on Dracula (the book & the Bela Lugosi movie – not the later newer versions which are changed quite a bit). With that in mind, I am now re-reading Dracula, which I haven’t read in about 20 years, and finding a lot of stuff I forgot.

For one thing, staking Dracula DOESN’T kill him in the book, it only stops him from rising back up. But if you remove the stake, he gets right back up like nothing happened. Well, I forgot all about that part! I got so used to seeing Buffy-style-stake-the-vampire-and-they-go-poof that I completely forgot that the wooden stake DOESN’T traditionally kill vampires! YAY! So my book isn’t going off track by saying the stake doesn’t work when it comes to killing vampires. Maybe, deep down inside I remembered that part and that’s why I had it so the stake couldn’t kill them??? The book itself hints that Dracula can never be defeated, but can only be stopped and held dormant, by a stake through the heart and being locked in the coffin by use of iron nails, and suggests that even though they stopped in in the end – they don’t know for how long and he could come back if someone undid their work.

According to Dracula (the book) garlic, holy water, and religious icons (not just crosses, but ANY religious icon which the wearer/owner holds as sacred) are REALLY big when it comes to defense against vampires.

I also forgot that Dracula spends a good part of the book, running around as a wolf, not a bat.

Sunlight is not used against Dracula, because he walks around town in broad daylight. Granted there is always a storm on those days, thus the sun is filtered by the clouds, but still. (a storm which he caused to happen, through use of black magic.)

Also in the book, people do not become vampires by being bitten by Dracula. It takes weeks of being bitten over and over again for them to die from blood loss, and only 4 females ever became vampires, because Dracula wanted them as wives and forced them to drink his blood, which thus caused them to become vampires. So, my using the whole vampires being extremely rare and not wanting competition, fits with that too.

Also, while Dracula himself seems to be undefeatable, his brides, are not, and can be killed by a stake through the heart followed by decapitation. Something to do with the fact that they became vampires by drinking his blood, which I guess was only a black magic spell and not real vampirism, and thus the spell can be broken with the use of a stake and decapitation. Apparently there is a difference between a REAL vampire, like Dracula, (who I guess is some sort of demon and never was Human) and Humans who are turned into vampires, like his brides, and while you can’t kill the real ones, you can kill the human-turned-vampire ones. Huh. I forgot all that stuff too. I’m glad I’m re-reading the book, because some how years of watching Buffy and Angel and Charmed, resulted in me thinking of vampires very differently than the way they were by traditional classic standards.

Anyways, seeing how garlic is such a really, really, REALLY big thing in the book, and having it around really pisses Dracula off, I think I’m going to put most of the emphasis in my story, on using garlic to drive the vampire out of town.

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

http://twitter.com/EelKat
http://www.facebook.com/EelKat
http://eknano.blogspot.com

→ Leave a CommentCategories: Bela Lugosi · Dracula · EelKat · NaNoWriMo · NaNovel 2009 · Wendy C. Allen · garlic · horror · national novel writing month · vampires

Real Name vs. Pen Name (A NaNoWriMo Post)

Tuesday, November 3, 2009 · Leave a Comment

Real Name vs. Pen Name

Poll: What name do you use when writing your Nano novels?

1. My Real Name
2. A Pen Name (and what is it?)
3. I’ve never written anything yet. (but what do you think you will use?)

I write under various pen names depending on what (genre, theme, ect.) I’m writing. No one knows who I am in reference to my alternate pen names, as I prefer to keep each identity separate, so sorry, I’m famous, but I’m not telling you who I am. :)

In recent years however, I have been using my real name more and more. So far for every NaNoWriMo I have used my real name, and am doing so again this year.

Of course there has been disadvantages of using my real name. Namely that I used my real name on my NaNovel 2008, which I than published, and my bishop got a hold of it, and I am now having to deal with being excommunicated from my church (LDS/Mormon) because I refused to cancel the publication of my book. :( (The book was a non-fiction autobiography of my life, btw, which was why I used my real name on it instead of one of my pen names.)

All Hail Bela Lugosi!
Dracula!

http://twitter.com/EelKat
http://www.facebook.com/EelKat
http://eknano.blogspot.com

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